This Perfect World
by K.C.Dragonfly
Summary: "It takes a lifetime to build a good reputation, but you can lose it in a heartbeat." What happens when the perfect world you have so carefully constructed begins to unravel? ... Redefining perfection
1. Chance Encounter

**Hey guys, back again :) Not much to say on this one; title is from a book I read a while ago, summary is a quote from Will Rodgers. Hope y'all enjoy, let me know your thoughts as I go. Future chapters will be longer.  
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**Oh, and there is a theme in my chapter titles :)  
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**Disclaimer: I don't own CSI or the characters ... yet. I also do not own the book 'This Perfect World' by Suzanne Bugler (although I do recommend it to anyone who has been a bully or a victim of bullying ... can't promise it will make either side feel better but it's an interesting read)  
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**x x x x**

_**Chance Encounter**_

Good job...great friends...a beautiful little girl.

For all intents and purposes I had the perfect the world.

Then I met her...

X x x

"Fuck." Catherine muttered, stooping down to retrieve her dropped purse.

It had been an ordinary, if somewhat unlucky day. She had slept through her alarm, had an argument with Lindsey about a sleepover and then, to top it off, her car wouldn't start.

So she was not entirely surprised, albeit a little pissed off, when she finally managed pay for her iced coffee-to-go and subsequently walked straight into the person behind her.

"Oh my God! I'm sorry." She stuttered, looking up into the startled gaze of a pretty red-haired woman. "I didn't see you." She attempted to explain hurriedly.

"It's okay." The woman assured, mopping up the cool dark liquid staining her blouse while Catherine fumbled helplessly with more napkins.

"I'm so sorry." Cath repeated, practically throwing the tissues at her. The woman shrugged it off, looking up curiously. "Catherine?" She queried. Cath blinked, surprised. "Catherine Flynn?"

"Uh, it's Willows now." She corrected, scrutinising the redhead closely. Hazy memories of vodka shots and drunk dancing flashed into her mind. "Lorna?" She guessed tentatively.

"Yeah, how ... how have you been?" She asked; the cold mark on her shirt long since forgotten.

"I'm good. I ..." Cath paused, noting to mess she had made of Lorna's clothes. "Are you okay? That's gonna stain."

"Don't worry about it." Lorna disregarded bluntly. "So, you're married?"

"Divorced." Cath corrected again. "Look, let me pay for the dry-cleaning at least?" She tried again, reaching for her purse, but the other woman wasn't budging on the matter. When Catherine refused to let it drop, she came up with a compromise.

"Tell you what, buy me dinner tonight and we'll call it even." She bargained with a sweet smile that stirred memories of long girly nights in Catherine's past. The blonde returned it with a bright smile of her own.

"Deal."

X x x

Despite the tumultuous start to the day, Catherine left that coffee shop with a spring in her step.

Truth be told, her life had fallen into a pattern of monotony and this invitation was the first time in months that she had felt that spark of life in the pit of her stomach again.

But it was just dinner ... right?

**x x x x**

**:)**


	2. La Suprise

_**La Suprise**_

"I think the last time we were together was ... James Keegan's grad party." Lorna mused.

"Yes, I remember the tequila fountain." Cath giggled between mouthfuls of salad.

"Do you remember Ben Harper?" Her companion asked, shovelling forkfuls of pasta into her mouth.

"I think so, was he the guy who always carried a briefcase that looked like a purse?" Cath asked, tapping her fork thoughtfully against the edge of her plate.

"No, that was George Leeman." Lorna corrected. "Ben was the guy who wore suit jackets to every lecture and used to leap out of his seat at every question."

"Oh yeah, I remember him." Catherine nodded; years of college memories flooding back to her with every minute she spent in the other woman's presence.

"He's married to a showgirl now."

"Seriously?" The blonde's eyebrows shot up.

"Seriously. He's a dentist. A highly paid one at that." Lorna said with a baffled shrug.

"Well, wonders will never cease." Catherine chuckled with amusement. Lorna smiled at the sound of her laughter, observing her for a long moment.

"So, you're divorced?" She queried at last. "Eddie?"

"That's the one." Cath nodded, taking a long sip of her wine.

"Kids?"

"A daughter. She's nine."

"Cute." Lorna smiled, drumming her fingers on her glass thoughtfully. "So, is there anyone else or..."

"Ha, with my work schedule I wish." Cath laughed. "No, I'm living without men for a while. Too complex."

"Really?" Lorna rested her elbows on the table with interest.

"Yeah, I need a simple life." She chuckled, draining the last of her wine glass.

"Simple's dull." The red haired woman scoffed, leaning back in her chair. Cath laughed, shaking her head.

"Yeah, well maybe a dull life is what I need."

"Nah, you?" Lorna shook her head with a smirk. "Miss ex-exotic dancer – turned cop. You'd get bored."

Catherine just laughed, disliking the fact that this woman could still read her so well after all these years. "Well, we'll just have to see won't we?" she said enigmatically.

"Yeah." Lorna agreed with a smile. "I guess we will."

X x x

"Thank you for the ride." Cath smiled gratefully, hopping out of Lorna's car.

"No problem. Hope yours gets sorted soon." Lorna said, climbing out herself.

"Yeah, me too. I can't take cabs to work forever." She joked.

"You know, if you ever need a lift..." Lorna offered, rounding the car the stand beside her.

"Thanks, but I think I've put you out enough today." Catherine declined. Lorna waved a disregarding hand, brushing off the comment.

"I had a really good time tonight." She said, the dusk light masking the nice shade of pink her cheeks had tinted. Cath grinned.

"Yeah, me too. We'll have to do it again. Soon."

"How about Friday?" Lorna propositioned without a moment's hesitation. Catherine laughed, slightly taken aback.

"Ah, sure. Friday sounds great." She shrugged.

"Great." Lorna smiled. Then, without warning, she leant forward placed a brief kiss on Catherine's lips. The blonde blinked, startled. The other woman, however, was oblivious as she skipped back to the driver's side and climbed in. Cath remained on the driveway; shell shocked, staring after the departing car.

Slowly, she turned and walked up to the house.

"Hey, how was dinner?" Nancy asked when she heard the familiar creek of the front door, never tearing her eyes from her book. When her sister didn't answer, she finally looked up. "Cath?"

Catherine frowned at her, still reeling. "I think that was a date."

X x x

"Hey Cath!" Warrick called for the third time. She looked up, startled.

"Sorry?" She asked, slipping her phone back into her pocket.

"Everything okay? You've been out of it all day." Rick commented with a concerned frown.

"I'm fine." She insisted, snapping back to work mode. "What have you got?"

"A few blood drops, could be incidental." Cath leant over his shoulder to see what he was looking at. She handed him a swab and stood up straight, glancing around the office. As she walked over to the desk her phone rang again, making her jump. In her hurry to shut it off, she dropped it.

"Damn it." She muttered, crouching down to retrieve it. As she was about to stand back up, her gaze landed on something else. "Hey Warrick."

"Yeah?"

"I found a condom wrapper." She stood up, meeting his eyes.

"Sex. At work." Warrick chuckled. "Well, maybe that has something to do with the boss' mysterious head injury. "I'll take it back to the lab; see if I can get a fingerprint from the woman."

"What makes you so sure it was a woman?" Catherine asked with a sly glance. Warrick laughed nervously.

"Well either way, they've got some explaining to do." He sidestepped the question. "Dating colleagues just never works."

Catherine nodded thoughtfully, eyeing the attractive dark-skinned man from beneath her eyelashes.

"So, you'd never date a colleague?" She asked, scribbling her signature on an evidence bag.

"No." He shook his head. "I mean, you start to mix work and relationships and things just get complicated."

"Yeah, complicated." Cath repeated softly. "Nick will be devastated." She added swiftly, sending him a cheeky smile. He laughed, shaking his head.

"In his dreams."

X x x

"Hey." Sara greeted, startling Catherine out of her thoughts.

"Oh, hey." She responded. Sara sent her an concerned look.

"Everything okay?"

"Oh, I'm fine. Just ... doesn't matter."

"You sure?" Sara pressed, sliding her coat on.

"I'm fine, really. Just been a long day."

"Yeah I heard." Sara laughed softly, earning her a slightly scared look from the blonde.

"You did?"

"Yeah, you uh, you need a ride?" The young woman offered, confused by her friend's odd reaction.

"What?" Cath asked in a voice a little too high. Sara blinked at her.

"Do you need a ride home, since your cars at the garage?" She repeated, thankful when relief flooded the blonde's features.

"Oh, no thank you. Nancy's meeting me for breakfast."

"Okay. Well, I'll see you tonight." Sara started to leave but stopped in the doorway, casting a puzzled look back at her friend. "Cath," she called. Catherine glanced up from her pensive spot on the bench. "Whatever's happened, try not to let it get you down. Tomorrow's another day, right?" She offered a sympathetic smile, which after a moment Cath returned.

"Right." She nodded gratefully, waiting until Sara left before pulling out her phone.

She answered on the second ring.

"Hey, Lorna. It's Catherine."

"_Hey! I was starting to get worried." _She sounded relieved.

"Yeah, sorry I was ... busy." Cath paused, not sure what else to say. "You want to go for a coffee?"


	3. Confusion of Genders

_**Confusion of Genders**_

"Alright, explain yourself!"

"What?" Cath looked up tiredly from her newspaper.

"You blew me off this morning." Nancy elaborated, helping herself to a coffee and planting herself at the kitchen table.

"Sorry Nance, something came up." Cath brushed it off.

"What could possibly have come up at seven in the morning that was more important than breakfast with your only sister?" Cath pursed her lips, debating whether or not to answer that. She decided to bite the bullet.

"I met up with Lorna." There was a moment's silence, before Nancy pulled the newspaper out of Catherine's hands and sat forward, effectively capturing her whole attention.

"Okay, you did what?"

"It was just for coffee." Cath explained hurriedly.

"And...?"

"And, that was it. We talked." She shrugged, walking over to the sink and pretending to wash up just for a reason to avoid her sister's piercing gaze.

"So, that's it? It's dealt with?"

"Kind of." Cath said tentatively.

"Catherine." Nancy pressed in a stern voice.

"We're going for dinner on Friday night." She added, looking away. She didn't even need to turn around to know what her sister's expression would be. "Don't give me that look."

"So what, you're a lesbian now?" Nancy asked sarcastically.

"No, I ..." Cath turned, leaning against the counter with a helpless look on her face. "I don't know what's going on okay? But, I had a good time with her last night." Nancy raised an eyebrow. "You know what I mean!" She jumped in before her sister's mind could run away with itself. "I like Lorna."

"'Like' her how?"

"I don't know how, okay? That's what I'm trying to find out."

"Find out what Catherine?" Nancy asked, exasperated. "I know you've been restless lately but you can't be serious about this?" Cath sighed, sloping back to her seat.

"Look, this is the first time that I have felt anything in months. I don't know what it is, I don't know why it's happening but I don't want it to stop just yet." She explained quietly. "What's the harm in letting it play out a little longer?"

"Yeah, but Cath ... lesbianism? Really?" Nancy scrunched up her nose sceptically.

"What?" She shrugged, glancing up to meet her sister's perplexed gaze. "What's a few kisses here and there? It's a bit of fun."

"Mhmm. And when it moves beyond kisses? Then what?" Catherine chewed her lip, narrowing her eyes sullenly.

"You always know how to ruin my mood."

X x x

She felt Lorna's tongue slip between her teeth, teasing her playfully. When they broke apart the redhead was sporting a mischievous grin.

"Um, do you want to come in? For coffee?" Catherine offered in an unusually high pitched voice, fumbling behind her for the door handle.

"Coffee sounds good." Lorna agreed, following her in.

Her green eyes traced the room, taking in the decor. It was not really what she expected of the cheeky, off-the-wall Catherine she had known in college; but then apparently that Catherine had grown up.

She ambled over to the mantelpiece, which was scattered with photos of a little blonde girl with sparkling blue eyes and a bright smile. If Lorna didn't know better she'd say it was a younger photo of Catherine.  
>Truth be told, she was not a fantastic lover of kids, but so far it had not been an issue. She had only met Lindsey once and it had been a fleeting introduction before Cath had hurriedly ushered the child back inside before whisking her out to dinner.<p>

The blonde reappeared with two mugs and gestured to the couch. Lorna made herself comfortable, accepting the warm drink gratefully.

"You have a lovely home." She said politely, because it sounded like something people said the first time they were in a date's house.

"It needs decorating." Cath commented, casting a glance around the room. "It's been like this since I moved in with ... Eddie."

Since their first 'date', the topic of Cath's marriage had been skirted around. She knew Lorna had never really liked Ed; and now she got the feeling that she was not thrilled to be dating someone with so much baggage. However, so far they had managed to avoid the topic and Cath was more than happy to keep it that way.

They lapsed into an awkward silence. Catherine was aware of Lorna staring at her as she sipped on her coffee; she risked a glance up, offering a nervous smile. In response, Lorna reached out to take the mug from her, placing them both on the table. Their hands free, she leant in, closing the distance between them. Catherine didn't move, allowing her to lead the way. The kiss was gentle at first, tentative. When Catherine didn't pull away, Lorna slowly deepened the kiss, inching closer on the couch and lacing a hand through her golden hair. Catherine cautiously raised a hand to cup her cheek.

When Lorna's other hand found its way to her hip, Cath's breath hitched and she pulled away. Lorna smiled sweetly at her, resting their foreheads together.

"You look cute when you blush." She mused. Cath laughed nervously.

"I uh, I have to ..." she stopped, taking a deep breath in an effort to steady her voice. "I have to go to work."

"The Catherine I knew would never let a little thing like that stop her." Lorna smirked, moving her lips to the blonde's neck.

"That Catherine didn't have bills to pay." She pointed out, swallowing hard against her companion's ministrations.

"Hmm, if you must." Lorna hummed, dropping a kiss onto her cheek before sitting back on the couch. Cath stood up, brushing herself down in a failed attempt to appear less flustered. She felt Lorna stand up too and wrap her arms around Catherine from behind. "So," the woman whispered in her ear. "When can we continue this?"

Cath released a nervous laugh.

"Um, I don't know. When are you free?"

"How about this weekend?" Lorna asked, pressing her lips to the sensitive spot behind Cath's ear. "We could see a show; maybe have a romantic dinner..." The blonde turned in her arms to face her.

"That sounds ... that sounds great." She smiled, daringly pecking her lips. Lorna grinned, releasing her and gathering up her bag.

"Great, I can't wait." Catherine walked her to the door, parting with another lingering kiss. "I'll call you tomorrow." As Lorna practically skipped down the drive, Catherine shut the door and pressed her back against it, slowly sliding to the floor.

"What's wrong with me?" she moaned.

**x x x x**

**Let me know what you think x**


	4. The trouble with Angels

**Thank you to those who have reviewed so far :)**

**Riley: Sara's going to be mentioned in chapters throughout but things will really start to pick up between them in about chapter 8 :) Glad you're enjoying so far x  
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**x x x x**_**  
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_**The trouble with Angels**_

"You know, I really should..." Catherine attempted to stand up but Lorna pulled her back down onto the bed.

"Lindsey's with your mom, you don't need to go to work, your cell phone is off." She listed, crawling up the strawberry blonde's body. "You don't need to do anything." She kissed her lips, a grin spreading across her face. "Except this." Cath responded with a nervous smile of her own. Lorna continued to grind against her, letting her fingers toy with the buttons on Cath's blouse. She peppered kisses down her chest, popping the buttons open slowly – teasingly – one by one. When her shirt finally fell open Catherine jumped, roughly pushing Lorna off of her.

"Sorry, I just ..."

"Cath." Lorna sighed, sitting up on her knees. "What's going on? Do you not want this?"

"Of course I do." Catherine defended, holding her shirt closed with one hand and running the other through her hair. "I do. I just...this is all new for me. I just need more time." She realised too late what she had just revealed. Lorna's eyes widened.

"You've ... you've never..?"

"No." Cath mumbled, sitting more upright. "I'm sorry, I probably should have told you sooner. I just didn't know how to bring it up."

"No, no it's alright." Lorna said softly, a soft frown etched onto her face. "I just wasn't expecting it that's all."

"I'm sorry." Catherine mumbled, suddenly feeling very exposed. "I just need a bit more time to get my head around all of this. I hope you don't mind?"

"Alright." Lorna conceded softly. "Just don't make me wait forever." She added with a cheeky smile, stealing a quick kiss.

X x x

"Hey Cath," Nick greeted with a warm grin.

"Hey Nicky." She responded, planting a false smile on her face. "Did you enjoy your day off?"

She didn't hear his answer, too distracted by the arrival of Sara. The brunette had slipped in quietly, nodding in greeting to them. Nick was still talking, animatedly chatting about his weekend, oblivious to the fact that no one was listening.

"That's great." Catherine agreed, having not heard a word. She sidled around the bench to lean casually beside the younger woman. "Hey Sara, something you want to tell us?"

"What?" She asked, puzzled. Catherine smirked, tracing a mark on her neck.

"Had a good night have we?" Nick chuckled, joining in when he caught on. Sara slammed her hand over the hickey, her cheeks tinting bright pink. She pursed her lips, trying to hide a smile.

"No comment." She mumbled. Catherine and Nick exchanged amused giggles.

"Oh come on, spill. Who's the lucky guy?" Cath poked her playfully in the ribs.

"Uh huh." Sara shook her head. "Last time I told you guys about my love life you left a severed finger on my table." She joked, sliding out from between them. Cath laughed, shaking her head.

"Nice try." She called out after the departing brunette. "I'll find out somehow." Once she was out of sight, Catherine and Nick's gazes met as a shared idea planted itself in their minds and they both chimed:

"Greg."

X x x

"Hey Greggo." Nick greeted sweetly, ambling into the DNA lab.

"Hey." Greg replied, sending him a suspicious look. "What do you want?"

"Nothing." Nick tried and failed to look innocent. "I just wanted to say hi, you know, before shift."

"And…?" Greg pressed, going back to his computer. Nick glided over, leaning beside him.

"And…I was wondering what you knew about Sara's date last night." Greg stopped what he was doing, casting a sly glance at the Texan.

"What do _you_ know about Sara's date?" He queried, narrowing his dark eyes. Nick shrugged.

"Nothing. That's why I came to you." To his surprise the usually impish lab rat turned sober.

"In that case it's none of your business." He snapped his attention back to his work, doing his best to ignore the confused looks he was receiving from his friend.

"You do know something don't you?" He asked.

"Sara likes to keep her private life private. I think we should respect that." Greg answered enigmatically, effectively ending the conversation. Nick shook his head in bemusement.

X x x

"Well?" Cath asked, not looking up as she poured two cups of coffee.

"He wouldn't crack. But he definitely knows something." Nick frowned, reaching for one of the mugs. He scowled when Cath moved it out of reach.

"Ah. It's not for you." As she spoke Sara wandered in and Cath immediately materialised at her side, offering her the steaming mug with a bright smile. Sara stared at it for a moment before tentatively accepting.

"Thank you." She said. "I'm still not telling you."

X x x

"So … this mystery guy. Anyone we know?" Catherine smoothly slipped into conversation as they photographed the scene.

"Greg wouldn't give in, huh?" Sara guessed correctly. Cath sent her a bashful smile.

"You know we're only teasing." She offered light-heartedly. "Although, it wouldn't hurt you to be a little more open you know." She added with a sly sideways glance. Sara shrugged.

"I have my reasons." She mumbled softly. Cath stopped what she was doing, fixing her young colleague with a curious gaze. "I trust you guys, but there are some things that you just don't need your colleagues knowing about you. You know?" Catherine's features softened.

"Yeah. I know." She whispered.

X x x

"Oh God." Cath groaned as Lorna's hands crept underneath her shirt, teasingly stroking the skin beneath her bra. She could feel hot breath on her skin.

Lorna's soft hands moved around her back, her fingertips barely brushing the clasp of the bra before Catherine stilled her movements.

"No." She whispered.

"Come on Catherine," Lorna whispered, changing their positions slightly on the couch. "Just relax."

"Lorna..." Cath began but the other woman cut her off with a soft kiss.

"We can take it slowly, just relax." She moved her lips to her neck. "Trust me Catherine." The way she spoke her name, husky and low, sent a tingle down the blonde's spine.

"Lorna, please." She begged, attempting to wriggle out from underneath her.

"What?" Lorna asked, still not stopping her ministrations.

"Please, I want you to stop." Cath said as forcefully as she could, her hands gripping the redhead's waist. Lorna finally stopped what she was doing and looked into Catherine's watery blue eyes.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"I don't know." Catherine admitted sadly. "I just can't do this."

"How do you know if you haven't tried?" Lorna contradicted. Cath met her gaze, deathly serious.

"Please." She begged again. "Just give me some more time." She could feel emerald green eyes reading her face for a long minute before she heard a soft sigh.

"Alright." Lorna agreed, climbing off her. "Look, I've got to go."

"You don't have to." Cath interjected, leaping to her feet after the other woman.

"It's okay. I get it." Lorna held up her hands. She offered what she hoped was a understanding smile, but the disappointment in her voice was hard to disguise. "I'll call you in the morning." She kissed Catherine's cheek and slipped out, leaving the blonde alone. As the door clicked closed, she dropped despondently onto the couch.


	5. Good Intentions

**Thanks again for reviewing guys. This is not my best of work but it's late and I'm tired. Hope you enjoy **  
><strong>KC x<strong>

**x x x x**

_**Good Intentions**_

"I can't believe that you're still doing this." She shook her head, at a loss.

"Yeah well, I'm starting to think you might be right." Catherine sulked pensively. Nancy's ears pricked up.

"Do tell."

"Oh, I don't know." Cath sighed. "I just … I like her a lot. And we have a really good time together. But, every time we try to … I can't." she shrugged helplessly.

"So, you haven't…"

"No." Cat moped, folding her arms onto the table and dropping her head onto them miserably. "I want to, I just keep stopping myself."

"Well, maybe that's a sign that this was a mistake." Nancy offered, taking a long sip of her coffee. Catherine looked up at her sadly.

"I don't want it to be a mistake." She whispered. "I really do like her." Nancy observed her sister thoughtfully for a moment. It had been years since she had seen her like this, possibly even since high school. She released a long sigh, putting her mug back down and reaching across the table.

"Then maybe you're just taking this too fast." She said, gently rubbing her arm with her fingertips.

"Maybe." Catherine agreed softly. "I don't know Nance; she's been patient with me so far but I don't think she's willing to wait much longer."

"Well," Nancy said softly, "maybe she's not the one you should be doing this with." Catherine sat up sharply.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, if you are serious about pursuing … this – whatever this is, maybe you should be doing it with someone who is willing to let you go at your own pace." She explained, trying to gauge her sister's reaction. Catherine was frowning, her gaze fixed on the table and an unreadable expression etched into her face.

"I don't know whether I could be with someone else – a woman. What if it's just her?"

"Then go back to men." Nancy shrugged simply, returning to her mug of coffee.

X x x

"Hey, you okay over there?" Lorna asked over the table.

"Hmm?" Catherine snapped back, blinking.

"I said are you okay?" Lorna repeated; a soft frown on her face. "You seem a bit down."

"Oh, I'm okay." Cath smiled. "Just got a lot on my mind."

"Hmm? Care to share?" Lorna asked, laying her full attention on the blonde.

"It's nothing. Really, it's just little things."

"It's the little things that make up life." Lorna said philosophically with a grin. "Tell me." Catherine opened her mouth to speak, but as her eyes traced the concern written on Lorna's pretty features, she found herself speechless. Lorna, however, misread her silence and reached across the table, lacing their fingers together. "Hey, you know I love being with you right?" She asked softly. Cath smiled.

"Yeah, of course I do." She nodded, her gaze landing unconsciously on their joined hands. "I just feel like … you know what, it doesn't matter."

"What?" Lorna pressed gently, nudging her to answer. Cath sighed, keeping her gaze averted.

"I feel like I'm stringing you along, and I promise I'm not. I just don't want you to have to wait for me."

"Catherine, look at me." Lorna instructed in a soft voice. Slowly, Cath raised her eyes. "I'm not going to hurt you. You can trust me."

A soft smile lit up Catherine's face. She stood up and leant over the table, placing a firm kiss on her girlfriend's lips; oblivious to the looks they received from the other patrons of the crowded restaurant.

"How about we go back to mine? I'm sure I've got a bottle of wine lurking somewhere." She raised an eyebrow playfully. Lorna gave her an uncertain look.

"Are you sure?" Cath grinned, tugging her hand gently.

"I'm sure."

X x x

"You know, we seem to be making a habit of this." Lorna mumbled between kisses. Catherine, pinned beneath her on the couch, didn't even attempt to respond. She merely turned her head to allow the other woman more access to the sensitive skin of her neck.

She could smell the alcohol on her breath. The empty bottle of wine glowering at them from the coffee table was testament to how long it was since they had arrived back from the restaurant. Cath had to admit, the world was starting to look a little fuzzy.

"Maybe," Lorna continued, trailing her tongue along her jawbone, "we should move this elsewhere."

X x x

And before she knew what was happening, Catherine found herself pushed roughly onto the bed with Lorna landing ungracefully atop her.

"Come on Catherine, relax." Lorna mumbled, nipping at her neck gently. She could feel Catherine's laboured breaths; feel her muscles tensing as she moved further down her neck, down her chest. For a moment she thought Cath was actually going to give in, when a firm grip on her shoulders stopped her movements.

"No." She heard the blonde whimper softly. Lorna sighed, sitting up.

"What is it honey? I thought you trusted me?" She slurred, running her hands up and down the blonde's sides.

"I do." Cath insisted tearfully. "I'm just not sure I'm ready for this yet. I want to, I just…"

"Then what's the problem?" Lorna asked, leaning back down and continuing where she had left off. "It's okay, I won't hurt you." Once again, Catherine forced her back, this time jumping violently at the intrusion.

"No!" She barked, barely stopping herself from raising a hand to the persistent woman.

Her girlfriend had apparently had enough; she clambered off the bed and gathered up her discarded shirt. Cath shuffled upright, wiping at her damp eyes. "Lorna," she whispered, attempting to reach out to her.

"You know what Cath; give me a call when you figure it out!" She spat, slamming the door on her way out. Alone, Catherine stared at the closed door for a whole minute, hiccupping sobs wrenching their way out of her against her will. Slowly, she curled up on the bed and cried.


	6. The Rebound

_**The Rebound**_

"Hey, are you even listening to me?" Nancy barked. Catherine hummed unresponsively, staring blankly ahead. Nancy pursed her lips.

"I think I'm going to get a tattoo." She stated bluntly.

"That's nice." Cath mumbled.

"Yeah, I'm thinking of getting my name in Chinese writing right up my neck." She continued in a cheery voice. "But I don't know that I can be bothered to get it translated. I might just go to my local takeaway and ask them to do it for me."

"Yeah." Cath agreed in the same monotonous voice.

"Alright." Nancy sighed, prising the mug of coffee from her sister's hands. "What's up?" Catherine blinked at her, surprised by the rude disruption to her thoughts. When her younger sister raised an eyebrow at her – her trademark 'I will find out one way or another' look – Cath relented.

"I think Lorna and I are over." She confessed sadly. Nancy's features softened.

"Why? What happened?"

"Oh, it all went horribly wrong yesterday." She sighed, waving a hand. "We went out for dinner; and then we came back here for a drink. Well, we had a bit too much and things got heated…" Nancy scrunched up her nose but didn't speak, not wanting to interrupt. "I panicked and pushed her off."

"And…" The nurse pressed when Cath stopped talking.

"She stormed out. And now she's not answering her phone."

"Maybe she just needs some time to cool off?" Nancy offered weakly. Cath sent her a sceptical look, running a hand through her hair.

"I think she's had enough."

"Look Cathy, if you weren't ready then she has no right to bully you into it. If she can't wait then it's her loss not yours." Catherine attempted a smile at her sister's efforts but it didn't quite reach her eyes.

"Thanks sis." She mumbled sadly. Nancy reached out and patted her arm softly.

"No problem." She retracted her hand and pulled out a packet of cigarettes. Catherine spotted the sly movement and her eyes widened.

"Uh hum!" She coughed loudly. Nancy raised an eyebrow and held the packet out to her, causing Catherine to roll her eyes. "Put them away Missy; if I can't smoke then neither can you."

"Fine, in that case I'm just going outside for some 'fresh air'."

"You have no willpower!" Catherine called out after her.

Left alone, however, her own willpower was starting to wane. She pulled her cell phone out and dialled the number again, holding her breath as she listened to the ever-familiar dial tone. With a sad sigh she was about to hang up when there was a click and a quiet voice filtered through the phone.

"_Hey."_

"Hi, I didn't think you were going to answer." Cath said softly, relief washing across her face, however briefly.

"_What do you want Catherine?"_ Apparently they were done with the formalities.

"I …" She stopped. What did she want? "I wanted to talk about last night."

"_Look, Cath, before you say anything – I can't do this anymore."_

"Oh. Okay." Catherine stuttered, caught off guard. "So, us…"

"_It's over_." Lorna cut her off bluntly. Almost as if she could read Catherine's silent shock on the other end, she softened her voice. _"Honey, it's not your fault. I'm just not looking for a long term relationship right now."_ She lied.

"I get it." Cath said sadly. There was a whole minute's silence before she heard the soft click as Lorna hung up. Cath dropped her phone onto the table, tears spilling from her ocean blue eyes.

Nancy shook her head silently from her spot by the door. Slowly she walked over and leant down to wrap her sister in a hug from behind.

"Do you want that cigarette now?" She felt a tearful laugh hiccup from Catherine and cuddled her tighter, nestling into her golden hair as she cried.

X x x

"Hey, there you are." Nick grinned, poking his head into the locker room. "We're going out for breakfast, you in?"

"Nah, thanks." Catherine shook her head. "I think I'm just going to head home. It's been a long day."

"Alright." The Texan agreed, a look of concern flashing through his dark eyes. "Take care."

"You guys have fun." She smiled, waiting until he left the room before letting her face fall. She didn't want to go to breakfast; but truth be told she didn't want to go home either.

Releasing a deep breath she heaved herself to her feet and grabbed her jacket.

X x x

She had been driving for what felt like an age. She wasn't really sure what she was looking for, but she had managed to find herself on the edge of the strip sailing through the gaudy lights.

She couldn't tell you what made her swerve into the parking lot and stop. She sat in her car, staring at the entrance to the club morosely. She had driven past here a million times but never once had she considered going in. Why would she?

She glanced at the screen of her cell phone. No new messages. Nothing.

"What have you done to me?" She muttered, tossing it back onto the passenger seat. Shaking her head, she reached to the keys but something stopped her and, against her will, her gaze drifted back to settle on her phone.

Practically ripping her keys from the ignition, she got out and slammed the car door shut, staring up at the bar.

X x x

Inside, she was instinctively surprised by the fact that it looked like a normal bar. She inwardly cursed herself for being so stupid: of course it looked like a normal bar, why on earth shouldn't it?

'Because it was a gay bar', a little voice kept telling her. What on earth was she, Catherine Willows, doing in a gay bar? This was not her. She had tried it and it hadn't worked; therefore she must be straight. And yet she found herself moving closer to the bar, sitting down, ordering a drink.

"Hi." A voice beside her made her jump. A woman with cropped brown hair sidled to the seat next to her and smiled warmly.

"Hi." Cath repeated, startled.

"I haven't seen you in here before." The woman continued. "What's your name?" A nervous smile twitched at Cath's lips.

"Catherine. My name's Catherine."

X x x

Déjà vu haunted her as she found herself pushed onto an unfamiliar bed as a stranger's hands roamed across her body, lips nipping at her neck.

There had been drinking and there had been talking, and she had stunted memories of a taxi journey. And now Catherine was right back where she had started: trapped by her own confused feelings and without a clue what she was doing.

Her breathing laboured, she grabbed the other woman's hands. It suddenly dawned on her that she couldn't even remember her name.

"I'm sorry." She mumbled, sliding out from beneath her.

"Where are you going?" The brunette asked, struggling to follow her in her inebriated state.

"I'm sorry." Cath repeated, snatching her purse and clearing the stairs in three steps.

Outside; she ran halfway down the road, tears streaming down her face, before finally crashing against a wall, hiccupping sobs wrenching her delicate frame.

**x x x x**

**Any suggestions on the chapter title themes? x  
><strong>


	7. What's love got to do with it?

**theslayer5445 - well done :) And thanks for reviewing x**

**Hope everyone's enjoying so far**

**x x x x**

_**What's love got to do with it?**_

"Catherine!" Grissom shouted, startling the blonde out of her reverie.

"Sorry?" She asked, shaking her head to clear out the cobwebs.

"You have a burglary in Henderson." He held out the case brief to her, scrutinising the woman closely. "Take Sara with you."

"I can manage a burglary on my own." She snapped impertinently.

"I know." Gil shrugged. "Take her anyway." Cath rolled her eyes and snatched the folder from him, stalking out of the room. Sara stood up, sending her supervisor a dirty look.

"Thanks Griss."

X x x

"Should I ask?" She asked after a long period of silence. Catherine flicked her eyes briefly from the road to frown at her.

"What?"

"Whatever's bothering you." Sara sent her a sideways smile. Cath rolled her eyes, turning her attention back to the road.

"You wouldn't understand." She muttered.

"Try me." Sara contradicted calmly. Cath scowled, chewing her lip anxiously. She opened and closed her mouth twice without saying a word.

"Have you ever dated someone who just rattled you?"

"Yeah." Sara chuckled softly. She twisted in her seat, giving Catherine her full attention. "Anyone I know?"

"No." Cath glowered. "Apparently I didn't know them that well either." Something about the way she said it made Sara's heart jump.

"Has someone hurt you?" She asked abruptly, her voice dropping dangerously low. Cath's expression faltered slightly, but she didn't answer straight away; something which only extenuated the sudden dread burning inside Sara. "Catherine, has someone…"

"No." Cath said hurriedly, throwing a quick glance at the brunette. "It's just … things weren't as I thought they were." Sara was quiet for a moment.

"Sometimes it just isn't right." She murmured at last. Catherine chewed the inside of her cheek thoughtfully, sending Sara a sly glance.

"No, I guess not." She agreed quietly.

X x x

Despite her best efforts, she couldn't help but keep replaying Sara's words over in her head.

'Sometimes it just isn't right'. Maybe Nancy was right, she was barking up the wrong tree with the whole lesbian thing.

Unfortunately, now that she had crossed that road she didn't seem able to go back.

Memories of the night before flashed through her subconscious against her every attempt to block them out.

X x x

"_So, you're a cop?"_

"_Crime Scene Examiner." Cath clarified, her gaze hovering longingly over an expensive coat displayed in a window as they drifted down the road. _

"_Ah, right." He nodded, too proud to admit that he didn't know the difference. "So, what do you want to do now?" He directed a cheeky smile towards the pretty woman hanging off his arm. Her lips spread into a shy grin. _

"_Hmm, I don't know. What did you have planned?" _

"_Well, I've got a bottle of wine at home?" He suggested. Catherine's face paled at the mention of wine, the events of earlier in the week still too fresh in her mind. He must have noticed her discomfort because he swiftly backtracked. "I didn't mean it to sound like that, I mean… we don't ... we can go somewhere else if you like, there's…"_

"_It's fine." Cath cut him off with an amused chuckle. "Um, how about coffee?" He smiled. _

"_I have coffee." _

"_Great." She grinned, squeezing his arm tighter. _

X x x

It was meant to be a simple date to help her get her confidence back and put the last few weeks behind her.

Unfortunately, the gods of fate had other plans.

_He moaned, feeling her nails sink into his back as he dropped her unceremoniously onto the bed. However, before he could utter a word she had shoved him roughly aside and was sat on the edge of the bed, gripping the sheets furiously as her breath came in short, sharp bursts. _

"_Cath? Are you okay?" He asked tentatively, reaching out a hand towards her. His fingertips barely grazed her skin and she jumped up, her eyes wide like a deer in the headlights. He leapt back, startled. "I … I'm sorry." _

"_No." She breathed. "No, It's me … I'm sorry." She gulped, suddenly feeling horribly exposed. "I, I need to go." She hurried out of the room before he had chance to argue. _

_By the time he got outside, she was gone. _

X x x

"Cat?" Sara asked timidly. The blonde seemed to have disengaged and Sara was starting to get worried. "Catherine?" Her colleague turned slowly to her, coming back to the present.

"Sorry?" She asked. Sara put down her camera and stood up, walking slowly towards her.

"Are you sure you're okay?" She asked gently.

"I…I'm fine. Really, I just …" she stopped, shaking her head at a loss. "You know, I don't know what's wrong." Sara offered an understanding smile.

"Look, why don't you go home? I can manage this." She gestured to the room. Cath bit her lip anxiously.

"Do you mind?" She asked quietly.

"Of course not." She insisted. "If Grissom asks I'll tell him you weren't feeling well and I told you to go."

Cath smiled, relief washing over her features. "Thank you." There was genuine gratitude in her voice.

As soon as she left she took a deep breath of the cold night air, feeling herself relaxing just a little.

Sara turned back to the room, releasing a sigh. Whoever had done this had certainly been thorough. Picking up her camera she started where she had left off. Could be a long night.

X x x

Catherine felt awful for leaving Sara alone with the scene. But to be honest today she would probably be more of a hindrance than a help. She ran a hand through her hair tiredly as she stalked up the steps to the lab; she figured the least she could do was save Sara from having to cover for her. She threw the glass doors open, nearly knocking Sofia Curtis off her feet in the process.

"Oh, hey." The blonde greeted, surprised. "I thought you were supposed to be with Sara?" she asked with a puzzled frown.

"Yeah, I had to leave." She mumbled, trying to slide around her.

"Is everything okay?" Sofia continued, blocking her path.

"It's fine. I just have something to do." She snapped tiredly, pushing passed her. Sofia watched her go, confounded.

X x x

"Yeah?" Grissom called at the quiet knock. Catherine poked her head around the door nervously. He frowned, dropping his pen. "Catherine? Is everything alright?" He checked his watch.

"Yeah, um, I just wanted to let you know that I – I'm not feeling great so I'm going to head home if that's alright?"

"Yes, of course." He nodded gesturing for her to come in for a moment. "Where's Sara?"

"She's still at the scene. She said she'll be alright processing on her own. Don't worry, there's an officer with her."

"Good." Grissom nodded. "Are … are you okay? I mean, is everything alright with you?" He corrected. "You seem a bit distracted."

"I'm okay." She attempted a weak smile. "I've just got a lot to deal with at the moment."

"Like what?" He sat back in his chair. She took a deep breath; she had hoped he wouldn't ask.

"It's nothing you can help me with." She answered tactfully. He raised an eyebrow.

"You sure about that?"

"Oh, I'm sure." She laughed dryly. "I just have a lot on my mind that I need to work through in my own time. I promise it won't interfere with work again, I just…"

"Take tonight off." Grissom cut her off before she could make up any excuses. "Get some sleep." She released a breath.

"Thank you."

X x x

A part of her felt guilty for leaving Sara and lying to Grissom but she just couldn't sleep right now. Something told her she wasn't going to sleep until she figured this out. Which is precisely why she was here: to figure it out.

Switching off the ignition, she climbed out of the car. Her whole body was shaking with nerves. With a deep breath, she lifted her head and walked into the bar.


	8. Getting there

_**Getting there**_

For a moment she thought her eyes must be lying to her. But no; Catherine Willows was indeed sitting at the bar, drowning her sorrows in a grey goose martini.

Sara contemplated sneaking out before she was spotted, but the blonde just looked so down that she couldn't bring herself to do it. With a sigh, she ditched her pool cue and ambled through the crowd.

"Hey you." She greeted nonchalantly, sliding into a seat beside her. Catherine had to do a double take to make sure she wasn't seeing things. She cast a sly glance over her shoulder to where Sara's motley crew of friends were eyeing them suspiciously.

"What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing." Sara signalled to the bartender to bring her a drink.

"Honestly, I have no idea." Cath answered morosely, idly mixing her drink with a cocktail stick. She turned to Sara, resting her elbow on the edge of the bar. "You come here often?"

"Yeah." Sara shrugged. "I like it here." She accepted her beer, taking a long sip. Putting it back down, she toyed with the label, studiously avoiding Cath's curious gaze. "I thought you knew."

"I didn't." Catherine said softly. She continued to stir her drink sadly, staring into the bottom of the glass. Sara risked a glance over and studied her colleague's demeanour.

"Something you want to talk about?" She asked gently, receiving little more than a shrug in response. Well aware of her friends still observing from afar, Sara reached over and carefully prised the glass out of her hands, interlocking their fingers.

"Let's go for a walk."

X x x

"I just felt like I was stringing her along. I wasn't, but I …" she gave up trying to explain, throwing her hands up helplessly.

"Catherine, no one has any right to try to force you." Sara said, trying to keep the anger out of her voice. "What you're going through is enough to drive anyone crazy; you can't rush into anything." Cath looked away, stuffing her hands in the pockets as they ambled down the lonely street. When she didn't answer, Sara continued. "Cat, how long have you been going to Blue?"

"Since I broke up with Lorna." Cath shrugged. "About two weeks. I thought it might help me sort my head out." Sara shook her head, a soft frown on her face.

"Honey, picking up strange women in bars is not going to help." She said gently. "Whatever's going on in your head, you need to work through it first before you dive into bed with someone. Otherwise you will freak out."

"Yeah, I know; you're right." Cath admitted. "I just don't know what's wrong with me!" She moaned pitifully. "Every time I'm with someone it gets so far and I just, I freeze up. I don't know what it is."

"Nothing's wrong with you." Sara chuckled softly, offering a sympathetic smile.

"And then the other day I was with a guy – same thing happened!" She continued oblivious to Sara's comment, waving her hands dramatically. "I can't let anyone near me anymore. I'm a fucking mess!"

"You're not a mess. You're just confused." Cath scoffed. "You know, I've known that something was bothering you for a while, but I never would have guessed it was this."

"Yeah, me neither." Catherine laughed dryly. "I don't know what to do, Sara."

"You don't have to do anything if you don't want to." Sara offered sensitively. "But take it from someone who's been there: whatever you're feeling, it's not going to go away no matter how much you ignore it."

X x x

Catherine smiled when, upon entering the locker room, her gaze fell on the lone occupant.

"Hey you." She echoed Sara's earlier words. The brunette looked up and smiled warmly. Checking that they truly were alone, Cath stepped closer to her, leaning against the lockers. "Thank you, for earlier." She said sincerely. "You really helped me, just sort my head out."

"Sometimes it just helps to talk these things out." Sara said quietly. Cath nodded, her eyes shifting up to meet her companion's gaze.

"Sometimes you just need someone to talk to." They shared a small smile. Inching closer, Cath tentatively wrapped Sara in a hug, relief sweeping over her when she felt the younger woman's arms enfold her.

The tender moment was interrupted by a loud wolf whistle as the rabble entered.

"Evening girls." Nick grinned. "Not interrupting anything are we?"

"No." Cath stuck her tongue out, releasing Sara.

"Hey, you ladies up for breakfast after shift?" Warrick asked, sauntering in behind the Texan.

"What's the occasion?" She asked, moving over to her own locker and starting to get ready for work.

"Nicky here nailed the Matheson case."

"The trial went well then?" Sara assumed, recalling seeing Nick in his court suit yesterday.

"Hell yeah. So, breakfast? I'm buying." Nick raised his eyebrows hopefully.

"Sure, I'm in." Sara nodded.

"Yeah, me too." Cath agreed.

"Alright!" Nicky grinned, patting Sara on the arm and sending Catherine a wide grin. "That was easy. Who wants to get Grissom on side?"

X x x

"Well, I am stuffed." Nick smirked, leaning back and patting his stomach proudly.

"I'm not surprised. You must have eaten an entire pig, the amount of bacon in that sandwich." Warrick teased.

"It was a good sandwich." Nick smiled, licking his lips. The team shared a giggle at his obvious enjoyment. Greg stifled a yawn.

"Well, thanks for breakfast Nick, but I think its bed time." He stood up and stretched.

"Yeah, I'm with you." Warrick agreed. "Coming bacon boy?" The guys all climbed out of the booth to a chorus of clicking joints and muscles. "Damn, we're getting old!"

"Speak for yourself." Cath chimed in dryly. The guys chuckled, slipping their coats on.

"You're not coming?" Grissom asked, noting that the women hadn't moved.

"In a few minutes." Cath gestured to her half-empty cup of coffee. Truth be told, it had gone cold ten minutes ago, but she had another reason for staying behind.

"Alright, have a good day girls." Nick waved, sailing out with a chattering Warrick and a sleepy Greg. Grissom sent a suspicious look back at the girls before following them out.

Alone, Catherine let her false smile fade and turned to her companion.

"Sara, thanks again for yesterday." She said softly.

"Don't mention it." Sara smiled, downing the last of her drink.

"Seriously, it meant a lot." The blonde looked away shyly. "I've never told anyone that stuff before." She confessed softly. Sara sat forward, reaching a hand across the table.

"If ever you need to talk, you know where I am." There was a moment of companionable silence before Catherine spoke again.

"I thought about what you said." Sara looked up, attempting to meet her gaze.

"And?" She pressed softly. Cath took a deep breath.

"And, you're right. Whatever this is, it's not going away." She ran a hand through her hair, a perplexed frown on her face. "I just don't know what to do about it."

"Don't try to force it." Sara said, resting her hand on Cath's. "Whatever's going to happen just let it happen." Catherine looked up, a small smile twitching at her lips.

"You know, you're better than you think at this." Sara blinked, not following. Catherine laughed at her baffled expression; she realised it was the first time she had felt genuinely relaxed for the first time in too long. She stood up and leant across the table, placing a kiss on Sara's cheek. "Thank you."

"You're welcome?" Sara mumbled with a bemused smile, watching her sashay out of the diner.


	9. Friends and Enemies

**This one's a bit longer. There is a reason I am introducing the 'friends' now, they will be back :) **

**Hope you like, let me know what you think **

**KC x  
><strong>

**x x x x**

**_Friends and Enemies_**

"I can't believe she's nearly a month old already." Laura cooed over the buggy. "She's growing so fast."

"Tell me about it." Karen laughed, flicking her blonde hair over her shoulder. Cath couldn't help but think she looked far too good for someone who had given birth less than four weeks ago.

"How's David coping with another one?" Deborah asked, taking a long sip of her iced cappuccino. Karen laughed, shaking her head.

"He's dodging diaper duty like a pro."

"Men always do." Laura rolled her eyes. "It must be an inbuilt sensor in them. James used to suddenly remember some law journal he needed to look for every time Rebecca or Matthew needed changing."

"Michael's the same. As soon as someone needed changing he was like a ghost: out of sight." Deborah chimed in. They all fell quiet, waiting. Catherine was the rebel of the group – the divorcee, and even though they knew that she would never mention Eddie in their presence, it was like they felt the need to test her with their silence anyway.

"So, what's going on with you?" Laura asked at last, turning to the strawberry blonde. "You look … better." Cath smiled tightly. That was a polite way of saying that last time they saw her she looked like hell. Which, to be fair was probably true, but it didn't make her feel any better about it.

"I'm good. I've just had a lot going on recently." She said.

"Oh, I know what you mean." Deborah jumped in. "I've finally convinced Michael to redecorate the living room. The place is a tip!" Everyone laughed nodding in sympathy, and the conversation was swiftly moved on. As Debs promptly produced several paint samples and the others ooh-ed and ah-ed over them, Catherine sat back in her chair and observed her friends for a moment.

It had recently struck her just how artificial her friends' lives were. If taken at face value, it appeared none of them had any issues. If the conversation started to get the slightest bit deep or personal then it was quickly diverted onto fashion or social activities of the children or some other safe topic.

Like carpet colours.

She wondered absently whether any of her friends had a skeleton in their five-square-foot walk-in closets. She wondered whether there would be room for a skeleton amongst the rows of Armani suits and Dolce & Gabbana outfits.

It was never spoken, but everyone knew that the only reason Cath had a place in this group was her connections. She had a rich father and a potential stake in a casino; that qualified her to be part of their middle-class, exclusive tight-knit little circle. After all, she didn't exactly fit in with their perfect 'women with it all' faction.

Let's start with the ring leader. Laura Hamley was married to James, a successful lawyer (a slimy one at that, Catherine had learnt from personal experience). She had two children who had been speaking French since they were two ("you have to start early or you miss that vital age for learning" Laura had explained). Rebecca was in ballet with Lindsey, as well as gymnastics twice a week and piano every Wednesday. Matthew, at the tender age of four, was already in a peewee softball team and would be joining a karate club as soon as he was old enough.

Deborah was the career woman. With two 'perfect' little boys, she was the epitome of the 'have it all' woman: she had stay-at-home-husband Michael who wrote his sports article between school runs and football games while she managed her accountancy firm.

And finally Karen, the 'yummy mummy'. The stereotypical middle-class woman with two point three children, a figure to die for and a business executive husband in the form of David, a younger guy with a swimmer's body. She split her time between school, nursery, the salon and a seemingly endless cycle of after-school activities.

In comparison, Catherine was the divorced ex-stripper running on four hours sleep a night with a young daughter who she barely saw. Not to mention a secret to die for …

The baby whimpered, disrupted her thoughts. Karen reached into the $1000 Bugaboo cameleon stroller beside her and lifted the squirming baby out.

"She is gorgeous." Cath smiled, reaching out to hold her tiny hand. Karen rummaged in her bag, finally producing a bottle and dropping it into the little girl's mouth. Cath blinked. "Oh, you're not nursing?" she asked, surprised.

"Ha, no chance." Karen looked at her like she'd gone mad. "Do you have any idea how many hours it would take at the gym to get these back!" She laughed heartily, joined merrily by the others.

"You know, I've heard some scientists are even saying that breast feeding doesn't make a difference in intelligence or health. It's just something the government says to increase rates." Deborah piped up proudly with her knowledge of recent politics.

And once again, Catherine slipped out of the conversation.

These women were her closest friends outside work. Who was she kidding; they were her only friends outside work.  
>But increasingly so, she couldn't work out for the life of her why they were her friends.<p>

X x x

"Hey." Sara smiled warmly, slipping her coat off as she entered the locker room.

"Hi." Cath's face brightened. "How are you?"

"I'm good." Sara nodded. "You?"

"Yeah, I'm – I'm good." She agreed with a soft smile.

"And about … are you still?" Sara asked, hurriedly ensuring they were alone.

"No." Cath shook her head, lowering herself onto the bench. "No, I um, I thought I'd take a break from the bar scene. Just … get my head together." Sara smiled.

"Good. That's good." She nodded, something akin to relief in her voice.

"You know, I couldn't have done it without you." Catherine mumbled shyly, looking up at Sara from beneath her lashes. "You really helped me." She could have sworn that she saw Sara blush at the comment before murmuring a bashful response.

X x x

"I won't ask you again, Mr Timpson." Catherine snapped tiredly, getting fed up of this joker's games. His only response was a smug smirk; he was rattling her and he knew it. "Did you meet this woman yesterday?"

"I thought you weren't going to ask me again." He pointed out arrogantly. She rolled her eyes, tossing her pen down.

"Alright…"

"Cat." Sara's voice interrupted softly, poking her head into the interrogation room. At her nod Catherine moved over to the door. "We've got the warrant; Nick and I are going to search his car now while it's outside."

"Okay, I'll keep him talking as long as I can."

The suspect looked the new woman up and down appreciatively, eyeing her interactions with the blonde CSI. He watched as the brunette's hand barely grazed the other woman's arm before she slipped back outside.

As Catherine sat back down and reclaimed her pen, scribbling something in her notebook, he rolled his eyes.

"Dykes." He muttered under his breath. Cath's hand froze mid-sentence. Her gaze flicked up to meet his.

"What did you just say?" She asked darkly. His lips turned into a sneer.

"Dykes." He repeated sardonically, leaning forward in his seat. Before she knew what had happened he recoiled, clutching the side of his face. Her hand throbbed, still poised in midair. His face contorted into an expression of rage, a bright red handprint forming on his cheek. "Bitch!" He yelled, launching himself at the blonde.

The police officer leapt at him, throwing him roughly against the wall, but not before he managed to shove Catherine forcefully into the one-way window.

Grissom jumped, wincing at the crack her head made as it collided with the glass. Startled, he turned to Brass, who had already burst into the interrogation room.

"Get him out of here!" The detective barked at the uniform, crouching down where Catherine had landed. "It's okay." He hushed her when she whimpered, feeling hot blood trickling down her forehead.

X x x

She heard the commotion from down the hall. Peering around the corner, she was surprised to see the suspect being forcefully dragged down the corridor by two officers. An uneasy feeling planted itself in the pit of her stomach.

She flew into the room like a bat out of hell, tore straight passed a startled Grissom and skidded to a halt on her knees beside Catherine. Brass blinked at her, taken aback by her abrupt entrance.

"What happened?" She demanded, gripping Catherine's hand. The blonde looked up at her with frantic blue eyes.

"Sara?" She squeaked, squeezing her hand.

"It's okay; you're going to be alright." The younger woman assured.

"Doc Robbins is on his way to check you out." Grissom said, snapping his phone shut.

"See, you're going to be fine." Sara promised. As Jim helped her slowly into a chair, Grissom pulled Sara aside. "What happened?" She asked again.

"She lashed out at the suspect." Grissom explained, keeping one eye trained on his injured colleague.

"_She_ lashed out?" Sara repeated, surprised.

"Yeah." Grissom sounded just as baffled as she did. "He said something that I didn't hear, and then she slapped him. And he hit her." Sara frowned, perplexed by this turn of events. However, before they could even attempt to make any sense of it, the door swung open and the familiar sound of Doc's cane clicking on the floor echoed off the walls.

"What happened?" He barked, making a beeline for the injured CSI.

"She hit her head." Brass answered concisely, stepping aside.

"I'm okay." Cath said in a shaky voice, her hands pinned between her legs in a failed attempt to disguise their trembling. After carefully brushing her hair aside and examining the shallow wound, he straightened up.

"It doesn't look too serious." Everyone released the breath they had been holding. "I'd still suggest getting it checked at the hospital just to be on the safe side."

"No!" Catherine insisted. "I'll be fine."

"Catherine…"

"I'm alright." She cut him off, her voice slightly firmer now.

Everyone exchanged a silent look of concern over her head, one which she chose to ignore as she attempted to stand up. Jim and Albert both reached out to stop her movements.

"Alright, alright." Jim said, holding her still with a firm hand on her shoulder. "How about if you let Al take a proper look and then if he still thinks you're alright we'll get you home?" he bargained gently. Catherine seemed to think about this for a moment, although really she knew that she didn't have a choice: it was that or the hospital.

"I'll take her home." Sara offered instantly, a worried frown marring her features.

"Okay." Brass and Grissom both nodded and mumbled their consent as they all filed out to afford them some privacy.

X x x

"If anything seems off to you, get her to a hospital straight away." Doc instructed, effectively handing Catherine over to Sara's care.

"I'm fine." Cath said through gritted teeth. Having calmed down a little from the initial shock, she was left shaken with a smashing headache and a fresh bandage taped to her head.

"I'll take care of her." Sara promised with a small smile, wrapping an arm protectively around her friend's waist.

Catherine didn't say it out loud, but she was glad it was Sara taking her home.

Her head hurt too much to work out exactly what had happened at the moment, but when she did she knew that Sara was the only one who would understand why she had done it.


	10. Crush

**_Crush_**

Catherine awoke – her memory of the night before blurred and hazy – with an almighty headache. Her first thought was hangover, until she ran her hand through her unruly hair and winced as her fingertips grazed the bump on her head.

The events of the night before rushed into her memory and she cringed. She had slapped a suspect! Something told her that she was going to feel some repercussions for that today. As she climbed off the bed, tying her bathrobe around her loosely, she attempted to recall what had happened after that but all she could conjure were fuzzy images of her colleagues flitting around her.

She stumbled her way downstairs, squinting against the bright light streaming through the landing window. As she staggered into the lounge a regretful smile graced her bruised face.

"Oh." She sighed softly. She remembered now.

Sara was curled up on the couch, one arm tucked beneath her head, her face peaceful with sleep. Creeping quietly so as not to wake her, Catherine approached the couch and carefully draped a blanket across the dozing girl. She resisted brushing her hair aside, not daring to touch her in case she woke her.

Instead, she poured herself a cup of coffee, curled herself comfortably in a chair and contented herself with watching her friend sleep.

X x x

Sara stirred, scrunching her eyes tightly closed. She heard a soft chuckle from somewhere nearby and her dark eyes flew open, searching the unfamiliar room, eventually settling on Catherine who was smirking at her from her spot in the armchair.

"Morning." The blonde greeted. Sara bolted upright a little too fast, making the room spin.

"Morning, how – how are you?" She stuttered, trying to regain her vision.

"I'm … probably in trouble." Cath decided at last. Sara hid a smile.

"Maybe." She conceded. "I meant…" she tapped her head lightly. Cath instinctively reached up to her wound and winced.

"It's sore." She stated. "You stayed all night?" Sara shrugged, folding up the blanket.

"I didn't want to leave you alone." She mumbled. Cath's face broke out in a wide smile, even though it hurt to do so.

"Thank you. I appreciate it." She nodded gratefully. She gestured to the kitchen behind them. "Breakfast?"

"Thanks, but I should probably go." Sara stood up and stretched. Cath stood up too, plastering a hopeful look on her face.

"Please stay, it's the least I can do." She added a small pout for good measure and it seemed to do the trick as Sara's lips twitched into a smile.

X x x

Catherine could feel several pairs of eyes on her but she kept her gaze fixed firmly on the ground, until she heard familiar voices.

"There she is." She heard someone say before three people materialised in front of her. As soon as she lifted her head their eyes simultaneously widened.

"What happened to you?" Deborah asked, reaching up to point at the bruise marring her face. Cath moved swiftly away from her hand before she could poke the tender area.

"It's nothing; there was an incident at work." She attempted to shrug it off. "Dissatisfied customer." She joked.

"Well I hope you got the night off for it." Laura sniffed, affronted. Cath laughed.

"I did actually, a colleague took me home. She even stayed on the couch so she could keep an eye on me." A soft smile graced her lips as she recalled finding her there.

"I'd be wanting danger pay." Karen huffed bluntly.

"Pity it wasn't Warrick…" Laura smirked, nudging Cath playfully in the ribs. "Bet you wouldn't have made him sleep on the couch." The strawberry blonde chewed her lip, having an internal debate as to how to answer that. However, judging by the smug look passing between her friends they had taken her nervous silence to mean something else entirely."

"See, I was right…" Laura pointed at her pink cheeks gleefully. Thankfully, before she could continue her mocking they were cut off as the first rabble of children emerged from the school, along with a young female teacher.

"God, I cannot believe they allow her to work with kids." Karen said, disgusted. Catherine frowned, not following.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"You don't know?" Debs asked as they all leant in conspiratorially. "She's gay."

"And?" Catherine pressed, still confused. They all blinked at her.

"Well, it's not right." Karen explained as if it were obvious. "I was thinking of putting in a petition to get her sacked.

"What?" Cath barked, shocked. She could feel herself getting hot beneath her very skin.

"I'll talk to James, I'm sure he has some contacts who could argue the case to get her removed." Laura continued, ignoring the CSI's reaction. "She could be out by the end of the month."

"Why are you trying to get her sacked?" Cath jumped in, perhaps a little too loudly because a few other parents started to send them odd looks.

"Well, I for one don't want my kids around someone like that." Laura said with a scowl.

"It's not contagious you know." Cath pointed out bluntly.

"Yeah well, I don't want to risk it. Who knows what she might be teaching them."

Snapping, Catherine opened her mouth to speak. What came out surprised even herself.

"Did you know they're planning on building a mosque on this road?" The words came out so easily, she could have believed them herself.

"What?" Her friends asked in unison, the previous conversation already forgotten with the latest threat to their perfect white-middle-class habitat. "They can't do that! Can they?"

"James will look into it. It won't even get as far as planning permission." Laura said adamantly.

"Oh I think it's already been passed. I think it's due to start building in the next couple of months." Cath continued, shocking herself by how easily she carried the lie. She had to admit, the feeling of power was like a high, but the taste of vengeance was bitter.

"No way." Karen gasped, horrified.

Their frantic conversation was interrupted by the sound of approaching little feet.

"Mommy!" Lindsey squealed, throwing her little arms around Cath's middle. Catherine placed a hand on her daughter's head, her eyes still firmly locked with Laura's.

"Hey baby." She greeted. Her friend's kids all followed suit, discarding bags and lunchboxes into their parents. Not wanting to spend any longer in their presence, Cath look Lindsey's hand. "Come on, we've got to go."

"You're not coming to the park?" Karen asked, attempting to tidy her daughter's hair while her son was pestering her for attention.

"Not today." Cath answered coldly, leading Lindsey away from the group. They watched her go with confusion.

"What's her problem?" Debs asked, oblivious to her sons scrapping beside her.

"That bump on the head must have damaged some brain cells." Laura joked, although she was not entirely sure of the answer herself.

When Catherine reached the school gates she turned, catching Laura's gaze for just a moment; and the woman could have sworn she saw something akin to regret in her blue eyes.

X x x

Cath smiled warmly as the car pulled up outside. Since her own was still at the lab, Sara had offered to pick her up.

Kissing Lindsey goodbye and assuring Nancy that she would be more careful tonight, she practically skipped down the drive and clambered into the car.

"Hey you." She grinned. "Thank you for this."

"No problem." Sara promised, turning the radio down so they could talk. "You feeling any better?"

"A little." Cath shrugged. They travelled in silence for a few minutes before Cath finally had the guts to broach the subject that had been bugging her all afternoon. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

"Sure." Sara cast a quick glance at her before turning her attention back to the road.

"How did you tell your friends? That you were … you know." Sara chewed on the inside of her cheek thoughtfully.

"To be honest most of them found out on their own." She answered at last.

"And they were okay with it?"

"The ones that are still my friends were okay with it." She flashed the blonde a grin. Cath laughed nervously.

"Some weren't, then?" As they pulled up at a red light Sara turned in her seat to face Cath.

"Has someone said something?" She asked softly.

"No." Cath sulked. "Well, not about me." She took a deep breath. "I just don't think my friends will be too receptive to the idea. They're not the most open-minded of people."

"Well then maybe you need new friends." Sara replied bluntly, setting off as the light changed. Cath nodded thoughtfully.

"Yeah. Maybe."

X x x

Her chat with Sara in the car had helped a little, but not much.

However, she had since developed bigger things on her mind than her obnoxious friends. She had assumed the reason she could talk to Sara about this was because she understood it. But replaying the scene this morning over in her mind, she couldn't help remembering the fluttering in her stomach at the thought that Sara had put her to bed, that she'd sat up with her half the night.

That she'd stayed.

She wasn't sure that it meant anything yet, but at the same time she wasn't convinced that it was purely platonic.

As the shift wore on, she managed to convince herself more and more that there was something there. The one thing she couldn't tell was whether Sara would reciprocate or not.

Deciding that there was only one way to find out, she made up her mind: she was going to ask Sara to dinner.

If the brunette said no, there was her answer. However, if she said yes and it went well then she would ask her outright how she felt.

Simple…

X x x

It was only when her pager beeped that she realised what time it was – she had been wearing a hole in her office floor for the better part of an hour. Ignoring her message from Hodges, she psyched herself up and stalked into the hallway.

She got three steps from the locker room and her heart skipped a beat when she heard the brunette's voice inside. However, she wasn't alone.

"No one needs to know." Sofia Curtis. Cath rolled her eyes, mentally cursing the gods; of all the people in the world.

"I know." Sara sniffled softly. Was she crying? Cath stepped closer, ensuring she remained out of sight. Luckily it was after shift change and most people had already filtered off so there was no one around to question her odd behaviour.

"I know everything's up in the air at the moment but it's going to be okay." She heard Sofia assuring Sara. Catherine peered around the door frame and what she saw made her heart sink. Sara was wrapped in Sofia's embrace, her whole body trembling.

"I'm sorry." She heard Sara whimper. "I'm sorry, I just don't know if I'm ready for people to know about this yet." Sofia dropped a kiss into her hair.

"It's okay hon." She promised. Hon? "We can wait as long as you need. There's no rush."

Catherine could practically feel her heart crack. A part of her wanted to walk in there and pull the detective off of her girl.  
>But she didn't.<p>

She turned and walked down the deserted hallway, crushed.

**x x x x**

**let me know what you think x**


	11. The Secret

_**The Secret**_

Catherine was already in a bad mood when she arrived at work and it didn't look set to improve when the first thing she saw upon pulling into the parking lot was Sara and Sofia sat on the concrete steps outside the lab. Rolling her eyes, Cath slammed her car door shut and stalked past them.

"Evening." She greeted curtly, purposefully avoiding all eye contact.

"Hey." Sofia responded. Sara didn't say anything, her gaze fixed firmly on the ground. Not that Catherine had stuck around to long enough to see whether they had answered anyway.

She had been thinking about it all day and had come to the conclusion that her only choice was to avoid the brunette. She was not angry with Sara; after all she had the right to date whoever she wanted.

She was angry with Sofia.

X x x

It seemed that she was not the only one who was aware of something going on between the detective and the CSI.

As Catherine drifted down the hall later that night she caught a glimpse of Sofia in Grissom's office. She stopped, hovering outside for a moment. She was too far away to hear what was being said but it appeared to be a very serious conversation.

Grissom was perched on the edge of the desk and Sofia was stood in front of him, her hands submerged in her pockets. Though she couldn't see Sofia's face, Cath had a clear view of Grissom's expression: his blue eyes glistened with badly disguised sadness. Inching closer, she could just about catch what they were talking about.

"I'm sorry: Sara didn't want me to tell you, but I thought you should know." Sofia said gently.

"No, it's okay. I'm glad you told me." Grissom assured her.

"I don't know if there's anything you need to do…"

"I'll deal with it." He cut her off softly.

"Hey Cath." A suspicious voice spoke from behind her, making her jump.

"Nicky." She hissed, "Don't do that to me."

"What are you doing?" He continued, peering around her into Grissom's office.

"Uh, I needed to talk to Gil." She answered hurriedly, thinking on her feet. "But Sofia's in there and I didn't want to interrupt, it looked quite serious." Nick's expression morphed into one she couldn't quite read. "What?" She asked apprehensively.

"I think it might be about Sara." He said, pulling her aside so they were well out of earshot. "Sara got upset at a crime scene this morning and took off outside. The next time I saw her she was with Sofia and whatever they were talking about seemed to be pretty intense."

"Yeah?" Cath asked, quirking an eyebrow. For a moment she considered telling the Texan what she had heard in the locker room, but by the sounds of things it wasn't something Sara wanted making public knowledge. Personally Cath couldn't give a damn about Sofia, but her loyalty to Sara won out and she kept her mouth shut.

X x x

"Oh no." Cath muttered under her breath when she arrived at the locker room and saw the only other occupant sitting lonely on the bench. Clamping down on the surge of butterflies in her stomach, she walked in and strutted straight to her locker.

"Hi." Sara greeted quietly.

"Hey." Cath replied, keeping her back to her colleague.

"I'm sorry I've been a bit all over the place today." Sara mumbled, staring into her lap. "I just have something I'm dealing with."

"It's fine." Cath answered coldly, refusing to meet her gaze. Sara lifted her head, a soft frown on her face at the blonde's response.

"Okay." She said uncertainly, wiping subtly at her eyes. "How are things with you?"

"Everything's fine." Catherine said, slamming her locker a little too harshly. She turned, catching a glimpse of the brunette's face. She looked so sad it made her heart melt.  
>Catherine desperately wanted to wrap her arms around her and tell her that everything would be okay. To kiss her and promise that she was safe and loved. She wanted to repay her for being there for her.<p>

But she didn't; she couldn't.

Instead, she slipped into her coat and stalked out, leaving Sara alone and lost.

X x x

"There you go." Nancy said, placing the mug in front of her sister. "You look like you need it."

"Thank you." Cath said blankly, accepting the coffee.

"Why _are_ you so tired?" Nance pressed, sitting down opposite her. It was one of the rarer mornings when they were meeting at her's rather than Catherine's. The strawberry-blonde's only response to the question was a yawn. As she threw her head back Nancy caught a glance of something on her neck and her eyes widened. "Is that a hickey?"

Cath's hand flew to her throat, her cheeks turning pink.

"No." she said slowly.

"Oh my God." Nancy rolled her eyes impatiently. "You were at that damn bar again." She realised. "I thought you'd finished with all of that."

"I'm not 'finished' with anything. I just ... don't know what I want." Catherine clarified sullenly.

"Cathy." Nancy pressed in her parental voice. Under the unwavering glare of her blue eyes, Cath cracked.

"Alright, so maybe I do know. But I can't have it."

"But you're willing to settle for a random stranger instead; well, that's comforting." Nancy droned sarcastically. Cath sent her sister a frustrated look.

"Nance, I need to figure this out. Can you please just let me do that in my own way?"

"Okay, fine." Nancy held up her hands defensively. "But just so you know I can see this ending in tears."

"Subject closed." Catherine said sternly, leaning back with her cup of coffee to emphasise her point. "What's going on with you anyway?" She asked, suavely changing subject.

"Well; my son's failing maths, my husband just bought a car we can't afford and my sister's a lesbian." The younger woman listed coolly, stirring her drink.

"You know what, forget it." Cath rolled her eyes, pushing herself away from the table. "Lindsey!" She hollered into the lounge. "We have to go."

"Catherine," Nancy called her back before she could walk out. "In all seriousness, please don't go back there. At least not until you know what you want." Cath chewed her lip for a moment.

"I'll call you tomorrow." She said at last, disappearing into the hallway. Nancy dropped back down into her seat despondently.

"I just don't know what I'm going to do with you." She muttered flippantly.

X x x

Finally alone, Catherine sank heavily into a chair. It had been a long day to say the least. With Lindsey in bed and her mother not there to babysit yet, the house seemed too quiet.

Her eyes flicked to the phone, chewing on her bottom lip anxiously. There was only one person who she wanted to talk to right now. In the back of her mind, she wondered what Sara would be doing; but she quickly pushed the thought aside.

If Sofia had anything to do with it then she didn't want to know.

With a sigh she pushed herself off the chair and sloped upstairs. Creeping into Lindsey's room, she knelt down beside the bed and stroked her daughter's soft hair.

"My baby." She whispered. She might not have everything she wanted, but at least she knew the most important thing in her life wasn't going anywhere.


	12. Misunderstood

_**Misunderstood**_

"Nick just called from the hospital. The victim is in recovery now and doing well." Sara announced, wandering back into the house.

"Good." Sofia responded. "I'll head over there to take their statement when we're done here."

"Okay." Sara nodded. "Where do you want me start?" The question was directed at Catherine, but the strawberry blonde opted not to answer. After a whole minute of silence, Sara exchanged a puzzled look with Sofia. "Should I start upstairs?" She suggested tentatively.

"Sure." Cath answered bluntly, continuing to powder the window frame.

"Okay." The younger CSI nodded, picking up her case.

"I'll come with you." Sofia said, making for the stairs.

"She can manage on her own." Catherine snapped. Sara and Sofia shared a look and the brunette set off alone. The detective stalked across the room, her hands on her hips.

"Okay. What's your problem?" She asked, keeping her voice low.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Cath said calmly, walking around her and pretending to look in her case for something.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about. You've been acting out all week." Sofia called her out, stalking her around the room.

"Just leave it, Curtis." Cath huffed sullenly.

"No. We all have problems but you don't bring them to work; and you certainly don't take it out on your colleagues."

"Oh shut up!" Catherine slammed her crime scene case shut and strutted towards the door. "You have no fucking idea." She muttered as she stomped outside.

X x x

"Hey!" Sofia hollered across the yard, attracting the attention of a few nearby officers. "What the hell was that about?"

"Just leave it." Cath snapped, coming to a halt at the end of the driveway.

"No, I won't." Sofia insisted, swinging around to face her. "What's got up your ass today?"

"I said leave it." Catherine said though gritted teeth.

"Look, I don't care if you're having a bad day, you have no right to speak to her like that!" Sofia yelled angrily. Cath's eye's narrowed, lowering her voice.

"Oh very noble, jumping to her defence. What, do you think she's going to thank you for it later?" She spat petulantly.

"What?" Sofia asked, perplexed.

"How long has it been going on? The two of you." Catherine continued, ignoring the blatant looks they were receiving from the uniformed spectators now. Sofia held up her hands, lowering her voice.

"Look, I don't know what you think you know, but you're wrong." Cath scoffed but Sofia chose to ignore it. "Just back off of Sara, okay." The detective started to walk away but – naturally – Catherine couldn't let her have the last word.

"Sara's perfectly capable of taking care of herself. She doesn't need someone to be her bodyguard."

Sofia stopped, keeping her back to the irate CSI. "You don't know what Sara needs right now."

"I know Sara a damn sight better than you do!" Cath yelled, spinning around on her heel. Slowly, Sofia turned to face her. Her expression was blank but her eyes shone with anger. When she spoke her voice was low, angry and cut through Catherine like a knife.

"Her mom tried to kill herself two days ago."

She turned and walked back into the house, leaving Catherine alone in shock.

X x x

"Hey." Sara lifted her head, offering a sad smile in greeting. Catherine walked further into the locker room, lowering herself onto the bench beside her friend. "Look, I'm sorry I've been a bit on edge these last few days." She offered quietly. "I guess I've just had a lot on my mind."

"It's fine." Sara shrugged, toying with a loose thread on her sleeve. Since leaving the crime scene she had been avoiding eye contact with the blonde. Not that she could blame her.

"No, it's not." Cath shook her head. "Honey, Sofia told me what happened." Sara looked up, surprise playing briefly across her face before understanding sank in.

"Of course she did." Sara laughed dryly. Cath reached out, interlocking their hands.

"Why didn't _you_ tell me?"

"You just said it yourself – you have enough to deal with without me offloading my drama onto you"

"But honey; your mom!" Sara shrugged, keeping her gaze averted. Cath squeezed her hand, using her free one to tuck a stray brunette curl behind Sara's ear. "I'm sorry. I should have paid more attention."

"It's okay."

"Don't do that, Sara." She chastised softly. "You've been there for me so much recently and I just ignored you when you needed someone most. I should have supported you." She sighed sadly. "How is your mom?"

"She's okay." Sara mumbled. "I'm getting a flight out tomorrow."

"Good. That's good." Cath nodded, biting her tongue for a moment, resisting the urge to ask. "Is Sofia going with you?"

"No." Sara frowned, puzzled. "Why would she?"

"I just thought…never mind." Cath shrugged. "I guess it's not that serious yet." Sara's expression changed as the penny dropped.

"You don't think…" she stopped, raising an eyebrow. Cath's face fell.

"No…" She said unconvincingly. Despite the blonde's uncomfortable expression, Sara couldn't help but laugh. "So, you and her, you're not…"

"No." Sara said, highly amused.

"And Sofia's not..."

"Not to the best of my knowledge." Sara shook her head, still attempting to hide her giggles. Catherine laughed, shaking her head.

"Wow. Well, I feel stupid." She confessed. Sara smiled sympathetically despite her immense enjoyment.

"Is that what's been bothering you?" She guessed correctly. Cath chewed the inside of her cheek nervously.

"Maybe." She mumbled. When Sara sent her a dubious look she cracked. "Alright yes. I guess I was jealous." She admitted ashamedly. "I thought you would at least tell me something like that."

"I would have." Sara promised. Cath smiled appreciatively.

"Thanks. I was just thrown when you and her suddenly became so close. Why did you tell her and not me?" Try as she might, she couldn't keep the hurt out of her voice.

"I didn't. She walked in on me when I'd just received the phone call. Considering the state I was in, I didn't really have much choice but to tell her."

"Oh." Cath nodded, falling silent for a moment. It dawned on her that had she not been procrastinating in her office, she would probably have been the one to find her after that phonecall. "So, you're not seeing anyone…?"

"No." Sara smiled, sensing where this was going.

"Okay." Catherine nodded slowly. "Then, would you like to have dinner with me sometime?"

"I would like that." Sara replied, standing up.

"That's it?" Cath blinked, surprised.

"Yeah." Sara smiled and kissed her cheek. Cath sighed softly, shaking her head as she watched Sara sashay out of the room.

"I'm going to have fun with you, aren't ?"

**x x x x**

**| :)  
>V<br>**


	13. In the Mood for Love

**Hey guys :) Thanks for reading and reviewing so far, hope you're liking the updates. This one is light and fluffy, since I'm in a christmassy mood :)) **

**The dress Catherine is wearing does actually exist, it is based on a Joe Browns dress. Also, as far as my research assures me, there is a rooftop restaurant in The Palms, although feel free to correct me if I am mistaken. **

**Anyways, enjoy!**

**x x x x**

_**In the Mood for Love**_

Catherine checked her watch for the tenth time in as many minutes. She was too nervous for words; she hated not knowing what was going on and right now she couldn't predict what was going to happen…

Sara was due back tonight.

Catherine still didn't know the full story behind what had happened with her mother, and therefore she wasn't sure what sort of state Sara might be in when she got back. One thing she did know, however, was the longer Sara was away the more nervous she got.  
>It was not just the issue of Sara's mom that was bothering her. Despite the fact that the anti-social brunette had agreed to go out with her, Cath still didn't know where they stood. That was the last time she had spoken to her before she left for California and, as such things felt very up in the air and it was making her anxious.<p>

Which is why she was pacing. It was why she had been pacing for a good fifteen minutes. She got to the end of the locker room and spun on her heel, her gaze instantly settling on a pair of warm brown eyes.

"Hey." She greeted with a relieved sigh. "How are you?" She walked over and kissed her cheek lightly. "How's your mom?"

"She's doing alright," Sara nodded, tossing her bag onto the bench. "She has up days and down days."

"Yeah." Cath nodded, not really sure what else to say.

Sara had a tan. She wanted to comment on it but somehow it didn't seem like quite the right time. Instead she tried to swing the conversation onto more safe topics.

"You haven't missed much here. A few burglaries, couple of murders. Nothing out of the ordinary." She chuckled nervously. "We've missed you." She added softly.

"I missed you too." Sara replied with a warm smile, sliding off her jacket. Catherine chewed her lip, debating whether or not to broach the subject of their provisional dinner plans. She opened her mouth to speak but all that came out was a soft sigh. Now wasn't the time. She placed a caring hand on Sara's arm.

"I'm glad your mom's okay." She said at last, ambling slowly to the door.

"Hey Cat." Sara called her back before she could leave. "Are we still on for dinner? Maybe tonight?"

A wide smile broke out across Catherine's face. "That's sounds great."

X x x

"Can I help you, Miss?" Catherine jumped out of her skin, turning to the startled shop assistant with wide eyes.

"Uh, I need a dress." She answered, blushing at her blunt answer.

"Okay, is this for any particular occasion?" The young girl asked politely.

"It's for a date." Just saying the words gave her butterflies. The pretty blonde smiled, directing her to a rack of clothes that Catherine hadn't even noticed behind her.

"This is a new range; do you know how formal this date is?"

"I have no idea." Cath admitted, already scanning through the rack of multi-coloured dresses. The assistant dived in and selected a handful, pulling them to the front.

"Well, these are all more informal, but with the right accessories they could be dressed up as well." She offered. Catherine's eyes lit up when her gaze fell on the front one: it was a sleeveless knee-length jersey dress with a waterfall hem. It was green and brown with pink, purple and yellow patterns, giving it a funky modern, and yet distinctively vintage style.

The attendant obviously noticed her look of glee because she laughed and pointed her in the direction of the changing rooms.

Having fallen in love with it the moment she tried it on, Catherine happily skipped over to the till with it slung over her arm.

"Cath?" Her heart sank a little bit. She knew that voice.

"Karen." She planted a false grin on her face as she turned to face her friend. "How's the little one?" She asked, leaning over the buggy.

"Grouchy." The woman responded.

"Awe, she's probably just worn out from her first shopping trip." Cat smiled, handing her card over to the cashier; coincidently the same woman who had helped her to find the gem of a dress.

"First! She knows this shop better than I do." Karen joked. "She'll be a shopping queen just like her mommy in no time."

"Oh goody." Cath muttered sarcastically, exchanging an amused smile with the shop assistant as she received her purchases and slipped her card back into her purse. "Thank you for your help."

"You're welcome; good luck with the date." The young woman chirped cheerfully.

Karen's ears pricked up.

"Date?" She asked with a sly grin. "Cathy, have you been holding out on us?"

"No." The CSI drew out slowly, moving away from the till. "I haven't seen you to tell you."

"Uh hum, there is this little thing called a phone." The blonde said pointedly. "So, spill. Name, age, good looking?" Catherine pursed her lips.

"They're younger, very hot and have a very pretty name." She answered at last. Karen wolf-whistled. Loudly.

"That's what I want to hear." She grinned. "Listen darling, I've got to run but I want details." She pretended to peck her on the cheek before disappearing into the maze of shoes. Catherine laughed, watching her go.

"I wouldn't hold your breath." She muttered to herself sarcastically.

X x x

When she opened the door, Sara's jaw dropped.

"What, too much?" Cath asked nervously.

"Uh huh." Sara shook her head, looking her up and down. "You look gorgeous."

"Thank you." Catherine blushed furiously. Sara herself was wearing dark, flared trousers and a pretty white shirt that hugged her slim frame in all the right places. The outfit was topped off with a sapphire pendant around her neck, all of which was complimented perfectly by her light tan. Catherine snatched her keys from the table beside the door and locked up, following Sara to the car.

The jaguar, no less.

"That's not yours." Cath stated the obvious, her eyes glistening as she eyed the machine appreciatively.

"I borrowed it from a friend for the night." Sara explained, holding the passenger door open for the blonde chivalrously. "A little bird told me you like flash cars."

"I do." Cath grinned, examining the expensive interior. She cast a furtive glance at Sara. "Which little bird?"

"I was sworn to secrecy." The young brunette laughed. Cath rolled her eyes.

"Warrick."

X x x

"So, where are we going?" She asked after a period of silence.

"Ah, all in good time Senora." Sara smiled mischievously. Catherine pouted playfully.

"I don't like surprises."

"You'll like this one." Sara promised.

X x x

"The Palms?" Cath asked dubiously as Sara handed her keys to the valet.

"Sort of." Sara smiled, taking her hand. She led her straight through to the elevators, whispering something in a member of security's ear.

"I'll let them know you're here." He scuttled off instantly, to Catherine's utmost surprise and infuriation. In the elevator, she sent Sara a suspicious look.

"What's going on? Who's he telling?" Sara laughed, thoroughly enjoying herself at her friend's expense.

"You really don't like not knowing do you?"

"No." Cath pouted sullenly.

"Well, just as well we're here then." She smiled. The doors pinged open and Catherine found herself on the roof terrace, staring at a table for two in front of a view to die for.

"Oh my god." She whispered, turning to Sara who was wearing an elfin grin.

"You like?" She asked nervously.

"Like? Sara…how did you pull this off?"

"I have my ways." The brunette replied enigmatically, pulling out a chair for her. Before Catherine was even fully seated a waiter appeared from nowhere with a bottle of wine. The city lights sparkled off the wine glass, reflecting in the crystal liquid like tiny snowflakes.

"You are too good to be true." Catherine chuckled affectionately.

X x x

There are those that say 'everything glitters in Vegas'. Working in the crime department, Catherine found that phrase difficult to swallow sometimes; but tonight, sitting beneath the stars high above the city lights with a beautiful woman, she couldn't think of a more appropriate phrase.

"Okay, seriously. How did you arrange all of this?" She asked between mouthfuls of dessert.

"You really want to know?" Sara asked.

"Yes." Cath insisted before pausing. "Do I?" Sara laughed.

"It's nothing dodgy I promise. I know one of the waiters here and, since I know how much you love this place, I convinced them to pull some strings and book me in at short notice."

"Sara, The Palms doesn't do short notice. I've tried." Cath contradicted. Sara's lips twitched into an impish smile.

"It does when the head chef's car breaks down and a part-time mechanic fixes it for free." Cath laughed heartily.

"You sneaky little fox."

"What can I say?" Sara shrugged, enjoying seeing Catherine so happy. "I did it for you."

"You didn't have to go to this much trouble." Cath assured her, softening her voice. "I'm not_ that_ high maintenance."

"I know. But I wanted to."

"Why?" She pressed gently. Sara sent her a disbelievingly look.

"Come on Cat, look at you. Who in their right minds wouldn't want to spoil you?" Catherine felt her cheeks flame furiously. Thankfully, she didn't have to formulate a response as the waiter returned.

"Anything else?" He asked politely. Sara raised a questioning eyebrow at Cath.

"No, thank you." She shook her head, her voice strangely unfamiliar in her own ears.

As he scuttled off to fetch the bill, she turned her attention back to Sara who was smiling at her sweetly.

"What?" She asked uncertainly.

"Nothing." Sara shrugged. "I've just never seen you look nervous before. It's cute." Cath laughed timidly.

"If you don't stop that you're going to make me blush again." She commented.

"Good. That's cute too."

X x x

"Hey, are you okay?" Sara glanced over briefly. Since leaving the restaurant, Catherine had been strangely quiet.

"I'm fine." She promised with a small smile. "Just thinking."

It wasn't a lie, she was thinking. More specifically, she was planning what would happen when Sara dropped her off. After all, the date was the easy bit. It was what came after that that scared Catherine.  
>She wanted desperately to let Sara know that she trusted her and wanted to carry this on – whatever it might be – but at the same time she still wasn't convinced that she was ready to take it further physically. But saying no had scared one person off already; she didn't want to risk it happening again.<p>

Thankfully, Sara had already made that decision for them.

Pulling up outside her house, Sara walked Catherine to the front door, waiting for her to unlock it, before dropping a soft kiss on her cheek and bidding her goodnight.

Sailing inside, Catherine practically melted against the closed door.

"You had a good night, I take it?" Nancy's voice filtered through from the lounge.

"I think I'm in love." Cath sang dreamily.

**x x x x **


	14. The Ugly Truth

**Happy? Sad? I don't really know what this chapter is, but I thought I'd share it with you anyway :) Because I'm nice like that**

**Hope you enjoy**

**x x x x**

_**The Ugly Truth**_

Catherine jumped when she felt a soft hand drag across her shoulder blades. She looked up to be met with the smiling face of Sara Sidle.

"Oh, hey." She grinned shyly.

"I called out, but you were in your own little world." Sara explained, sliding into a chair beside her.

"Sorry, just … thinking." She smiled at the younger woman. Staring at her serene face she would bet her life savings that she could lose herself in those chocolate brown eyes forever.

"Well, I was thinking that we could go get something to eat? If you want to, of course." Sara offered. Cath hurriedly looked at her watch – it was mid-shift.

"Sure, I'd like that." She agreed. "I'll just go get my bag.

X x x

"Going somewhere ladies?" Nick's voice filtered down the hall just as they passed the reception desk.

"We're just going to get something to eat." Sara answered evenly.

"Without us?" Warrick actually managed to sound hurt. "Is there something going on that we should know about?" He raised an eyebrow slyly.

"This wouldn't happen to be a date would it?" Nick said with a playful smirk. Catherine jumped at the accusation, her eyes wide. Sara, however, just threw them a lazy smile.

"Yes, and you're not invited."

They sauntered outside to the fading laughter of the boys. As soon as they were out of earshot, Catherine turned to Sara.

"How do you do it?" She asked, slightly in awe.

"What?" Sara blinked at her.

"That! Just brush it off without batting an eyelid." The brunette laughed, offering little more than a shrug.

"Practice." She said. "I've been dealing with this for a lot longer than you have."

"Hmm." Cath nodded thoughtfully as she climbed into the car. They barely left the parking lot before she swirled in her seat to face Sara again. "How long have you been …?"

"Longer than I care to remember." Sara answered bluntly. She cast a brief glance at Catherine, who was wearing a perplexed expression, staring into her lap. Releasing a soft sigh, she reached over and gently interlocked their hands, keeping her gaze on the road. "Cat, I can't promise you that it's going to be easy. There are always going to be people who don't accept it, you just have to stick with the ones who do."

"I know." Catherine shrugged sadly. "I was just thinking … I don't really know that much about you." Sara smirked proudly – it was no surprise that she enjoyed being a mystery. When Cath sent her a pitiful look she laughed. "Tell you what, when we get to the diner you can ask me anything you want."

"Anything?" The blonde chirped with a sweet smile.

"Anything."

X x x

"Seriously?" Cath raised an eyebrow, trying to hide her amusement.

"Seriously." Sara said miserably. "My parents were hippies." She offered by way of explanation of the middle name that currently had Catherine in giggles.

"Awe. It suits you."

"It does not!" She looking up, horrified; something which only extenuated Catherine's delight.

Once she managed to calm down Cat fell quiet, her thoughts drifting back to the question that she had been holding off on asking all night. Sara obviously noticed her inner turmoil because she reached across the table and rested her hand on Catherine's without saying a word.

"Honey …" Cath started to ask before chickening out.

"What?" Sara pressed softly, rubbing small circles on the back of Cath's hand with the pad of her thumb. The blonde sighed, finally managing to meet her questioning gaze.

"What happened with your mom?" Sara retracted her hand, letting them both fall into her lap along with her gaze.

"I was wondering when you'd ask that." She mumbled.

"You don't have to tell me, I was just wondering." Cath assured her gently.

"No, it's okay." Sara promised, lifting her head. "You should probably know what you're getting involved with before we go any further." The way she said it filled Catherine with a feeling of anguish that almost made her regret bringing it up. "My mother's schizophrenic. She stopped taking her medication and … bad things happen when she does that."

"Oh honey." Cath sighed, reaching out to stroke her cheek lightly. Sara shrugged her off, leaning out of her reach. Catherine watched in dismay as her well-honed defences appeared to rocket back into place.

X x x

A soft rapping at the door interrupted Cath's concentration.

"Yeah?" She called, not tearing her eyes from her paperwork.

"Hey." A soft voice called. Her head snapped up instantly, a smile creeping onto her face.

"Hi." She greeted warmly. Sara shut the door and walked in, placing a steaming mug on the desk.

"It's the good stuff, I promise." She said with a soft laugh, sitting down opposite the desk. Cath accepted the drink gratefully, taking a long sip. As her eyes peeped over the top of the mug, she couldn't help but notice that Sara looked at lot more relaxed now. Placing the coffee back down, Catherine leant forward across the desk, tapping her pen nervously against her notes.

"Sara honey, I'm sorry if I upset you earlier."

"It's okay." Sara assured her, taking a deep breath. "To be honest I wanted to explain it to you anyway; I'm just not good at these things." Catherine offered a gentle smile, saying nothing. She sensed that there was more to come.  
>After a whole minute of silence, Sara continued.<p>

"You know I said bad things happen when my mom doesn't take her meds?"

"Yeah."

"Well, until my dad died she didn't even know she had schizophrenia. Nobody did." A frown marred her features. "She had to stab my father to death before anybody took any notice." If she heard Catherine's sudden intake of breath, she didn't let on as she continued with her sad tirade. "When I was a kid I used to wish for my parents to disappear. Then one day they did."

"Honey, I'm so sorry." Catherine whispered, wishing there was something more she could say. Sara suddenly seemed to remember where she was and hurriedly wiped at her eyes.

"Sorry." She murmured, ashamed at her unexpected break down. "I'm not normally like this, I promise." Cautiously, Cath stood up and moved around the desk, tentatively sitting on Sara's lap. She wrapped her arms loosely around the brunette's shoulders.

This time, Sara didn't pull away from her comfort. Her arms snaked around Catherine's waist and she nestled her face in the crook of her neck. Cath could feel her hot breath against the sensitive skin of her collarbone. With a sad smile she dropped a kiss into her soft, dark hair.

"Do you want to go out somewhere later, for a walk?" She asked quietly after a moment's silence.

"I'm sorry; I promised I'd help a friend at her garage." Sara said, shifting position slightly to enable her to look at Cath properly. "But are you free on Saturday?"

"Tomorrow? Yeah, why?" Cath asked.

"There's a carnival in town, I thought maybe we could take Lindsey." Catherine's face lit up, a bright smile replacing the look of sadness that had clouded her eyes.

"She'd love that." She agreed happily. "I'd love that."

X x x

"Oh my god, have you seen Stephanie's new boyfriend?" Debs asked excitedly. "Talk about downsizing. He looks like someone you'd expect to find working at the cinema."

"A teenager?" Karen frowned, bouncing the gurgling baby on her lap.

"Or a 40-year-old loser who still lives with his parents." Laura laughed hysterically at her own joke. Catherine rolled her eyes, opting to keep silent.

"Oh, talking of boyfriends…how did the date go?" Karen turned to her with an inquisitive grin. This was news to the other two who leant forwards, intrigued by this revelation.

"Date?" Laura queried.

"Catherine had a hot date the other night; I caught her buying a new dress."

"Ooh, it must have been a big deal." Debs said giddily.

"It was from White House Black Market." Karen added with a wink.

"Oh, I love that place! I found the cutest sweater in there!" Laura squealed. Catherine sat back with a gleeful smile as they chattered animatedly until she could get a word in.

"Are you quite finished?" She asked when they all turned to her expectantly, awaiting answers. Karen poked her playfully, waiting for more. "It went well." She said at last. "Very well, in fact."

They all wolf whistled and cheered, exchanging winks and nudges with each other like school girls.

"It wasn't like that." She clarified pointedly. "They were ... sweet."

"Well, come on. Details!"

"No details." She shook her head to a chorus of disappointment.

"But you are seeing him again, right?"

"Yeah." She smiled. "As a matter of fact we're taking Lindsey to the carnival this weekend."

"Oh, speaking of the carnival," Karen jumped in, turning the attention back to herself. "David took the kids the other night; they came back high as kites on sugar and he had a fake tattoo!" The women all laughed and giggled, Catherine's love life temporarily forgotten.

"I can't believe where they put it this year. It's almost within view of our house." Laura said, perturbed.

"Hey, speaking of ill-placed things, is there any more news on this mosque they're supposedly building?" Deborah asked, her expression turning serious now. "I asked Jessica and Robert about it the other night and they weren't even aware of it."

Catherine's lips twitched. She couldn't believe they were still falling for that.  
>Actually, she could, which was quite saddening.<p>

"James tried to get in touch with the council and they're being really cagey – they refused to say anything on it."

"They can't do that! It's a community issue, they have to say something."

"Well so far they're not budging."

"That's because there's nothing to say." Cath laughed dryly, interrupting their rant. They all sent her a bemused look. "I made it up!"

"You did what?" Laura asked, her voice dropping dangerously low.

"Why would you do that?" Deborah was confused.

"Because you guys are too discriminatory for your own good." She pointed out, feeling herself get angry as the memory of their comments surfaced in her mind. "I wanted to see how much you would overreact."

"I can't believe you did that." Karen snarled, growing livid. "What on earth has gotten into you lately?"

"What's gotten into me?" Cath snapped. "You're the ones trying to get a teacher sacked because she's gay!"That earned them a few subtle glances from other patrons of the coffee shop as Catherine pushed herself away from the table and stood up. "You're the ones with the issues."

"You know, sometimes I don't even know who you are." Laura said coldly. Catherine choked out a dry laugh, turning to leave.

"Yeah, join the club." She muttered to herself as she walked away, leaving the stunned group of women to stare in her wake.

Something told her they wouldn't be too interested in the details of her next date.


	15. The Experiment

**Bit of a random chapter I must admit, but a necessary one I feel. **

**Some of you may recognise the end bit as a scene from season 11, episode 9 (Wild Life). Adapted for my own needs, of course :)  
><strong>

**x x x x**

_**The Experiment **_

"So, how's the wild life treating you?" Nancy asked sarcastically. Catherine pursed her lips.

"I might have made a mistake." She confessed.

"Why, what's happened now?" The nurse asked despairingly, already slipping into overprotective mode. Catherine realised how that must have sounded and hurriedly corrected herself.

"Oh, everything's fine with Sara." She promised. "In fact we're taking Lindsey to the carnival later today."

"Alright." Nancy nodded. "So what's wrong?"

"I might have misled the girls about something."

"What?" Nancy asked tentatively, not sure she wanted to ask.

"I told them that the council were planning on building a mosque down the road from the elementary school." Nancy's eyes widened.

"I heard that rumour floating around. That was you?" Cath nodded slowly, biting her lip. "I'm not sure I want to hear this, but why did you do that?"

"Because they had it coming!" Cath threw her hands up. "If anyone doesn't fit into their perfect little middle-class ivory world then it's like they're not important enough to matter."

"Cathy, does this little vendetta have anything to do with your new … change in taste?"

Catherine scowled at her. "Maybe." She conceded. "But they still had it coming."

"That may well be true, but don't you think you should sort your head out before you go on an equal rights campaign?"

"What do you mean?" Catherine asked tetchily.

"I just mean that you still don't seem convinced of what you want."

"Yes I am." The elder sister retorted. "I want Sara."

"Hmm." Nancy nodded sceptically. "I'm still not sure of all this."

"Not sure of what?" Lily asked, announcing her presence as she swaggered into the room.

"Jesus mother." Cath jumped, startled by her sudden appearance. The woman merely raised an eyebrow and repeated her question.

"Uh, I want to redecorate." She blurted the first thing that came into her head.

"Oh, good." Lily stated. "I actually have a few ideas for this place." She began spouting her opinion on modern décor, helping herself to a cup of tea in the process. As she chattered, Nancy sent her sister a look, mouthing to her behind their mom's back. Cath silently told her to hush up. In response, Nancy stood up and moved around the table to whisper against her ear.

"If you're so certain, why the big secret?" Catherine elbowed her roughly just as Lily turned around, a sceptical look in her eyes.

"Alright, what don't I know?" She asked calmly, sitting down. Nancy opened her mouth, but Catherine booted her in the shin before she could speak.

"Ow!" The nurse squealed, falling inelegantly into a chair.

"Nothing. You were talking about carpet samples?" Catherine smiled sweetly, taking a long sip of her coffee.

X x x

You could see the lights sparkling from miles away.

Lindsey's bright blue eyes glittered with glee as they walked through the mass of stalls and rides. Sara laughed, shaking her head.

"Look at her; she doesn't know where to start." She grinned, watching the little girl's gaze dart around the scene in awe.

"I think you've made a friend for life." Cath joked.

"Well, they say the way to a parent's heart is through the kids." Sara laughed.

"Oh, is that why you're doing this?" Cath pulled a mock-offended face.

"Well, there might be another reason too." The brunette smiled, slipping her hand into Catherine's. The blonde chewed her lip, swallowing the urge to kiss her.

"Mommy, Sara!" A little voice chirped up excitedly. "Can we go on the waltzes? Please?"

X x x

Tired, giddy and a little queasy, Catherine and Sara spilled out of the car. Catherine, armed with a giant teddy and a month's supply of sweets, went to unlock the front door while Sara lifted a sleeping Lindsey out of the car seat and carried her carefully up the drive.

"I warned you she's heavy." Cath joked light-heartedly. Sara just laughed softly; she climbed the stairs carefully with the dozing child in her arms, followed by Catherine.

While Cath put her daughter to bed, Sara headed downstairs and made two cups of coffee.

Catherine breezed into the lounge, dropping onto the couch beside her girlfriend and accepting the offered mug gratefully.

"She still asleep?" Sara asked, nursing her drink carefully.

"Spark out." Cath nodded, settling back into the cushions. "Sorry it's nothing stronger; I don't know where my wine's gone." She frowned. "I suspect Nancy may have found my hiding place."

"It's fine." Sara laughed. They fell into an easy silence, just enjoying the peace and quiet of each other's company. Cath leant over, resting her head on Sara's shoulder tiredly.

When the silence began to get overwhelming, they both piped up at the same time. Catherine laughed nervously, gesturing for Sara to go on, but the brunette shook her head.

"Well, I just wanted to say thank you for the other night." She began timidly. "And I wanted to ask where we stand on …" she took a deep breath, trying to organise her thoughts better. Fortunately, Sara seemed to understand what she was talking about. She leant forward, putting her mug on the coffee table and gave Catherine her full attention.

"Cath, babe, we won't do anything until you're 100% ready." She promised gently, stroking the back of her hand.

"Really?" Catherine asked tentatively.

"Of course!" Sara seemed surprised she had even asked. "We don't do anything you're not ready for. There's no need to rush." Catherine smiled, shuffling closer and pressing her lips to Sara's in a tender kiss.

X x x

"Evening boys." Catherine grinned, sailing into the locker room.

"Hey Cath." Warrick greeted, exchanging a look with Nick. "You seem happy."

"I am happy." She agreed with a cheerful smile.

"Yeah, what's got you so chirpy?" The Texan asked. "Or should that be who?" He amended cheekily. She sent him a lazy grin.

"Ah Nicky, no man has ever made me this happy." She winked at them before practically floating into the hall.

"Man, what's she on?" Nick asked.

"Whatever it is I want some." Warrick shook his head with amusement.

X x x

"How's my ass?" Nick asked, turning his back to the others.

"Nicky, your ass is a work of art but there's no paint on the back of your thighs." Catherine pointed out.

"That means the victim's thighs must have had more contact with the railing, but the only way to replicate those injuries is if she was sitting on the railing when she went over." Warrick theorised. "But according to Dana, she and the victim were fighting and she pushed her in self defence."

"Well, sitting on a balcony is not a position of power in a fight." Catherine pointed out thoughtfully. "So, maybe the victim wasn't the aggressor."

"So, what now?" Nick asked. A sly smile spread across Catherine's lips.

"Fresh coat of paint." She stated, pointing at the railing. "I have an idea."

X x x

"You rang?" Sara asked, materialising in the threshold. Catherine smirked at her.

"I did. Put this on and sit down." She threw her a boiler suit and patted the railing. Sara raised an eyebrow suspiciously but did as she was asked and hopped onto the railing with a supporting hand from Nick.

"Alright, so the victim fell from the seventh floor. Dana claims that Stacey was attacking her on the balcony and that she pushed her in self defence."Warrick filled in the blanks for the brunette.

"Okay." She nodded. "Why am I on the railing?" Catherine smirked at her.

"Because you're my victim."

"Alright, we have established that she was sitting on the balcony when she fell backwards." Nick added. "So, what now?"

"We found footprints on the bottom of the railing; we assumed it was from Dana leaning over after Stacey fell. But, what if they got there before?" She stepped closer to the railing, placing her hands on Sara's shoulders. Nick came up behind her, supporting her from behind.

"Alright, I see where we're going with this." Warrick chuckled, placing a supporting hand on Sara's back as Catherine settled herself in Sara's lap.

"Ecklie's not in the building right?" The blonde murmured, causing a laugh to bubble out of the brunette.

"Seven stories up?" Nick asked. "Isn't this a little Cirque du Soleil?"

"Oh, danger just adds to the excitement Nicky." Cath grinned. She could feel the heat from Sara's hands burning into her skin through the boiler suit.

"This is my first three-way." Nick said excitedly as he held the blonde in place. Cath sent him a look over her shoulder.

"Who says I'm sharing?"

"Alright, so things are heating up." Warrick jumped in with an amused laugh. "It wouldn't take much for you to fall." He moved his hand from Sara's back, causing her to slip. However, to their surprise it was Catherine who toppled over, sliding sideways onto the crash mat while Sara fell forwards into Nicky's waiting arms.

"Oops." Cath said, picking herself up with a helping hand from Warrick.

"Hey Cath," The dark-skinned man cleared his throat, attempting to indicate the back of her legs without it coming out wrong. She spun around, trying to see.

"You managed to get more paint on you than Sara did." Nick pointed out. "That must mean Dana was the one sat on the railing." The women exchanged a smile.

"Thank you." She nodded at the brunette. "I think you just helped us solve this case."

As the boys started to tidy up the mess they had made, Cath sidled closer to Sara, leaning close enough to whisper in her ear.

"See, I told you you'd enjoy it."

**x x x x**

**:)**


	16. All's Fair in Love and War

_**All's Fair in Love and War**_

"Something on your mind?" Nancy asked, watching her sister stir her drink lazily with the wrong end of a spoon.

"No." Catherine said glumly. "I'm just thinking."

"About?" Nance pressed. Catherine chewed her lip nervously.

"I want to sleep with Sara." Nancy nearly choked on her coffee, spluttering it across the table. "Gee, thanks." Cath said dryly, wiping her arm.

"You what?" Nancy coughed. Cath blinked at her.

"I want to sleep with her. I'm ready."

"And you're telling me this because?" The younger woman asked, having recovered from her choking fit.

"Because you asked." Cath shrugged. Nancy moved their mugs aside so she could reach across the table and grip her sister's hands.

"Cathy, are you sure about this? I mean, you've only been seeing her for a few weeks."

"I know." Cath said. "But I think I'm ready."

"You think?" Nancy picked up on her slip of the tongue.

"No. I know." Catherine amended, although it sounded weak even to her own ears. "I just don't know how to tell her…"

"Surely that should be the easy bit." Nance scoffed. Catherine frowned, chosing not to answer.

X x x

She felt Catherine's tongue exploring her mouth; she could taste the alcohol on her breath.

She wasn't sure how much wine Catherine had had before she arrived; but judging by the way she had pounced on her as soon as she got through the door, Sara assumed it was too much.

The brunette placed her hands on Cath's shoulders, attempting to push her off. However, as Sara was pinned on the couch, Catherine used the position to her advantage and slipped her hands beneath her shirt. Sara writhed beneath her, attempting to still her roaming hands.

"Cath," Sara breathed, finally breaking the forceful kiss. "What are you doing?"

"What does it feel like I'm doing?" Cath responded, moving her lips to Sara's neck. The young woman finally managed to slide out from underneath her, despite the blonde's protests.

"Honey, you need to stop." She said gently, holding Cath's wrists loosely in her hands. When Catherine continued her attempts to pull Sara back down, she repeated herself slowly and clearly: "You need to stop." Catherine fell back onto the couch with a pitiful look. Certain she had given up struggling; Sara released her and stepped away from the couch. Cath pouted at her in confusion.

"Sara?" she whimpered as her girlfriend disappeared into the kitchen.

X x x

Catherine just watched her for a moment: her fluid movements, her ease as she sailed around the lab. After a good few minutes of staring, a soft voice appeared in her ear.

"What are you doing?" She jumped, coming face to face with a smirking Nicky.

"Nothing." She said defensively. "What are you doing?" Their voices had attracted Sara's attention, who glanced up from her work.

"Hey," She greeted them both with a frown, checking her watch. "Am I late?"

"No, Grissom's not even in yet." Nick said, sidling around the blonde to get a better look at what she was working on. "Is this for the Richardson case?"

"Yeah, I'm trying to get a physical match between the head injury and one of these." She gestured to the array of potential weapons splayed out in front of her. "So far, no dice."

"How long have you been here?"

"A couple of hours." She shrugged avoiding their gazes. Nick patted her on the shoulder, heading back towards the door.

"You're a glutton for punishment, Sidle." He hollered over his shoulder before drifting back into the hallway.

Catherine waited until he was well out of sight before pushing herself off the doorframe and shuffling into the lab. Sara continued with her work, studiously avoiding meeting her eyes.

"Honey, I'm sorry about last night." The supervisor said softly. "I don't remember that much of it." She confessed.

"What do you remember?" Sara asked, casting a quick glance up. Cath bit her lip.

"Drinking." She nodded. "And making out on the couch." She paused, sending Sara a shy look. "We didn't … did we?"

"No." Sara shook her head resolutely, finally meeting her eyes probably. "No, I uh, I gave you some water and put you to bed."

"Thank you." Cath sighed, relief washing over her features. "I … it's not that I don't want to; I do." She added as an afterthought.

"Cat, it's okay. There's no rush." Sara promised her quietly.

"I really do want to," Catherine insisted, moving around the bench to stand in front of her. "I just … I don't want it to be like that."

"Then why did you do it?"

"I was scared." She admitted ashamedly. "I don't know what to do. I just thought that if I had a drink it might relax me."

"Cat, I keep telling you that we don't have to do anything until you're ready." Sara explained exasperatedly.

"I am ready!"

"Clearly you're not if you need to get hammered first." Sara pointed out. "Cat, you might be okay with doing that but I'm not."

"What do you mean?" Cath asked, thrown.

"I mean I won't take advantage of you; what kind of girlfriend would I be if I'd let you do that?"

"Sara, it wasn't like that. I didn't mean to put you in that position, I was just nervous. But, I really do want this with you." Cath's heartfelt plea was interrupted by her phone. She cast a quick glance at it and sighed. "Grissom."

"You should take it." Sara mumbled, turning her back. Catherine stared at her for a minute before releasing a deep breath and wandering into the corridor to take her call.

"Can we talk about this later?" She asked hurriedly. Sara's only response was a silent shrug. Catherine shook her head sadly, walking away from her girlfriend.

X x x

If Sara was startled to find her front door unlocked, she was staggered to discover every flat surface in her apartment covered in twinkling candles. With a confused smile she edged her bedroom door open, peering inside.

No one was there. Walking further in, she observed the abundance of rose petals scattered across her bed.

"Oh my goodness." She gasped, her eyes sparkling with amazement, until a pair of gentle hands slipped over them. Familiar hot breath tickled the back of her neck.

"Guess who?" A husky voice whispered against her ear.

"How did you get in my house?" Sara laughed quietly, turning in her arms. The moment she laid eyes on Catherine, her jaw dropped. The blonde was wearing a satin black slip beneath a shimmery silk robe. "Wow." She whispered. Cath smiled bashfully, stepping closer to peck her lips.

"That's the reaction I was hoping for." She grinned.

"What's going on?" Sara asked softly, her hands tracing Catherine's sides gently. The older woman shrugged, toying with the buttons on Sara's shirt as she slowly slid them undone one at a time.

"I wanted to make up for yesterday." She explained. "And I wanted it to be special." She flicked her eyes up nervously to meet Sara's gaze.

"Cath..."

"No." Catherine cut her off with a chaste kiss. "I want this Sara. ." She took a deep breath. "I don't know what I'm doing and I can't for the life of me understand how I ended up here. But I know that I want this."She licked her lips nervously. "And know that I want it to be with you."

"You sure?" Sara asked, brushing Cath's hair aside tenderly. Catherine held her gaze, stepping closer.

"Sara, last night ... anyone else would have taken advantage of me. You took care of me. And I know that if I want to stop you'll let me. I have never trusted anyone as much as I trust you." Her fingertips trailed gently down Sara's chest. "If this is what you want too?"

"Of course!" Sara agreed instantly, a gentle frown on her face at the thought that she even had to ask.

"Good." Catherine kissed her lips, undoing the final button on Sara's shirt and letting it fall open. "Because there's no one else I would rather be with right now."

The brunette smiled, kicking the bedroom door closed behind them.

X x x

Catherine awoke to the sweet sight of Sara's sleeping face. She smiled, leaning forward to place a kiss on the tip of her nose. Sara scrunched it up, eliciting a giggle from Catherine, who repeated her actions. This time Sara curled up tighter, pulling Catherine closer as she did. The blonde snuggled against her, revelling in the feel of the young woman against her semi-clad body.

Memories of the morning stirred inside Catherine; Sara's hands barely grazing her skin. She had moved painfully slow down her body; taking her time, letting Cath become familiar with her touch. Her lips had found Catherine's ear, whispering soft words to her. She remembered sinking her nails into Sara's back, holding her in place. The butterflies in her stomach had been replaced by a new feeling, unfamiliar to the blonde - but it was a feeling she never wanted to end.

"Talk to me." Sara had mumbled against her skin, letting her lips dance across Catherine's shoulder blade. Cath tried to speak, to tell her what she wanted, but only one thought managed to escape her mouth.

"I love you."

After that her memories descended into a swirl of hushed cries and ecstasy.

A tingle went down her spine; she could still recall the path Sara's hands had taken down her body. Her blue eyes scanned the girl's serene face, her fingers gently drawing patterns on her back. She began peppering kisses along Sara's neckline until the brunette stirred.

"Hi." Catherine hummed.

"Hey. What time is it?" Sara asked sleepily.

"I don't care." Cath stated softly, nuzzling her face. As they lay in silence Catherine let her hands begin to wander underneath Sara's shirt.

"Stop it." Sara mumbled with a frown.

"What?" Cath asked, confused.

"It tickles." A feral grin spread across Catherine's face and she moved her hands further up, dancing her fingertips across Sara's ribcage. The brunette attempted to fight her off between giggles. Catherine laughed merrily, rolling on top of her. Sara eventually managed to seize her hands, sending her a scowl. "Not fair." She grumbled. With a sweet smile Cath leant down and pecked her lips.

"All's fair in love and war, dear."

X x x

She was staring. She knew that she was doing it and yet she couldn't help it.

"Thank you." She whispered, causing Sara to blink at her in confusion. "For this morning." She added. Sara smiled as the penny dropped.

"You're welcome." She mumbled, placing a plate of food in front of her girlfriend and taking a seat beside her at the breakfast bar.

"You know, I want to … I just…"

"It's okay." Sara cut her off softly. "Baby steps, remember."

"Yeah." Catherine agreed timidly. "One day I'll repay the favour." She added with an impish smile.

"I'll hold you to that." Sara joked playfully, her hand darting out to tickle Catherine's ribs. The blonde squealed, curling away from her touch.

"Meanie." She scowled. Sara sent her a lazy smile.

"All's fair in love and war, right?."

**x x x x**

**:) Hope you enjoyed**


	17. HappyGoLucky

**AN: I made a few changes to the last chapter this morning, so anyone who read it last night when it was first posted, you might want to read it again. **

**Hope you're all enjoying, drop me a review and let me know what you think so far**

**x x x x**

_**Happy-Go-Lucky**_

Leaning casually against the countertop and staring out of the window, dressed only in one of Sara's t-shirts and a pair of fluffy slippers, Catherine let her thoughts wander.

She was, she realised, fast becoming addicted to Sara's touch; even the softest of kisses or a brief touch on her hand made her weak. The brunette was still being patient with her, always careful not to be too tactile, to the point that Catherine was starting to crave more physical affection from her.

She was starting to become more confident in bed too, although she still hadn't … reciprocated as it were.

The kettle beeped, startling her out of her thoughts. She poured two cups of coffee and shuffled back upstairs.

She nudged the bedroom door open and slipped inside. Placing the two mugs on the table, she climbed back into bed and snuggled down, letting one hand run through the sleeping woman's silky hair as she sipped her drink contentedly.

X x x

"Have you told anyone at work yet?" Nancy asked, nibbling happily at her Popsicle. Cath sent her a sideways glance.

"What do you think?" She scoffed, taking her time with her own treat. The kids had already eaten theirs and had scuttled back onto the play area, where Jeremy was currently swinging from the monkey bars while Lindsey grinned up at him from below.

"I take it you haven't told your friends either." Nancy guessed. Cath shook her head, avoiding her gaze.

"No. No, I think they're still mad at me."

"Can you blame them?" Nance asked dryly. Cath shrugged, choosing not to answer. Truth be told, they had been the last thing on her mind in recent days.

"I just want things to stay as they are for a while." She mumbled at last, casting a loving gaze over her daughter. "Everything's perfect as it is."

X x x

"Oh God!" Catherine hissed as Sara's teeth nipped her neck. She dragged her nails down the girl's back, holding her fiercely tight.

When Sara's fingertips started to roam across her stomach lightly, Cath's hands shot out and grabbed her wrists, stilling her movements. Sara instantly stopped what she was doing, pulling back far enough to see her girlfriend's face.

"You okay Cath?" She asked gently, searching her eyes for some sign of what was wrong. But all she saw was a calm smile. Catherine leant up and kissed her softly, slowly rolling them over until she was lying on top of the brunette.

"Everything's fine." She promised, moving her hands from Sara's wrists to her shoulders. Sara looked up at her in mild confusion. Cath could feel her girlfriend's heart starting to beat faster against her own chest and smiled, kissing her again. This time the kiss was fierce, passionate.

This time, Sara understood her intentions.

X x x

"You're beautiful." Sara whispered, brushing a stray blonde hair aside. Catherine released a soft breath in response but didn't stir. She had lost track of how long she had been watching her sleep, but to be honest she didn't really care. The older woman was pressed close against her, buried deep beneath the covers.

A noise outside the window seemed to disturb her for she scrunched up her face, grumbling quietly. Sara chuckled, causing Cath to crack an eye open.

"Hi." She said hoarsely, her features softening.

"Hey." Sara responded, leaning in to kiss her lips tenderly. Once they broke apart Cath's eyes were open and she was smiling at Sara in puzzlement.

"What was that for?"

"No reason." Sara shrugged, repeating her actions. "Just wanted to." She mumbled against Catherine's mouth.

"Hmm, I could get used to waking up to this." Cath grinned, nestling closer underneath the covers.

"Don't you have to pick up Lindsey?" Sara asked, trailing her hand up and down Catherine's back sensuously.

"That's not for ages." Cath yawned, shuffling until she found a comfortable position to snooze in. Just as she got herself settled snugly, an irritating trilling sparked into life. "Urgh no!" She groaned, causing Sara great amusement.

"I think your alarm clock disagrees." She laughed softly. With a disgruntled moan, Cath pushed herself up and leant across the brunette to smack the offending item. Making the most of her vulnerable position, Sara's hands snuck beneath her shirt and tickled her lightly. The blonde shrieked, jumping away.

"That's mean." She scowled.

"Now you know how I feel when you catch me off guard." Sara joked, curling back up. Cath sat up and ran a hand through her unruly bed-hair, looking down at the girl with an affectionate smile.

"Are you planning on staying there?"

"Mhmm." Sara hummed. Cath's lips spread into a grin. She leant down to whisper in her ear.

"Darling you can stay as long as you like," she placed a kiss beside her ear. "But I warn you it might get cold." With that she whipped the covers off of her, causing the girl to emit a startled yelp. Catherine chuckled as she used the blanket to cover herself up. "I warned you baby." She smiled sweetly at the glowering brunette.

X x x

She could feel their judgemental eyes on her long before she saw them.

Huddled in the corner like the witches of Eastwick, gossiping about her. She knew it was about her because they were taking it in turns to stare at her from beneath their false eyelashes while pretending to engage in conversation.

On an ordinary day she may have said something to them, or simply walked away. But today was not an ordinary day – not for her. Today had thus far been an extremely good day and she was not about to let them ruin that for her.

So, leaning casually against the school railings, she tilted her head back towards the bright sun and she thought of Sara.

And when Lindsey came skipping out of school, she walked past them with her head held high and a smile on her face.

X x x

"What's she doing now?" Laura hissed conspiratorially.

"Nothing." Debs said. "She's just stood there."

"Is she looking over here?"

"No, she's looking at the sky." They all turned around to stare at the strawberry-blonde. She looked curiously relaxed for someone who was clearly being snubbed.

"I wonder what's up with her lately." Karen shook her head in bemusement. "She's been all over the place."

"Maybe one of us should go talk to her?" Deborah suggested, earning her a shocked glare from the other two. "What? I'm just saying she's still our friend."

"Have you forgotten already what she did to us?" Laura asked coldly.

"No, but … maybe she had a point."

"What?" Karen choked. "You can't seriously be defending her."

"Alright, so she didn't go about it in the right way but she was right: we can be a bit judgemental sometimes." Debs continued. "I just think maybe we're being too harsh on her."

"Well if that's how you feel then maybe you should go join her?" Laura challenged. She knew that Deborah wouldn't have the guts to take such a stand, but she took some pleasure in watching the more impressionable of the group squirm all the same.

As the kids started to surge from the building the women fell silent, waiting for their offspring to descend. They spotted Lindsey first, watching her run into Catherine's waiting arms, chattering animatedly about something.

By the time their own children emerged, demanding attention and sugar, the CSI and her daughter had already disappeared from sight.


	18. The Blind Side

_**The Blind Side**_

Catherine slipped her jacket off, feeling her tired, achy muscles object to the movements. She stretched, cringing as she heard them click back into place. With a heavy sigh she dropped onto the bench, just enjoying the peace and quiet for a few minutes.

"Hey." A soft voice interrupted her thoughts. She looked up, a warm smile instantly playing on her lips.

"Hey." She repeated, standing up to embrace Sara. She cast a quick glance into the corridor to check they were alone before pressing a brief kiss to her lips. "How's your mom?"

"She's okay." Sara said, coming fully into the room and sitting down. Catherine joined her on the bench, interlocking their hands loosely.

"Good. That's good." She nodded. "And you? How are you doing?"

"I'm fine." Sara smiled, taking a moment to scan Catherine's features. "You're tired." She stated. Catherine looked up at her in surprise.

"Yeah, I guess I am." She conceded, running a hand through her hair. "I just haven't had a lot of sleep these last few days." Sara quirked a questioning eyebrow at her but Cath just shrugged in response. "I don't know, it's just been a long week. But it's all better now that you're back." She added with a smile, pecking Sara's lips gently. The brunette smiled, opening her mouth to speak; however she stopped short when Grissom materialised in the doorway.

"Sara. You're back." He blinked, surprised by her presence.

"I am." She agreed, mentally cursing his inopportune timing.

"How's…" he stopped, suddenly realising that Catherine was also in the room. Sara understood his pause.

"It's okay. She knows." He nodded, relief flooding his features.

"Oh, good. How is your mom?"

"She's doing better. Still a bit on edge but she's getting there."

"Good." He nodded solemnly. His trained blue eyes settled on their conjoined hands resting in Catherine's lap. He quirked an eyebrow at it but didn't pass comment.

"Well, I'd better go find Nick and chase up our trace results." Sara said at last when being the centre of attention got too much for her. Cath reluctantly let go of her hand, watching her walk away with a sad smile. As soon as she was out of sight, Grissom came further inside and tentatively sat on the edge of the bench.

"Hey Catherine … thank you." He said in a conspiratorial whisper. The blonde frowned in confusion.

"You're welcome. For what?"

"For being there for Sara." He answered as if it were obvious. "I know you've had your ups and downs but she really needs people around her now and you know that I'm not good at this sort of thing." Cath smiled; she couldn't argue with that.

"It's fine." She assured him, trying to hide her amusement. "I promise I'll be there for as long as she wants me."

"Good." Grissom grinned, oblivious to the other meaning to her words.

X x x

"Catherine? Is that you?" Cath froze in the doorway. Her mother was in her house. Her girlfriend was asleep upstairs.

At least, she hoped she was still asleep.

"Mom?" She asked tentatively, creeping into the kitchen. "What are you doing here?"

"What? I can't drop by to see my daughter without booking an appointment?" Lily said in a hurt voice. Catherine rolled her eyes, relief flooding her body. Sara must still be in bed.

"Of course, I just wished you'd called first." Cath shrugged it off, unpacking her shopping bag. Lily peered over her shoulder, investigating her purchases.

"Tofu?" She asked curiously, turning the packet over in her hands. Cath snatched it back.

"I'm on a diet." She lied, hoping it would lead to one of her mother's famous lectures about something other than her love life.

Instead, the only noise that was heard in the kitchen was the floorboards above creaking. Cath's eyes flew to the ceiling.

"Erm, why don't you put the kettle on and I'll be right back." She said, plastering a false smile on her face.

"Cathy?" Lily frowned at her, her maternal instincts picking up on her daughter's erratic mood.

The blonde was already half way upstairs when Sara emerged around the corner, sleepy and stifling a yawn. Cath rugby-tackled the startled woman back into the bedroom, kicking the door shut behind them

"Cat?" Sara asked, suddenly more awake now.

"Shush." She hissed, placing a finger over the brunette's lips. "My mother is downstairs."

"Is she not meant to be?" Sara asked, perplexed. Cath sent her a look.

"She doesn't know about us." The older woman explained, bundling Sara into the en-suite. "Please can you just stay up here until I can get rid of her?"

"Okay." Sara agreed slowly. "How long might that be?"

"I don't know, anywhere between an hour and a month." She rolled her eyes. "Look, feel free to have a shower or read a magazine; I just really don't want her to find out like this."

"Okay, it's alright." Sara assured her panicking girlfriend. "Relax hun, I'm not going to out you to your mom."

"Thank you." Cath breathed.

"You'd better go before she starts to wonder where've run off to and comes looking for you."

"Yeah, you're right." Cath nodded hurriedly, pecking her lips briefly. "You're a star."

X x x

"I ran into Laura Hamley the other day." Lily stated, lifting her gaze briefly from her cup of tea.

"Really?" Cath asked indifferently, sensing where this was going. "How is she?"

"She said that you had caused a falling out." The older woman probed. Cath laughed dryly.

"It was nothing; it was just a stupid joke that got a little out of hand."

"You should apologise."

"What?" Cath barked. "Why should I? They brought it on themselves."

"Because, Cathy, they're the only friends you've got." Lily pointed out. Cath was sure she didn't mean for it to come out in the way it did but it stung all the same.

"I have other friends. What about the people at work?" She pointed out. Lily just raised an eyebrow.

"Catherine, you cannot live for your work forever. What about Lindsey, she needs friends too and they all have children. No one at work does."

"Yeah, well maybe I don't want Lindsey being friends with their kids." Cath snapped.

"Why on earth not?" Lily looked taken aback by her harsh words. Catherine opened her mouth to speak, but whatever she was going to say died on her lips as she was cut off by an unnatural bang from above.

"Sara." She mumbled, launching herself from her chair.

"Catherine?" Lily jumped up too, following her daughter through the house, albeit at a much slower pace.

Catherine took the stairs two at a time, swinging around the corner at the top.

She burst into the bedroom, scanning it quickly. It was empty but she could hear the shower running in the en-suite. She was vaguely aware of her mother's voice behind her but blocked it out.

"Sara?" She called against the bathroom door. No answer. Without a moment's hesitation she threw the door open.

The first thing she saw was red water splashed against the white tiled floor. Blood, flowing from the gash on Sara's forehead. The brunette was collapsed on the shower floor, the water still beating down against her naked back.

"Oh God." Cath breathed, hurriedly turning off the tap and crouching down beside her fallen partner. "Sara, honey? Wake up sweetie." She pressed her fingertips to Sara's neck, breathing a sigh of relief when she felt a strong pulse beating against her skin.

The woman stirred, instinctively trying to roll over.

"No, it's okay honey. You're okay." Cath stilled her movements, grabbing a towel from somewhere and wrapping it around her.

X x x

Lily reached the bedroom barely a minute after her daughter. She could hear her panicked voice coming from the bathroom.

She didn't know what she was expecting to see, but it was not that.

Catherine was crouched over a semi-conscious naked woman in her shower. She looked familiar but beneath the damp ringlets and streaks of blood it was impossible to be sure.

Lily stepped out of the room, taking a deep breath. Her gaze settled on the phone.

There was going to words later, that was for sure, but certain things took precedence.

X x x

"I slipped." Sara mumbled in a confused voice.

"I know. It's okay." Catherine promised, helping her to sit up very slowly. She carefully moved her damp hair aside to examine the cut – it wasn't deep but it was enough to cause concern. "Sweetheart, I think you need to go to hospital."

"No." Sara insisted, shaking her head and instantly regretting the motion.

"Baby its okay. It's just to check you over. I'll be there with you." Catherine tried to reassure her but to no avail.

"No hospital." Sara repeated through clenched teeth.

"Nancy's on her way." Lily spoke up quietly, placing the phone down beside Catherine. She locked eyes with her eldest daughter, her silent way of telling her that this was not over. "I'll wait downstairs for her."

When they were alone, Sara opened her mouth to apologise but Catherine silenced her before she could speak.

"It's okay." She said simply. "Right now, you're my only priority."


	19. The Peacemaker

_**The Peacemaker**_

Catherine heard Nancy before she saw her, thundering upstairs and clattering inelegantly into the bathroom. Sara looked up with a startled expression at the blonde's graceless entrance.

"What happened?" She asked breathlessly, seemingly oblivious to Sara's state of undress as she knelt down and began checking the wound carefully, sweeping damp brunette ringlets aside.

"She slipped." Cath answered brusquely. "You got here very fast."

"I wasn't far away." Nancy answered absently. "I think this needs a hospital trip."

"No." Sara said before she even finished the sentence. Nance raised an eyebrow at her sister, who merely shrugged helplessly.

"I'd save your breath." She suggested wryly.

"Alright, in that case I'm going to need more light and some medical supplies." Nancy compromised.

"Bedroom." Cath answered. Between them they guided Sara carefully into the adjoining room and sat her on the bed, still only wrapped in a towel. Cath dug out a first aid kit and settled herself beside Sara on the bed while the nurse got to work.

"I take it mom knows." She stated candidly, flicking her eyes up briefly before returning to the task at hand.

"Sorry." Sara mumbled sheepishly. Catherine shook her head, squeezing her hand softly.

"Not your fault, babe. Let's just get you patched up." She assured her gently.

"It doesn't look deep but I would still prefer to get a second opinion." Nancy said, gently cleaning the wound with something that Sara did not appear to like.

"I trust your opinion." She said with a pained scowl. Nancy laughed, shaking her head.

"I appreciate the confidence." She chuckled dryly.

"Don't hurt her!" Cath jumped in shrilly when Sara winced at something the nurse did.

"Its fine Cath, I won't hurt her." Nancy promised, trying to swallow a laugh at Sara's face. Clearly she was equally as amused by her girlfriend's maternal instincts. "It really should be stitched up properly, but since you won't go to hospital…" she raised an eyebrow pointedly, "I'll have to make do."

"Great." Sara agreed bluntly. The younger blonde started carefully placing butterfly bandages across the tender wound. "Ow!" Sara jumped when Nancy caught a sensitive area. Catherine instinctively reached for her sister's hand.

"You're doing it wrong." She blurted out, attempting to help. Or hinder.

"Who has the medical training here?"

"Clearly you need to brush up on your people skills." Cath muttered beneath her breath. Nancy sent her a look, quirking an eyebrow in warning.

X x x

As Catherine shuffled downstairs morosely Lily jumped to her feet.

"How is she?"

"Nancy kicked me out." Cath stated glumly. When Lily raised an eyebrow Cath sighed. "She's going to be fine. Just a bump to the head." She ran a hand through her hair, letting her pulse return to normal now the initial shock was over.

"Catherine…" Lily started slowly, licking her lips. "Why didn't you tell me?" She lifted her head slowly, meeting her mother's gaze.

"Because I knew what you'd say."

"What?" Lily feigned ignorance. Catherine scoffed.

"Come on. You mean you don't have a problem with this?"

"Well, it's … unexpected." She conceded.

"Yeah, for you and me both." Cath choked. "Look, we're still figuring this out ourselves." She explained.

"I see." Lily nodded. "So, what's so special about her that you suddenly changed sides? And why now?"

"Well, she wasn't actually the first." Cath confessed sheepishly.

"What?" Lily barked.

"Uh, you remember my friend Lorna, in college?" She continued tentatively. Lily's jaw dropped.

"How long has this been going on Cathy?" Cath shook her head, correcting herself.

"No, not back then. I ran into her a while ago and … you know."

"Oh Catherine." Lily sank heavily into the sofa.

"Sara's been really good to me, mom." Catherine promised softly. "Really good." Lily just sighed and shook her head.

"I hope you know what you're doing."

Before Catherine could formulate an answer, Nancy appeared at the bottom of the stairs.

"She's fine." She held up her hands before Cath could tear into her. "She's just getting dressed." Without waiting for more information, Catherine dodged around her and darted upstairs, leaving her mother and sister alone.

Lily looked up at Nancy coldly. "You knew."

"Yeah." She agreed hesitantly. "Look, I'm not happy about it either but maybe it's just something she needs to get out of her system. A mid-life crisis or something."

"And if it's not?" Lily pressed. Nancy shrugged, releasing a breath.

"Then we just need to be supportive and … deal with it."

X x x

"If you feel at all ill I want you to tell Catherine. And if she says you have to go to hospital then you are going." Nancy instructed the brunette, who barely nodded as she sipped on her tea sullenly. Nancy turned, calling over her shoulder. "You hear that sis? You are officially in charge of her."

"I can live with that." She smirked, winking at Sara.

"Cathy." Lily tugged her aside, leaving Nancy to check over Sara once more.

"Whatever you want to say, can you please save it 'til later?" Cath begged, to no avail.

"Look, if this is what you need to do to make you happy then that's fine." Lily assured her to Catherine's utmost surprise. "But, that doesn't mean that you have to cut your friends out too."

"Mom…" Cath rolled her eyes, sensing where this was going.

"Call Laura."

X x x

As much as she hated to admit it, her mother was right. She did feel better for having made up with the girls.

Not that they had 'made up' as such; so far no one had mentioned her 'episode' as it had become known. But it still felt nice to slip back into a comfortable routine again. For a moment she was actually starting to think that she could have it all.

"So Catherine," Debs called, wrenching her from her thoughts. "What ever happened between you and that guy? Anything ever come of that?"

"Who?" Cath frowned.

"Mr Toy-Boy that you were seeing." Karen jumped in. Catherine scanned her memory, trying to recall this conversation. Inwardly she groaned as the image of a chirpy sales person and a jersey dress flashed before her eyes. Her first date with Sara.

"Oh, him." She feigned reminiscence, "no, it didn't work out." She lied through her teeth, waving a disregarding hand.

"Awe." Laura attempted to sound like she cared. "So, is there anyone else instead?" Catherine bit her lip, choosing her words carefully.

"I'm off men." She settled on at last. The ladies laughed, playing along jokily. After all, it was not the first time they had heard that from the blonde's mouth.

But it was the first time it was true.

X x x

"Hey girls." Warrick greeted warmly as they entered the locker room, his trained green eyes latching onto Sara and following her closely. "Hey, what happened?" He tapped his forehead. Nick turned around, eyeing the brunette too.

"I slipped in the shower." She answered, feeling her cheeks go red.

"What were you doing?" Greg asked playfully, earning him a light smack in the shoulder from her.

"Are you alright?" Nicky asked, a worried frown on his face.

"She's fine." Cath answered without thinking. When the boys sent her surprised stares she blushed, exchanging a look with Sara. "She called me after it happened; I had Nancy check her over." She bluffed hurriedly.

"Wow. Smart thinking." Warrick nodded at Sara, who merely shrugged, trying to hide her smile.

At that moment Grissom wandered in and stopped short, narrowing his eyes at her.

"What happened?" He asked without acknowledgment of anyone else in the room.

"I slipped in the shower. It's nothing." She attempted to placate him.

"Why?" He asked. She blinked at him.

"Well, I didn't mean to." She assured, eliciting a giggle from Greg.

"You must be stressed." He diagnosed. "You should go home." Sara laughed softly while the boys tried to conceal their amusement.

"I'm fine. I don't need time off."

"You could have concussion." He pointed out.

"I do not have concussion. I'm fine." She repeated, rolling her eyes.

"You know," Cath interjected. "If there's a chance she could have concussion then she can't be at work." Sara blinked at her, starting to wonder whose side her girlfriend was on when the blonde continued. "But she really shouldn't be left alone."

And the penny dropped.

"No, you're right." Grissom frowned thoughtfully.

"I could take her to my house." Catherine suggested slyly. Sara bit her lip, trying not to laugh.

"Good idea." Grissom agreed. "I'll go see if I can pull someone of swing."

The boys started to file out with the supervisor, offering Sara sympathetic smiles on the way. Greg shuffled out last behind Grissom, a pout on his boyish face.

"How hard do I have to hit my head to go home with Catherine?" He asked piteously.

Alone, Catherine's lips spread into a feral grin. "Well, Miss Sidle, it appears you and I have the night off … and I'm under strict orders not to let you out of my sight."

"You're a devious woman Catherine Willows." Sara laughed.


	20. Out of the Blue

**Sorry for the delay in posting this one, been dying of cold all weekend :( But I hope you like, let me know what you think**

**KC x**

**x x x x**_**  
><strong>_

_**Out of the Blue**_

"No!" Sara groaned, burying her head beneath the pillow. She felt Catherine lean over her and switch the alarm clock off, feeling the bed shift as the blonde got up. "No." She repeated, reaching out blindly for her girlfriend. She heard a soft chuckle, feeling a hand trail lightly across her shoulder blades.

"Morning honey." Cath sang sweetly.

"Where are you going?" Sara grumbled, sitting up and leaning off the bed in a failed attempt grab her.

"I told the girls I'd meet them in town." Cath explained, purposefully remaining out of Sara's reach as she started to get dressed.

"That's not fun." Sara pouted sadly, eliciting a giggle from Catherine, who sent her girlfriend a sympathetic smile.

"Awe, are you going to miss me that much?" she joked playfully, turning around to pull her jeans on. Sara took the moment to snatch Cath's sweater from the bottom of the bed. When Catherine turned back around she found the brunette had curled back up, clutching the garment tightly. She laughed, stalking back to the bed.

"You're going to have to fight me for it." Sara mumbled, sensing the woman's eyes on her.

"Is that right?" Cath asked coyly, leaning down to press a kiss against her cheek while one hand crept up her back. "In that case…" her fingers danced lightly across her soft skin before grabbing her side, making the brunette jump and effectively releasing the sweater. Cath grabbed it triumphantly, grinning at her scowling girlfriend. "Nice try though, honey." She pecked her lips softly.

"That's not cool." Sara mumbled, throwing her legs out of bed and sitting up properly.

"It's not my fault you're ticklish." Catherine pointed out.

"Doesn't stop you from using it to your advantage." Sara glowered. Catherine laughed, running a hand through Sara's hair as she drifted past her.

"True." She agreed calmly. "But it's so much fun."

"Evil woman." Sara mocked, tugging a t-shirt on. Catherine slid onto her lap, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"Yeah, but that's why you love me." She grinned sweetly. "Listen baby, I've got to go but I was thinking I could cook you dinner before work?"

"Sure." Sara smiled, resting her head on Catherine's shoulder. "Providing you make it into town…" she continued, rolling back into the bed. Cath fell atop her with a yelp, her semi-clad frame automatically moulding itself to Sara's body.

X x x

"So Catherine," Laura said after a silence had fallen over the group as they sipped coffee in a quiet corner of the café, "who's this new beau of yours?"

"What?" Cath snapped back from her thoughts so fast she nearly got whiplash.

"Don't play dumb with me lady, we know there's a new guy in your life." The blonde retorted.

"Well you're wrong." She stated with her best poker face, taking a long mouthful of her drink. Laura scowled.

"James saw you making out with someone on the back of a motorbike outside a club." Cath nearly choked on her drink.

"Ha, I knew it!" Her friends cheered gleefully. "Who is it?"

"He must have imagined it." She insisted, trying to keep her image of cool under their unwavering stares.

"Yeah, that's what happened." Karen rolled her eyes sarcastically. "Come on, give us a name."

"There is no guy." She repeated, trying not to laugh. Deborah's face morphed into a frown.

"Hey," She called, sending Catherine a baffled look. "How do you make out with someone while riding a motorbike?"

Karen shook her head and Laura rolled her eyes impatiently. Catherine laughed, almost enjoying watching them go crazy over her mysterious love life.

"Come on Cathy, we can do this all day." Karen teased. Cath leant back in her seat, fiddling with the spoon in her coffee nervously.

"It's really not what you think." She said at last.

"Alright, whatever you say." Laura shrugged dubiously, folding her arms. "But we're going to keep trying until we get it out of you."

"You'll be trying for a while." Cath muttered as she took another mouthful.

X x x

As they wandered through the mall, discussing the tacky Christmas decorations and the masses of people scurrying frantically from shop to shop, Catherine's gaze settled on something that brought a surprised smile to her face.

"I'll be back in a minute." She said to her friends, sidling over to Sara who was window shopping with her back to Cath. With a devious grin, she grabbed her waist, making the brunette jump. "Hi." She smiled.

"Hi," Sara greeted, surprised to see Cath. When the blonde peered around her to see what she had been admiring Sara attempted futilely to cover the window. Catherine glanced up at the name of the store, raising an eyebrow at her girlfriend.

It was a jewellery store.

A few feet away, her friends were watching the pair with piqued curiosity.

"Who's the woman?" Karen asked.

"Got me." Laura frowned at them warily.

"It's not what it looks like." Sara said. "It's not for you." As soon as the words left her lips she realised how that had sounded and laughed nervously at Catherine's surprised expression. "That came out wrong."

"Hmm." Cath nodded suspiciously.

"You don't trust me?" Sara enquired playfully with a sweet smile.

"Did I say that?" Catherine asked innocently. Sara chuckled, suddenly noticing that they were being watched.

"I think your friends are waiting for you." She pointed out. Cath nodded, remembering that they were in public. She was about to step away but in a moment of boldness she leant forward and kissed Sara's lips.

"I guess I'll see you tomorrow." She mumbled. "Enjoy your shopping."

When she returned to her friends, they were staring at her with matching expressions of slack-jawed shock.

"What?" She shrugged.

"What the hell was that?" Laura stuttered. Catherine smiled devilishly.

"I told you I'm off men."

X x x

"Have you lost your mind?" Karen barked at her. Catherine laughed softly, spinning around to face them.

"Seriously, are you crazy?" Debs continued, flabbergasted.

"No." She managed at last. "No, actually. This feels right."

"You're serious." Karen repeated.

"This is a joke." Laura said with a stony expression. "Like that mosque thing." The others all looked at her, slowly catching on.

"Oh, of course." Karen said with a dry laugh.

But Catherine pursed her lips, shaking her head slowly.

"Guys, this isn't a joke." She said, calmer now. "Sara and I are together. We have been for a while." One by one the women sobered up.

Deborah looked around her to where Sara had disappeared into the store.

"Sara?" She repeated. "As I your colleague?"

"That's the one." Cath agreed with a fond smile.

"Wait!" Karen jumped in, holding her hands up. "That guy you were seeing a while ago… the dress?"

"Our first date." Catherine grinned sheepishly.

"This cannot be happening." Laura said, running a hand through her hair. "Catherine, what's gotten into you?"

"Look, Sara makes me happy. She treats me better than anyone else ever has. Now, you guys don't have to accept this if you don't want, but I would really like you to at least get to know her before you judge." They all exchanged uncertain looks with each other as Catherine looked on hopefully. "Please?"


	21. Seed of Doubt

**Again, apologies for the delay**

**x x x x**

_**Seed of Doubt**_

Sara tilted her head back, letting the afternoon sun warm her face. She was vaguely aware of people staring at her but she honestly did not care.

"I can't believe she's here." Laura tutted, shaking her head.

"Oh, speaking of unwanted visitors, Madeleine at 2oClock." Karen hissed conspiratorially, nodding her head in the direction of the approaching mother. The three women all turned in tandem as the bleached-blonde wandered into their group, her piercing blue eyes fixed on the mysterious new brunette.

"Who's the newbie?" She asked suspiciously.

"That's Catherine Willows' new girlfriend." Laura said with a smirk. Madeleine's head whipped around so fast she nearly got whiplash.

"What?" She barked. "Catherine Willows? She's…"

"Yep." Karen agreed proudly. "She's switched teams."

"No way!" The blonde howled, spinning on her three-inch heels to marvel at the brunette.

Suddenly the school doors flew open and a mass of children started pouring out into the sun-drenched yard. Lindsey skidded to a halt in the doorway, scanning the area for her mother. When her eyes settled on Sara her little face lit up and she launched herself at the woman.

Sara, lost in her own little world, looked down just in time to catch the whirlwind, swinging her onto her hip elegantly.

"Hey munchkin." She grinned.

The women watched her easy motions with a strange sense of awe.

"Mommy?" William whined, tugging on Deborah's jacket. He held his arms out to be picked up like Lindsey had been but Debs shrugged him off.

"Not now Billy, Mommy has a bad back." She lied, her gaze still fixed on Sara.

"I can't believe it's serious enough for Catherine to let her pick her up from school." Karen scoffed. "Something's gotten into that woman, I swear."

"You know," Laura said thoughtfully, her eyes following Sara as she walked out of the school gates hand-in-hand with Lindsey, "maybe we should take Cath up on her offer; get to know Sara better."

"What?" Karen asked in shock. "You're not serious?" Laura sent her a look, a devious smirk spreading across her lips.

"It can't hurt. After all, who was it that said knowledge is power?"

"Shakespeare?" Debs guessed, earning her a glare from the others.

X x x

"So, Cath." Karen said after an awkward silence. "How's work?" Catherine sent her an odd look.

"You've never asked that before." She pointed out. Karen shrugged uncomfortably, glancing around the room. They rarely met at Catherine's house for coffee; it was usually in Laura's modern individually-designed kitchen or Deborah's converted manor house with the heated outdoor pool.

But they had met at Catherine's today with the sole intention of scrutinising this new-fangled relationship of hers. Cath was initially thrilled when they had agreed to get to know Sara better before dismissing it, however now she was starting to regret it as her friends scanned her imperfect home and sipped her cheap coffee.

Sara, oblivious to the discomfort she was causing inside, was tinkering with her motorbike on the driveway; with Lindsey's assistance of course.

"You know, I heard that Stephanie James' husband went on a 'business trip' with his assistant to, get this, Hawaii." Deborah jumped in excitedly to ease some of the tension.

"Doesn't he work in finance?" Cath asked, relieved to be out of the spotlight for a while.

"Yep. And Stephanie has no idea."

"She must suspect something." Laura scoffed. "Why would an investment banker need to go to Hawaii?"

"She thinks they were in Kansas." Debs laughed gleefully. "I don't know how he explained the tan."

"Well, if a man isn't getting what he wants at home …" Karen let the sentence trail off, suddenly recalling Catherine's failed marriage. And once again they were plunged into an awkward silence, until the pattering of little feet sounded and Lindsey arrived covered in oil and sporting a big grin. Catherine burst out laughing, looking her filthy daughter up and down. Sara followed behind wiping her hands on her jeans, her face streaked.

"Don't mind me," She waved briefly. "The oil tank threw a tantrum." The women all looked at her in a mixture of shock and bemusement, while Catherine seemed greatly amused by her appearance.

"Is it all fixed now?" She asked between giggles, following her girlfriend into the adjoining kitchen where she was washing her hands.

"I hope so." Sara grinned, looking down at Lindsey. "I suppose I should clean up." Catherine hid a smile, nodding in agreement.

"I'll make you some coffee." She promised, watching Sara swing the child onto her hip and disappear upstairs. Laura pursed her lips, watching the brunette walk away.

"Cath, can I use your bathroom?" She asked politely.

"Top of the stairs, on your right." Cath directed, too busy pouring Sara a drink to notice the smirk on her friend's face.

X x x

She glanced briefly into the bathroom, out of pure nosiness really, before creeping up to Catherine's bedroom. The door was ajar and she could see far enough inside to observe what was going on without being seen.

Sara was half-dressed in clean jeans, rifling through her clothes for a shirt. Lindsey was sat on the bed attempting to get changed. Laura heard a squeal from the girl as she got her head stuck in the t-shirt. Sara laughed at her struggle before helping her to get free. Laura smiled with glee as she watched the brunette re-dress the little girl, a twisted idea planting itself in her mind.

Silently and unnoticed, she slipped back downstairs.

X x x

"Hey Catherine," Laura asked lazily once Karen and Deborah had gone to collect their respective children from the overpaid Nannies. "How well do you really know Sara?"

"What do you mean?" Cath frowned at her.

"Well, I … never mind, it's probably nothing."

"What?" Catherine pressed, intrigued. Laura sat forward, trying to hold her serious expression in place.

"I was just thinking that it seems a bit odd that she's so interested in spending time with Lindsey."

"What?" Cath laughed softly. "She's just getting to know her. That's a good thing. Isn't it?"

"Yeah, I'm sure it is. It's just … earlier she was helping Lindsey get dressed and … it just seems weird that someone without kids is so keen to hang around them."

Catherine's face fell as she realised what Laura was implying. She threw a brief glance to the kitchen were Sara and Lindsey were baking cookies. Lindsey was sat on the countertop and they appeared to be having immense fun with the flour, both in a fit of giggles.

"No." She said instantly. "Whatever you're thinking you're wrong."

"Look, I'm not accusing her of anything." The blonde promised softly. "All I'm saying is be careful."

"Sara and I have worked together for years. I know her." Catherine insisted.

"Okay." Laura sat back in her seat dismissively. "But look at it this way: if she were a guy, would you still trust her?"


	22. Skeletons in the Closet

_**Skeletons in the Closet**_

Catherine ran a hand through her hair, releasing a slow breath. Try as she might, she could not get Laura's words out of her head. She didn't believe her friend's ramblings for a second of course, but since that conversation another thought had planted itself firmly in her mind and refused to budge. And the more she thought about it, the more it made sense to her.

"Hey?" Sara called softly, dragging her out of her thoughts. "You okay?"

"Yeah, sorry. Just thinking." She smiled, sitting on the edge of the bed where her girlfriend was already curled up.

"Care to share?" Sara yawned tiredly. Cath was about to decline but she stopped herself.

"It's nothing." She mumbled at last. "It's just something that Laura said earlier." She licked her lips, contemplating how to phrase this without scaring her off. "You and Lindsey seem to be getting on really well."

Sara's tired eyes flicked open, scanning Catherine's tentative expression carefully; her sharp mind read the message behind her words clearly.

"They think that's weird." She guessed correctly. "And you…"

"I think it's great that you get on." Cath jumped in hurriedly before she could get the wrong idea. "It just made me think…we haven't really talked about it."

"About what?" Sara frowned, sitting up properly.

"Well, about Linds." Cath cleared her throat nervously. "When I've dated guys I've always been careful to keep her separate from my love life. And with you … I don't know, it just never occurred to me to do that."

"And, this is a bad thing?" The brunette asked, puzzled.

"No." Catherine laughed softly, reaching out to grip Sara's hand. "No, honey. It just dawned on me today that this is the first relationship I've had where I can picture us … as a family." She softened her voice. "And I never thought I would have that again."

"Me neither." Sara whispered, running her thumb over the back of Catherine's hand in gentle circles. "And, you know that I would never hurt Lindsey right?"

"Of course." Cath nodded, inching closer on the bed. Sara swallowed hard, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear nervously.

"I just…I used to leave school at the end of the day and watch my classmates run to their parents." Catherine sat still, listening intently as Sara started to pour her heart out. Despite their initial conversation on the matter, they had never discussed Sara's past; she always got the impression Sara wanted to leave it dead and buried. "I would walk home alone. And when I got there I would be yelled at, or ignored, or abused. My homework was ripped up, my things were destroyed. I always felt like I was in the way." Catherine reached out silently to wipe away Sara's tears: she would bet the brunette didn't even know she was crying. "I never wanted Lindsey to feel like that. I want her to feel like the most spoilt, loved little girl in the world."

Catherine bit her lip, trying to swallow the rush of emotions swirling inside of her. She opened her mouth to tell Sara that she wanted the same; to tell her she loved her. But what came out seemed to make much more sense.

"Move in with me."

X x x

"Hey Cath!" Debs called from the kitchen. "How do you work your coffee machine?"

"Hold on," Catherine called back, pushing herself off the couch. She dodged around the toys scattered around the lounge, carefully stepping over children as she made her way to the kitchen. Alone with the little ones, Laura spotted an opportunity. She checked that Cath was out of earshot and beckoned Lindsey over.

"Hey Linds." She called softly, gripping her lightly by the arms. "So, Sara stays over here a lot huh?"

"Yep. She's mommy's girlfriend." The little girl said proudly. "She said she's going to take me to the zoo this weekend."

"Really? Wow!" Karen gasped, joining in. "So, you and Sara spend a lot of time together."

"Yeah." The miniature blonde nodded, seemingly getting bored of the conversation.

"Hey Lindsey," Laura continued before she could wander off. "Has Sara ever hurt you? Or touched you?"

"What do you mean?" The child frowned, cocking her head to one side.

"Has she ever made you feel uncomfortable, or…"

"What the hell?" Catherine froze in the doorway, observing the scene before her with horror. Debs appeared behind her looking just as confused. "Lindsey, baby, come here." She picked her confused daughter up, her gaze fixed on her friends' sheepish faces.

"Cat? What's wrong?" Sara asked, materialising at her side when she heard the commotion.

"Take her outside." She instructed, passing Lindsey to her. Sara frowned, not understanding, but did as asked and took the child into the back yard, ensuring to slide the glass doors closed behind them.

"I can't believe you." Cath hissed when they were out of earshot. "I cannot believe you would try to … to drag something out of Lindsey to use against Sara."

"We were just looking out for her." Karen interjected.

"You were putting words in her mouth!" Cath contradicted angrily.

"Why are you so certain about this? Just because you want to go out and try new things doesn't mean you have to subject a child to them." Laura stood up daringly, risking the wrath of the CSI. "How do you know that Sara wouldn't hurt her?"

"Because I know Sara. I know she would never hurt a child."

"Come on." The blonde scoffed. "Are you saying that even in a moment of anger she wouldn't lash out? You don't know that Catherine."

"We're just looking out for your daughter." Karen jumped in. "Since you aren't."

"No." Catherine insisted. "Sara … she's not like that."

"Like what?" Laura pressed.

"Like her parents!" Cath snapped before she could take it back. The women blinked at her in shock. Slowly, she lowered herself onto the couch, running a hand through her hair. "Sara was abused as a child. She never got any affection so she wants to show it to Lindsey as much as she can. She wants Lindsey to have the childhood she didn't have." Cath explained softly, her gaze automatically seeking out Sara and Lindsey playing in the back yard. "She would never treat a child like she was treated."

"Well, okay..." Laura nodded, taken aback by this information. "But that doesn't mean you can trust her."

"I do trust her." Cath retorted softly. "In fact, I wasn't going to tell you this today but ... Sara and I are moving in together."

There was a moment of stunned silence as her friends absorbed this information. Finally, Laura stood up and grabbed her purse.

"Well." She said curtly. "I think you're making a huge mistake; for you and Lindsey." She sent the other two women a look; one which made them both jump up and start collected their children together. "But you know what Catherine, it's your life. Do what you want."

Cath watched them leave with a hurt expression. She almost caught Debs' eye on the way, but the woman seemed to be resolutely avoiding that. The only one who met her gaze was Laura, who sent her a cold stare from the doorway.

"As long as you think this is acceptable, I don't want my children hanging around with Lindsey."

X x x

"So, apparently Cath's new girlfriend's family history is a little shady." Laura divulged gleefully to a disinterested James as he checked his emails.

"Uh huh." He nodded, not really paying attention.

"If Catherine wants to go out and be a lesbian that's fine but to live with her! And to subject poor Lindsey to it as well, it's really not something a child should see!" She scoffed judgementally. "And especially not with someone who's clearly damaged anyway."

"Uh huh." He hummed in agreement. She nudged him roughly.

"Hey, are you listening to me?"

"Yeah, yes I'm listening." He snapped. "Cath's floozy had a rough childhood."

"More than rough; the way Cath was talking it sounds like there's more than meets the eye. Can you imagine if there's some deep dark mystery? I bet she would do anything to keep it secret." James nodded along silently as his wife's mind started to run away with itself. "Hey, I bet you could find out." She smacked him none-too-lightly on the arm.

"Probably." He agreed.

"Well?" She pressed. He looked up, finally getting the hint.

"What's her surname again?" He asked, rolling his eyes.

"Sidle."

"Never heard of it."

"But you can find it, right?" She asked eagerly. He flashed him a devilish smile.

"If there's a story, I can find it."


	23. The Road

**_The Road_**

****"Alright Cathy," Lily sighed, taking a long sip of her hot drink. "Why did you summon us here?"

"What? I can't ask my mother and sister round for coffee without it being suspicious?" She asked innocently, topping up Nancy mug. Her sister watched in dismay, having worked a night shift and already had enough caffeine to power a small car.

"Come on Catherine, I know you." Lily said, her maternal instincts playing out in her voice. "What's going on?" Cath pursed her lips, lowering herself into a chair.

"Well, now that you mention it there was something I wanted to run by you." She toyed with her mug, studiously avoiding eye contact with them both. She could feel her family's eyes on her, waiting for her big announcement. "Sara and I have been talking and … I asked her to move in with me."

There was a moment of silence while her relatives took this in. Catherine tapped her fingers on the table nervously. "She said yes, in case you're wondering." She added hurriedly, flicking her gaze up.

"Okay." Lily said slowly. "And, you really think this is a good idea?"

"Yes, I do." Cath breathed, holding her mother's gaze.

"What does Lindsey think?" Nancy asked, breaking the staring contest that was going on. Cath shifted in her seat.

"We haven't actually told her yet." She explained softly. "We are going to … we just haven't found the right time." Lily scoffed but Cath chose to ignore it. "Sara's actually out with her now."

"Well the longer you wait…"

"The harder it'll be; I know, I know. Save me the sermon." She rolled her eyes. "We will. I just need to work out what I'm going to say."

"I hope you know what you're doing." Lily murmured with a knowing look. Catherine looked up, meeting her gaze.

"I do."

X x x

Catherine flittered around the kitchen anxiously, intermittently casting glances at her daughter who was quietly doing her homework at the table.

She knew that Lindsey liked Sara a lot. That was not the issue at hand; her worry was that the little girl might see Catherine moving someone in as an attempt to replace Eddie in their lives.

How do you explain to a child that you don't love her dead father anymore?

"When's Sara coming back?" The girl spoke up, interrupting her thoughts.

"Soon baby, she just had to go home for some things."

"She should live here." Catherine dropped the plate she was pretending to wash back in the sink, spinning on her heel to face Lindsey.

"What?" She asked, her voice a little higher than expected.

"Sara should live with us. Then she wouldn't have to go home." Linds repeated calmly, putting her pen down and closing her work book. Catherine was practically giddy with glee at her daughter's simple words. "Can I go watch TV?"

"Mm hmm." Cath nodded, not daring to speak. Lindsey scampered off, leaving Catherine to dwell in her happiness, however short lived it might be. She heard the front door slam closed.

"Hello." The voice called through the house. Cath frowned, exhaling deeply.

"Mom." She greeted coolly, returning to pretending to wash the dishes.

"So," Lily said, ambling over and making herself comfortable at the breakfast bar. "Has Sara moved in yet?"

"No." Cath rolled her eyes. "She has to deal with her apartment first."

"And Lindsey?"

"She's happy about it." Cath lied. Well, it wasn't a total lie. So, Catherine hadn't exactly told her about it, but she knew the child would be happy when she found out.

"Good." Lily said glibly. "Then I guess it's all working out for you."

"Yeah. I guess it is." She agreed curtly. Lily pushed herself off the stool and moved around to look her daughter in the eye. "Look, of course I'm happy for you Catherine, I just hope you realise that it's not going to be as easy as you make it sound."

"Mom…"

"Some people are not going to take kindly to this." She continued despite Cat's protestations.

"People like you?" The CSI accused. Lily's face softened.

"Just, don't expect too much of people." She patted her daughter's hand and turned to leave.

"We know what we're doing." Catherine called after her. Lily stopped, her back to her daughter. She opened her mouth to speak but thought better of it. Catherine watched her walk outside with a resigned sigh.

X x x

"Hey Laura." James hollered, never tearing his eyes from the screen. His wife's feet pattered in from the kitchen.

"I've got to go James," She snapped. "I've got a PTA meeting tonight."

"Well, you might want to be late." He continued, a devious smile twitching at his lips. "I think I found something on Catherine's girl."

X x x

"So, we have decided on a bake sale to fundraise for the new sports equipment." Annabelle folded her hands on the lectern, scanning the room. "And for convenience sake we can hold it during the termly parent's evening this week. We can use it as a chance to catch up before the Christmas break." She chirped. A few people raised hands with pressing questions. Cath rolled her eyes, doing her best to pretend she was not bored. She loathed these PTA meetings with a passion, but her reputation was hanging by a thread as it was; she could at least offer some proof that she was a good mother.

"Right then." Annabelle clapped once people had finished asking questions. "I'll see you all on Friday at the end of school. Bring snacks and don't be late."

Everyone started to filter off into small groups, chattering and discussing what low-fat, high-fibre snacks they were going to bake for the sale and how early they would have to start baking to get them ready for three-fifteen.

Purposefully standing off to one side on her own, Catherine stacked her chair and slipped her jacket on.

"Catherine." Laura appeared at her side, her usual smug grin back in place. "You'll be coming on Friday?"

"Of course." Cath nodded. "I wouldn't miss it for the world." Truth was if she had it her way she would only be going to the parent's evening but something told her she wouldn't have a choice about the fundraising.

"Good." Laura nodded, subtly glancing around them. There were enough people nearby to overhear their conversation. "I suppose you'll be bringing your girlfriend." She said in an unnecessarily loud voice. Catherine felt her cheeks redden as several pairs of eyes latched onto her. She swallowed hard, meeting Laura's gaze.

"Yes actually, Sara will be coming." She said firmly. "Is there a problem with that?" Laura narrowed her eyes. She knew that inside Cath was shaking but on the outside she was holding strong.

"I suppose not." Laura bristled, turning her back.

"Good." Cath said coldly, relief flooding her body. She pursed her lips, casting a sly glance around at the spectators. "Then Sara and I will be seeing you on Friday."

X x x

"Hey," Sara greeted, pecking Cath's lips briefly. "How was the meeting?"

"Good." She answered, walking around her girlfriend into the kitchen. "You're coming to parent's evening in Friday."

"I'm sorry?" Sara frowned, following her. Cath turned to face her sheepishly.

"They cornered me." She offered weakly. "I could really use the support."

"Okay." Sara agreed tentatively. "Do I have to do anything?"

"Just turn up, awe at Lindsey's work and ignore the snide remarks." Sara seemed to think about this for a moment.

"I can do that." She nodded at last. Catherine smiled, kissing her lips softly.

"Thank you. You're my star."

X x x

"I don't think I can do this." Catherine halted their movements, almost pulling Sara over with her sudden stop. The brunette turned to her.

"Hey, it's alright." She promised. "All you have to do is listen to some nice things about your daughter and then if you want we can leave."

"What about the bake sale?" Cath pointed out, on the verge of hyperventilating.

"Screw the bake sale. Lindsey's a dancer, what does she need new hockey sticks for?" Catherine laughed, shaking her head at Sara's dry humour. A few other parents nearby sent them a look at her outburst but she didn't notice. Sara had that effect on her. She took a deep breath and flicked her strawberry-blonde waves over her shoulder.

"Okay, let's get this over with."

With a deep breath, she pushed the heavy door to the hall open; amid a mass of tinsel and child-made decorations there were several tables laid out with snacks and brightly coloured juice.

"It's like Santa's grotto." Sara commented, her startled wide eyes scanning the scene with bafflement. She felt Cath tighten her grip on her hand as they walked into the mass of parents. Something about these people seemed to make her girlfriend unnaturally nervous. Leaning closer, she whispered something in her ear that made the blonde relax just a little.

"Catherine!" A dark haired woman waved frantically, making her way through the crowd towards her.

"Oh lord." Catherine muttered, plastering fake smile on her face. "Annabelle." She greeted tightly.

"Hi, Laura told me you might be bringing someone." She looked Sara up and down, her green eyes glancing over their conjoined hands.

"Yes, this is Sara." Cath leant into her slightly, taking support from her body. Sara, unfazed by the disapproving stares, smiled warmly.

"So, where's Lindsey?" She asked when the awkward silence became too much. Before she could answer, the blonde whirlwind appeared from nowhere and wrapped her arms around Sara's waist. "Hey kiddo." She grinned, tousling her hair softly.

"Come see my artwork!" The child said excitedly, dragging her by the hand back into the corridor. Catherine watched them go with a fond smile.

"So, you and Sara…" Annabelle asked.

"It's going well." Cath cut her off bluntly. "Where do you want this?" She held up the snacks she had spent half the afternoon making.

"Uh, on the table by the door." Catherine placed the goods down, taking the moment to straighten her clothes and run a hand through her hair before turning to find her girls.

X x x

"So, on the whole Lindsey's doing very well." Ms. Stone sat forward, folding her hands on the desk. Catherine smiled awkwardly, fidgeting in her seat. She had never been a massive fan of Lindsey's second grade teacher and now she couldn't help but feel like the stern woman was judging her every breath.

Sara, on the other hand, seemed remarkably relaxed under the teacher's scrutiny.

"That's great." She smiled, sending Cath an odd look. "Right?"

"Well, there was one incident today." Ms Stone shuffled in her seat, avoiding their eye contact. "She got in a bit of a scrap with a couple of other children."

"A scrap?" Sara repeated. "As in a fight?" Catherine sent her a startled look. Lindsey hadn't been caught fighting since Eddie died.

"It wasn't really a fight. A few words and a bit of pushing. It was all broken up very swiftly."

"What was it about?" Catherine asked, not interested in hearing the schools discipline disclaimer. Ms Stone took a deep breath, leaning back in her seat.

"Another child was making fun of her for…"

"For…" Cath pressed, feeling Sara grip her hand tighter in-between their plastic chairs. Ms Stone cleared her that nervously.

"Well, about you and …" she gestured between the two of them. Catherine's jaw dropped.

"Lindsey's being bullied because of our relationship?"

"I'm afraid to say so, yes." The teacher nodded, her stoic expression turning soft for the first time.

"Can you tell us the names of the kids involved?" Sara asked quietly. Cath didn't know what she was planning to do with the information but to be honest she was curious herself.

"Rebecca Hamley, Zoe Carpenter and..."

"Sebastian Jenkins." Cath finished off for her.

She should have guessed.

X x x

"I cannot believe them." She hissed, pacing outside the classroom.

"Cat, calm down." Sara attempted to catch her flailing arms as she wore a hole in the floor.

"I cannot believe that they would drag their kids into this!" She continued, fuming.

"Hey, hey. I know how upset you are." Sara managed to catch her, swinging her around the look into her blazing blue eyes. "But there's a little girl in the next room who is probably feeling even more jaded then us." Catherine's face fell. She ran a hand over her face.

"You're right." She agreed softly.

Hand in hand, they headed back to the hall, where Lindsey was chattering with a group of children. When she spotted her parents she scampered over, a shy grin on her face.

"How did I do?" She asked. Sara bent down and scooped her up, balancing her on her hip.

"You did great kiddo." She promised. Cath leant up to kiss her cheek softly, running a thumb over her soft skin. She was about to bring up what the teacher had just told them but her daughter's bright, sweet little smile just broke her heart. Glancing around them to the group of kids, the very children who had taunted her, she sighed.

"Come on sweetheart, let's go home."

"What about the bake sale?" Cath sent Sara a sideways grin.

"Screw the bake sale."

"Can we get pizza?" Lindsey asked hopefully. Cath released a strangled laugh, shaking her head at the simplicity of childhood innocence.

"Yes honey, we can get pizza."

"Hey, maybe we could rent a movie too?" Sara suggested, already making her way through the crowd towards the parking lot.

Catherine stopped in the threshold, watching them walk across the yard. She noticed how Sara tightened her grip on the child, shielding her against the cold dusk air. A small smile twitched at her lips.

It may not be the perfect relationship, but they might just be able to make it work.


	24. Blast from the Past

**Sorry for the delay over Christmas, hope Santa didn't disappoint anyone. I wrote a Festive story instead, but am back on with this one now :) Soo...**

**x x x x**

_**Blast from the Past**_

"Mommy! Sara!" Their door flew open and a heavy weight landed on the foot of the bed. Sara stirred, pulling herself to a seated position only to be met by a pair of bright blue eyes.

"Cat, your daughter's up." She mumbled, smiling at the child and nudging her partner under the covers. Cath moaned, rolling onto her back.

"Morning sweetie." She murmured sleepily, sitting up.

"It's Christmas!" Lindsey squealed, clambering off the bed and running into the landing. "Hurry up!" The women laughed softly, sharing a fond smile at her innocent excitement.

"Happy Christmas." Sara whispered, finding Catherine's hand in the blankets.

"Happy Christmas darling." Cath leant forward, catching her lips in a sweet kiss.

"Mommy! Sara! Santa's been!" A voice hollered from downstairs.

"Come on." Catherine climbed out of bed, tugging Sara with her. "Maybe Santa's brought a present for you, too."

"I already have what I want." Sara mumbled, trailing behind her lover.

X x x

Sara stretched contentedly, resting her hands on her stomach. Catherine stood up, running a hand affectionately through her girlfriend's hair as she moved to the sink.

"Mommy, can I go play?" Lindsey asked politely, sliding out of her seat.

"Of course." Cath bent down and kissed her forehead. "When we're all cleared up maybe we could put one of your new DVDs on?" She suggested.

"I'll go pick one." Lindsey agreed, scampering into the living room. Catherine, who had gone back to washing up, jumped when Sara's arms snuck around her waist and stilled her motions.

"What are you doing?" She asked, instinctively leaning back into the brunette's embrace.

"Come with me." Sara mumbled, leading her away from the sink. "I have one more present."

"You do..?" Cath trailed behind her curiously.

"You remember when you saw me outside the jewellery store, and I said it wasn't for you?"

"Hmm." She nodded, narrowing her eyes suspiciously.

"Well, it was for Lindsey." She explained, producing a small box from behind her back. Catherine flicked her eyes between the box and Sara.

"Linds." She called, not tearing her eyes from Sara's. When the child appeared by their sides, Sara handed her the box and crouched down beside her.

Lindsey took the box with an excited smile, shaking it softly. Catherine knelt down as well, equally as intrigued to see what it was.

As she opened it, they both peeped inside. And glinting back at them was a silver charm bracelet with seven little charms hanging off it.

"Oh wow." Cath gasped, helping Lindsey to extract it from the box. Sara chewed her lip nervously

"There's one charm per year." She explained, pointing out a little teddy bear. "See, that one's from when you were born. And that's for when you started dancing." She tapped the little ballet shoes.

"Wow." Lindsey whispered, holding the bracelet up to see all of the charms. She held it out to her mother, who took it and carefully affixed it to her daughter's tiny wrist.

"Sara…it's gorgeous." She whispered, leaning over Lindsey to peck her lips. Sara smiled, her arms tightly wrapped around Lindsey's small waist as the child examined her new present.

X x x

"So, did everyone have a nice Christmas?" Nick asked, sashaying into the break room and collapsing onto the couch. A mass of affirmative answers melted into one.

"I've just seen Jim; by the looks of it he had a good day too." Cath chuckled. "He's not enjoying the repercussions though so be warned if you cross him today."

"I'll be steering clear of that 420 then." Warrick chuckled, gesturing to the files Grissom was sorting out as he stumbled into the room.

"Hey Gil, how's your mom?" Cath asked, settling herself at the centre counter.

"She's good. She says hi." Grissom nodded, turning to the boys. "You guys look surprisingly alert. What did you get up to?"

"A few drinks. And a few more." Nick added with an unmanly giggle.

"Sounds like a good Christmas all round." Cath guessed from their giddiness.

"Yeah," Nick confirmed with a contented grin. "We went to Greg's apartment and had Christmas dinner there."

"Why Greg's?" Grissom asked with a puzzled frown.

"Because I have the games." The young CSI grinned, gesturing to the PlaysSation console.

"Hey Sara," Warrick asked, suddenly noticing the quiet brunette pouring herself a cup of coffee. "Who did you spend Christmas with?" She glanced up, catching Catherine's eye. She shared a small smile with the blonde.

"My family."

X x x

"It's manic." Sara commented, sidling through the crowds. Catherine, clinging to her arm, laughed softly.

"You've never been shopping in the after-Christmas sales before have you?" She guessed.

"No." Sara agreed, swiftly dodging a speeding shopper. "Hey, I was thinking-"

"Hmm, I've warned you about that." Catherine joked. Sara laughed softly.

"I was thinking, maybe we should tell the guys about us. Now that my apartment's sold and we're officially living together."

Catherine pursed her lips, considering the proposal.

"You know; I'm not sure I'm ready for that yet." She confessed softly. "Baby steps, right?" She added with a timid smile. "Beside's, I'm happy with things just as they are." She turned to kiss Sara's lips briefly, inadvertently catching a glimpse of someone she did not expect nor want to see. "Oh no."

"What?" Sara asked, scanning Cath's startled expression. She turned to glance over her shoulder, where a red-headed woman was walking towards her with wide eyes.

"Lorna." Catherine blinked, caught off guard. Sara's jaw dropped as she placed the name.

"Cath, hey." Lorna cleared her throat, glancing uneasily between the two women before her. Sara caught her eye, suddenly feeling uncomfortable.

"Um, why don't I wait for you in there?" She gestured to the nearest shop. Catherine nodded, reluctantly releasing her arm. She watched Sara walk away, taking a deep breath before turning back to Lorna, who was also watching Sara with a wary eye.

"I see you got over your nerves." She commented with a smirk.

"Yes." Cath agreed, swallowing her anxiety. "I guess it was you after all." She added with a snarky courage she didn't actually possess. Lorna appeared taken aback, although she quickly recovered.

"Well, I'm glad to see that you're doing okay." She said softly, casting a glance into the shop where Sara had vanished. "Who is she?"

"A friend." Cath answered instinctively. "We met at work."

"Ah." Lorna nodded, not really interested. "And you two, you're…"

"We live together." Cath answered before she could finish the question.

"Right." Lorna nodded. "Well, congratulations." She shuffled awkwardly on the spot.

"I'd better…" Cath pointed in the direction Sara had gone.

"Yeah, okay." Lorna agreed, a hint of sadness in her voice. "Well, it was nice seeing you again."

Catherine opened her mouth to repay the compliment but found herself unable to do so. Instead, she settled for a brief wave and a nod before turning to find her lover.

When she finally located Sara in the crowded shop, just leaving the checkout, she didn't speak. She walked straight into the brunette's arms without a word, letting the woman hold her for just a moment oblivious to people's stares.

"That bad?" Sara asked softly, hugging her tightly. Cath nodded, not answering.

"You want to go for a coffee?"

"Mhmm." She nodded again.

"Okay." Extracting herself from her girlfriend, Sara took her hand and led her back into the crowded mall corridors.

X x x

Catherine held her untouched coffee, absently watching the people walking past. Sara nudged her hand, getting her attention.

"Should I not ask how it went?" Cath sighed, shrugging.

"How does it ever go when you run into an ex?" She mumbled. "It was awkward."

"But that's not what's bothering you." Sara pointed out knowingly.

"Lorna…she wasn't right for me. And she didn't exactly treat me fantastically." Catherine explained softly, using her spoon to doodle in the cinnamon on top of her coffee just to avoid Sara's gaze. "But I feel like I owe her."

"For what?" Sara frowned. Cath shrugged, dropping her spoon and finally looking up into Sara's questioning chocolate brown eyes.

"For you." She answered simply. "If I hadn't run into Lorna; if we hadn't started dating I may never have realised that…" she let the sentence hang. To be honest, she still hadn't managed to put a name to what she was. But she had Sara, so ultimately she didn't care. "I don't know, I just feel like she made things click."

"Maybe she did." Sara conceded. "But that doesn't mean you owe her anything. She still tried to force you into a relationship that you weren't ready for."

"I know." Cath sighed, reaching out to lace their fingers together across the table. "I want to go home."

"Okay." Sara smiled softly. She reached down, picking up the shopping bag from the last store she had been in and holding it out to the blonde. "Good thing I got this then."

Catherine took the bag, peering inside. It was a DVD.

"I thought you might need cheering up." Sara explained as Catherine handed her the bag back.

"Thank you." She smiled gratefully.

"So, I was thinking wine and chocolate?" Sara suggested, gathering their things together and offering her arm to Cath chivalrously. Catherine sighed contentedly.

"That sounds perfect."


	25. Curveballs Along the Way

_**Curveballs Along the Way**_

They say bad things come in threes. Tonight, Catherine was discovering the truth of that the hard way.

It had been a trying enough shift as it was, and it was only about to get worse…

X x x

"Ms Willows?"

Catherine looked up tiredly, greeted by a woman in a sharp suit who she recognised as a prosecutor general.

"Ah, Miss Ross." She greeted coolly. "What can I do for you?"

Erica Ross was a smart woman and a smart lawyer. She was also a serial adulterer and a good friend of the tables.

"I was in the neighbourhood and thought I'd tell you in person." The lawyer sat down, producing a file from her briefcase. "The Holland case."

"Going to trial in a fortnight." Catherine answered before she asked.

"Correct. And I'm here to offer you an invitation." She handed Catherine the case file to refresh her memory. "Defence has called you as a witness."

"Defence?" Catherine repeated, confused.

"Indeed. Asked for you by name at that." Erica continued, standing up. "I don't know why but make sure you're prepared; we don't want to lose this case." Catherine watched her walk to the door before calling out after her.

"Who's the defence attorney?" Erica turned slowly, throwing a curious glance over the blonde.

"James Hamley."

"Oh." Cath's heart sank. "Perfect."

X x x

"Gil?" Catherine knocked softly, poking her head into her boss' office.

"Hmm?" He asked, not looking up from his latest experiment.

"I have a problem." She began tentatively, ambling over to peer over his shoulder.

"What sort of problem?" He asked, standing up straight and casting a wary eye at her. She pursed her lips.

"I've been summoned by the defence to testify in the Holland trial."

"Okay." He nodded, not understanding the predicament.

"Well, the defence lawyer is the husband of …" she paused. Was Laura still a friend? "Of an acquaintance." She settled on at last.

"An acquaintance?" He repeated cautiously. "Does this have anything to do with Sam?"

"No." She frowned. "No, it's nothing like that. But I may have, unintentionally, offended this particular acquaintance."

"And you're worried that this lawyer is going to take it out on you in court?"

"Uh huh." She agreed, lowering herself into the chair opposite his desk. He sank into his chair facing her, tapping his fingertips together in thought.

"Look, it's a professional place. If the questioning gets out of hand, the prosecution lawyer will step in. Who do you have?"

"Erica Ross."

"Ah." He nodded, recalling the face. "Talk to her. Tell her what you told me. She'll keep an eye on proceedings."

Catherine winced. She had hoped he wouldn't say that. Erica would want to know precisely how Catherine had offended Laura, which would mean confessing her sins as it were.

X x x

By the time she returned to her office, not feeling much better for the trip, her answer machine was flashing at her. She pressed the button and fell heavily into her seat, dropping her head onto the desk.

After the machine announced that she had one new message, a hauntingly familiar voice filtered through her office.

"Hey Catherine, its Lorna." Cath's head flew up, staring at the phone in horror. "It was really good to see you again the other day. And I know that you're seeing someone, but if you want to meet for a drink or anything then … just give me a call. Anytime."

The message beeped out and the office fell silent, but Catherine continued to stare in shock at the machine, as if it could provide all the answers the needed.

X x x

She was still sulking in her office several minutes later when the phone rang again. She flicked her blue eyes up from the case file to stare at the phone. She hesitated for a moment before finally getting the guts to pick it up.

"Willows." She answered, trying to sound blasé.

"Hey Cath." That familiar smooth voice instantly calmed her shaken nerves.

"Hey." She breathed, slamming the folder closed for a few minutes.

"You sound stressed." Sara said instinctively. "What's wrong?"

"Uh, I'll tell you about it later." She groaned, sitting back in her seat. "Everything okay at home?" She asked, suddenly noticing the late hour.

"Erm, sort of." Sara answered. "Lindsey had a nightmare."

"Aw." Cath frowned. "Is she alright?"

"I think so; she's having something to drink now. I was just wondering if you had any suggestions?" Sara sounded slightly fretful at the turn of events. So far she had managed dinner, bath time and bedtime on her own flawlessly. Nightmares were new for her and she knew better than anyone not to get it wrong.

"She'll be okay. Just keep her company tonight." Cath promised, touched by Sara's concern for her young daughter.

"Okay. I can do that." Sara agreed. "Are you sure you're alright?"

"I'll be fine." Cath promised. "I'll see you later." She looked up, checking that no one was within earshot of her office. "I love you." She could practically feel Sara smile on the other end of the phone as she answered.

"I love you too."

X x x

By the time Catherine arrived home, tired and stressed having been out of the house since early afternoon the day before; she wanted nothing more than a cuddle and sleep.

She heaved her tired body upstairs, quietly nudging the bedroom door so as not to disturb her girlfriend, who she had discovered was a surprisingly light sleeper.

The sight that lay before her was enough to melt even the strongest heart. Sara was sound asleep, with Lindsey curled up contentedly in her arms. With a fond sigh, Catherine quietly changed into pyjamas and slipped under the duvet beside them. She managed to coil herself around Lindsey and nestle her hand in Sara's dark hair, splayed across the pillow.

Her movements must have disturbed Sara as chocolate brown eyes blinked open at her sleepily.

"Morning." She whispered, noting Cath's arrival.

"Morning baby." Cath whispered back, running her fingers through Sara's hair. "I see you solved the nightmare problem."

"Yeah." Sara laughed softly, inching herself into a more seated position. Catherine followed suit, leaving Lindsey cocooned tightly between them. "Yeah, I figured this was the easiest way to keep an eye on her."

"Thank you." Cath smiled sweetly. "You looked adorable." Sara blushed, casting an affectionate glance down at the snoozing child.

"What was wrong earlier?" She asked, looking back up to meet Catherine's tired gaze.

"Oh, I was having a bad day." Cath groaned, sinking against Sara's shoulder. "James Hamley is the defence attorney for Clive Holland. He's called for me to testify."

"Is that bad?" Sara frowned, not really following.

"James is Laura's husband. And considering the state of affairs between us, I can't see this going well."

"He can't bring personal issues into a courthouse." Sara scoffed. "It's unprofessional." Cath looked up at her, raising an eyebrow.

"He's a lawyer." She pointed out. "I don't know, I just think there must be some reason he's called me. There's nothing particularly relevant that I can offer his defence. I wasn't even lead CSI on the case."

She felt Sara kiss the top of her head, feeling her body slowly start to relax again after her rant.

"Anyway, what was Linds' nightmare about?"

"School." Sara mumbled, not particularly liking the change of subject. "She got in trouble today."

"What for?" Catherine asked, sitting up so she could face Sara properly.

"What do you think? Us."

"Oh no." Cath sighed. "More fighting?" Sara nodded slowly.

"This time she threw a glue stick at someone." Cath bit her lip, trying to swallow the urge to laugh. Sara noticed her struggle and smiled. "I know; I had to stop myself laughing when they hauled me in to talk to me at the end of the day."

"So, what have they said?" Catherine asked, clearing her throat and regaining her sobriety.

"That we need to deal with the issue and teach her not to use violence as a means to an end." Sara rolled her eyes, subconsciously running a hand through Lindsey's silky blonde hair. "It's not her fault." She moped sadly.

"I know." Cath sighed. "We'll talk to her."

"Yeah, I thought I'd wait until you got home before bringing it up." She said. "I took her for ice cream instead."

Catherine laughed, accidently moving too much for the little girl's liking. Sleepy blue eyes blinked up at them.

"Mommy." She mumbled, snuggling closer.

"Hey baby." Cath smiled, leaning down to kiss her cheek. "I hear you had a bad day too."

"Mm hmm." The girl nodded, still not looking up. Cath glanced at the clock. It was nearly time for her to get up and start getting ready for school. She pursed her lips in thought, casting a glance over her two girls; both looked as shattered as she was.

"Well, maybe we need a day off then." She suggested, causing Lindsey too look up with wide eyes.

"No school?" She asked suspiciously.

"No school, no housework. No homework." She promised, catching a glimpse of Sara's knowing smile out of the corner of her eye. "I think we need a sleep in and a day out. All of us."

"Yay." Lindsey whispered, snuggling back down under the blanket and closing her eyes. Sara laughed, meeting Catherine's gaze.

"I'll phone she school." She said, climbing out of the warm nest of blankets. "Would you like a fever or a stomach ache?"

"Tell them it's a 24-hour bug." Cath offered.

"If we tell them she's got measles we could have a week off." Sara pointed out with a sly wink.


	26. The Trial

_**The Trial**_

Catherine buried her hands in her lap, spinning her signet ring around her finger nervously. She was normally good at keeping her cool in court, but today she was shaking with dread.

"So, Miss Willows." James stood up, stalking in front of her like a caged panther tormenting its prey. "You attended the scene at the defendant's address on 14th September. Is that correct?"

"Yes, that's correct." She cleared her throat, suddenly feeling desperate for a glass of water. She could feel Grissom's questioning gaze on her from across the courtroom, like he knew she was nervous.

James hummed in thought for a moment, nodding slowly, before finally turning to face her.

"Where had you been before attending the scene?" Catherine blinked, taken aback by the question.

"Erm, I don't know." She answered honestly. "At home, probably."

"Ah." He nodded, sending a sly look towards his client who had been fidgeting for the whole trial so far, but now was watching intently along with the rest of the room, as if he too was curious as to the lawyer's motives. "You weren't in the Bar and Bistro on East Charleston Boulevard?" Cath narrowed her eyes, scanning her memory. She remembered going to that particular bar in September but was it that night…?

Before she could work out the dates in her mind, James continued. "You were there for over two hours. Drinking daiquiris, correct?"

"Yes." She said slowly, recalling the memory. She did go into work straight afterwards. "I had one drink, two hours before my shift started. Any alcohol would already be gone from my system."

"Uh huh." James nodded, not really listening. "Who were you with, at the bar?"

Catherine pursed her lips. So, this is where he was going with it. "A friend." She answered honestly. James smirked. He was too good for that.

"A friend." He agreed sarcastically. "And what was this 'friend's' name?"

"Objection!" Erica jumped up. Catherine breathed a sigh of relief; she was wondering when the prosecution lawyer would step in to end this nonsense. "What has this got to do with the trial?"

"Your honour, my line of questioning concerns the integrity of the CSIs and therefore of the evidence. If I may…"

The judge seemed to think about the explanation for a moment before nodding.

"I'll allow it, but get to the point." He instructed. "We don't have all day."

"Thank you. Catherine, the name of your friend please?"

Catherine paused for a second, her eyes instinctively darting to Grissom's before answering. "Sara."

"Sara." The way in which James repeated her name, turning the letters over his tongue slowly, made Catherine want to hurt him. "Are you sleeping with her?" She was expecting something of the sort, but the question threw her all the same. She saw Grissom flinch out of the corner of her eye, as if burnt by the question. Catherine swallowed hard, getting up the courage to look James in the eye.

"Yes."

"And, were you dating her at the time of the offence, on September 14th?"

"Yes I was."

"I see." He nodded. "So, that was a date then."

"It was for Sara's birthday." Cath answered quietly. "We had one drink with friends before work."

"Tell me, Catherine, how did you and Sara meet?" Here it was; the money question.

"We work together." She bit her lip, feeling her cheeks turn pink. There was a few murmurs from the court but a dark look from the judge silenced them.

"So, on the night you attended the scene, you had been drinking with a younger, female colleague who you were also dating. Is that correct?"

"Yes." She admitted quietly. James smirked at her from his place by the jury bench.

"And you both then went to the lab." He continued. "Who else were you working with at my client house that night?"

"My supervisor and Sara." She answered quietly, already predicting his next line of questioning.

"I see." He said excitedly. "Who interviewed my client at the scene?"

"I did."

"Did you think he was guilty?" Cath tried to hide a smile. Nice try.

"I don't make judgements until all the evidence has been analysed." She answered calmly. It was a rehearsed answer for a common question. James laughed dryly.

"No, no of course you don't. But what did your gut instinct tell you? Guilty?"

"I thought he was hiding something." She admitted, squirming in her seat. She knew how it would look so tried to force herself to sit still.

"Right. Things are starting to make sense now." James nodded, leaning casually against the jury bench. "You made a judgement about my client and then you and your little girlfriend made the evidence fit."

"No!" She shouted, instantly realising her mistake. Calming down, she cleared her throat. "Sara and I are professionals. Neither of us would manipulate evidence like that. And aside from that, I have no control of Sara's actions." Her attempts to sound rational sounded flat even to her own ears, not that it mattered anymore because she had already lost. James had done his job; humiliated her and undermined her integrity and her persona. But he had one last trick to play.

"Miss Willows." He asked calmly, wandering back to his client and lowering himself into his seat. "What is your professional status regarding your girlfriend?"

"I'm her assistant supervisor."

James smiled. Mission accomplished.

"No further questions, your honour."

X x x

Catherine could feel Grissom's eyes on her before she looked up. He was just stood, staring at her from outside the courtroom door.

"Don't give me that look, Gil." She begged softly.

"You didn't tell me?" It was phrased as a question; but there was no confusion in his voice, just stone cold anger.

"We weren't ready." She mumbled.

"So it is true?" He dropped onto the bench with an ungraceful grunt. She shrugged helplessly, sending him a perplexed look.

"I was under oath. Of course it's true."

"You and Sara." He repeated quietly. "How long?"

"A few months." She answered evasively, running a hand through her hair.

"How long Catherine?" He reiterated forcefully.

"Beginning of September." She answered at last. "That night was the first time I met some of her friends."

"I don't believe this." He rubbed a hand through his hair. "What the hell do you think you're playing at?" She turned to him with shock written on her face.

"What am I playing at?" She repeated. "Apart from trying to live a normal life? To fall in love?" Grissom scoffed, earning him a glare. She jumped to her feet, whirling to challenge him with fiery blue eyes.

"You have no idea what Sara and I feel for each other!" She yelled at him, earning her a few stares from the dwindling crowd in the hallway.

"Come on Catherine," Grissom retorted. "You're risking your career, the respect of your colleagues. The trial! And all for some stupid fling."

"No," She shook her head. "For love Gil. Sara and I are in love." She explained defensively.

"You're her supervisor Catherine; you're not allowed to love her!"

Cath looked like he'd just slapped her. Slowly, things started to fall into place and a soft laugh bubbled out of her.

"Is that what this is about?" She asked, shaking her head slowly as she lowered herself back onto the bench. "You're mad at me because I had the guts to go for her when you didn't."

"Catherine, what happened in there is testament…"

"No." She cut him off. "You should know better than anyone that you can't chose who you fall in love with."

"Is it really worth it?" He asked after a long silence. She wasn't sure whether he was asking for the sake of her career or because he was genuinely curious as to what he had missed. Either way, there was only one response she could think of.

"I love her." She said softly. "I can't imagine waking up without her." He looked up, a look of hurt flashing across his face.

"She lives with you?"

"Uh, yeah." Cath answered, suddenly realising that she hadn't mentioned that. "She moved in just before Christmas." Grissom scowled, analysing this new piece of information. Cath watched a maze of emotions tread a path across his face before he finally stood up and faced her.

"You're making a mistake!" He decided, turning to leave.

"Gil?" She called after him pitifully, but he didn't turn around. He walked away and left her sitting alone.

As she dropped her head into her hands, she felt someone sit down beside her. Throwing them a sideways glance, her heart sank.

"Go away." She muttered, not moving from her desolate position.

Sofia didn't move. She sat beside the CSI silently for five whole minutes before speaking.

"If you really love her then don't listen to him." She said at last. Catherine looked up, surprise written across her features. Sofia sent her a sympathetic smile.

"Thank you." Catherine managed to whisper at last.

"You're just lucky Ecklie didn't hear any of that." Sofia pointed out with a wry smile. Catherine looked up at her with wide, startled eyes.

"Do you think Grissom will tell him?"

"No." Sofia assured her, softening her voice. "He was just caught off guard, that's all. He's lashing out."

"Yeah." Cath agreed uncertainly. "Not that it matters anyway." She sighed. "My careers probably shot to hell now."

Sofia fell quiet for a moment, studying the strawberry-blonde.

"Is she worth it?" She asked at last. Cath frowned at her, not understanding. "Suppose you do lose your job. Your friends. Would it still be worth it if you get Sara?"

Catherine thought about this for a moment.

"Yes." She whispered at last. Sofia smiled.

"Then it doesn't matter." She stood up, placing a warm hand on her shoulder. "Go home. Be with Sara. Everything will work out."

Catherine watched Sofia walk away, a thought striking her. The detective was right: Sara was the only friend she needed.

And there was one friend who she certainly didn't need … and she was going to pay for what she had just done.


	27. In and Out

_**In and Out**_

Catherine ducked her head as she entered the lab. Despite Judy's welcoming smile and the abundance of busy techs, she couldn't help but feel like everyone was whispering about her as she shuffled down the corridor.

She rapped on Grissom's office door, poking her head inside at the grunt she received in response.

"Hey," she said softly. "Have you got a minute?"

"Certainly." He dropped his pen and folded his arms across his chest defensively as she crept inside, ensuring to close the door behind her. She didn't quite know where to put herself for this conversation and ended up perched nervously on the edge of his desk.

"I wanted to talk about, well…you can guess."

"You and Sara." He stated bluntly.

"Yeah." She nodded slowly, biting her lip. "What are you going to do about it?"

"I don't know yet." He admitted. "I guess we'll just have to figure something out." He sighed, running a hand through his hair. He opened his mouth as if to continue but closed it without saying a word. When he picked up his pen and continued writing Catherine assumed the conversation was over; she frowned at his inability to hold a proper conversation, but rather than risk angering him further she just stood up and made her way glumly across the office. As she reached the door, he finally voiced the thought in his head, though never glancing up from his work.

"How did he know all that anyway?" She had to think for a moment before she realised that he was talking about the lawyer.

"He's married to one of my friends." She explained. "Well, ex-friends." The supervisor sent her an odd look, finally putting his pen back down. Catherine sighed, sitting down in front of the desk. "Laura is not the most open minded of people. When I introduced her to Sara she … well, she didn't exactly greet the news with open arms."

"So you're friends aren't happy with this?" He asked, suddenly quite intrigued.

"No." Cath laughed dryly.

"Hmm." He nodded. "What about Sara's friends?" Catherine shrugged; it wasn't something she'd ever given thought to.

"They're fine with it. But then they've had more time to deal with their friend being gay."

"And, uh, what about your family?" Gil asked, sliding out of his chair to sit on the corner of the desk where Cath had previously been perched. She exhaled, feeling herself relax a little as the conversation turned to questions she could answer.

"Well, they think it's a mistake. A mid-life crisis or something." She shook her head, offering a small smile and a shrug. "You know what my mother's like. Everything's a drama."

"So, your friends and family all think you're making a big mistake." He repeated, fixing her with a curious look. "What makes you so sure you're not?" Catherine's face fell as she realised that she'd backed herself into a corner. Her eyes narrowed, a black look crossing her face.

"You sneaky… look, Sara and I are happy. And I don't care what anyone else thinks because I love her." She stood up, stalking across the office and swung the door open, pausing only long enough to throw a dirty look back at him over her shoulder. "Let me know when you decide what you're going to do."

X x x

"Hey boss!" Nick called, snapping Grissom back to the conversation.

"Sorry?" He asked, shaking his head. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Catherine staring at him.

"I said I think you've made a mistake." Nick repeated tentatively, unnerved by his supervisor's unpredictable mood this shift. He either expected him to fly off the handle at the accusation or demand an in-depth explanation.

Instead, his response was quite calm.

"Yes, I think I have." He agreed softly, throwing a frown at Catherine before leaving. Nick exchanged a look with the blonde.

"What's with him?" He asked, baffled.

"Oh, ignore him. He's in a mood with me." She explained, following the boss out.

X x x

"Hey!" She hollered, stalking him into the layout room where Warrick and Sara both looked up in surprise at the intrusion. "What's your problem?" She demanded before she realised that they were not alone.

"I'm not the one with the problem, Catherine." He answered calmly, picking up a results sheet and pretending to take it in.

"What's going on?" Sara asked, sending Catherine a concerned glance.

"Oh don't worry; I'm sure she'll tell you later." Gil said, throwing Sara a glare. The brunette blinked, taken aback. Cath rolled her eyes, trying to reassure Sara silently that she was okay. Sara narrowed her eyes at her lover, not buying it.

"What do we know?" Cath directed the question at Warrick, but her gaze was latched firmly onto the back of Grissom's head, glowering at him sullenly.

Warrick fidgeted uncomfortably, sharing an awkward glance with Sara.

"Well…"

X x x

Later, as they were taking a well earned break while going over some case notes, tensions had not eased and the boys were feeling more and more uncomfortable in the presence of their supervisors.

They could tell that Sara too was feeling it, although her response was simply to sulk quietly.

"Hey," Greg bounced in, cutting the atmosphere slightly with his wide grin. "Not wanting to be modest but I may have broken your case. Again." He beamed, proudly handing over his results. Catherine took it, scanning the paper quickly.

"It was female DNA on the bed sheets." She quirked her eyebrow.

"That's something you'd understand." Grissom muttered, earning him a few raised eyebrows of his own and a scowl from Catherine.

"That means Johnny is off the hook." She continued, ignoring him. "And we need to find the woman in our victim's bed."

"Her boss did say something about a female friend stopping by the office the day before she died." Warrick chipped in.

"Well get me her DNA and I'll give you the answer you seek." Greg grinned, skipping over to where Sara was pouring herself a cup of coffee. He held out his mug with a cute smile, frowning in confusion when she ignored him.

"I'll get Brass to get a warrant for the office CCTV, see if we can get an ID on her." Gil continued, taking the results from Catherine to read himself. "I'm sure you can take care of that Cath; perhaps she's a friend of yours." The calmness with which he said it made her blood boil. But before she could respond, there was a clatter in the sink. Everyone looked over in time to see Sara abandon her freshly made cup of coffee, now swirling down the sink from the dropped cup.

"Sara?" Greg questioned, reaching out to her. But despite their baffled calls, she practically ran from the room, disappearing in the direction of the main doors.

"What the hell?" Nick asked, scratching his head. Catherine was still staring at the door in dismay. Narrowing her eyes, she cast a sideways glance in Grissom's direction; he appeared just as baffled at the boys.

"What was that about?" Warrick asked, a frown creasing his normally laid-back expression. Catherine sighed, pushing herself away from the bench.

"We're seeing each other."

There was a moment of silence where the only movement was Grissom's head, whipping around to face her.

"What?" Warrick emitted a confused laugh. She looked up, staring him straight in the eye.

"Sara and I are dating." She clarified evenly. The boys fell silent, staring at her with wide, perplexed eyes.

"Oh my God." Greg squeaked at last, unable to hold it in any longer. Catherine, ignoring the excited lab rat, whirled on a shocked Grissom. "There, are you happy now?"

"Catherine…" He began tentatively.

"No, I've had it. Can't you see what your little jibes are doing to her?" She pointed in the direction Sara had vanished. "If you're angry with me Gil, take it out on me; but don't make her listen to that too! So, now they know. Are we done here?" She asked, already heading towards the door.

"Cath…" Nick's hesitant voice halted her in the threshold. "Are you and her really…"

"I love her Nick." The blonde shrugged helplessly, throwing a dirty look in Grissom's direction. "Even if some people can't understand that."

As she disappeared in search of her girlfriend, the boys were left staring at Grissom in astonishment. He pursed his lips, feeling himself getting hot under their stares.

"Get back to work guys." He mumbled at last, shuffling out and leaving them sat there, agape.

X x x

"Sara!" Catherine hollered across the parking lot. Through the rain she could see her girlfriend come to a stop a few feet ahead and ran to catch up. Though the brunette had only been outside for a minute or two, her clothes were already drenched and her hair clung to her pale face. And despite the rain, Catherine could tell she was crying. "Honey…"

"He hate's us." Sara mumbled sadly. Catherine shook her head, unable to form words to the contrary.

"It's going to be alright, baby." It was the best she could offer right now. "Come back inside." She reached out and slipped her hand into Sara's.

X x x

Exiting his car, Brass had made a run – well, a jog – for the lab; only to find himself transfixed by the bizarre sight of Catherine and Sara stood in the middle of the parking lot, holding hands, in the rain.

He paused at the top of the steps, watching them for a moment.

As the thunder rolled ahead he was about to shout out to them, when Catherine leant in and kissed Sara's lips.

X x x

"Jesus." Nick whistled. "I don't even know what to say." Despite Grissom's orders, they hadn't 'gotten back to work' quite yet.

"I wonder why he has such a problem with it." Greg scowled. "I mean, I know he has a thing for Sara but that can't be all it is… can it?"

"I don't know." Nick groaned. "I guess Cath and Sara are the only ones who can answer that."

"I'm not so sure Sara herself knew what was going on." Warrick countered. "Cath was yelling at Grissom earlier and Sara looked pretty confused then."

"So, I'm not going crazy then." Brass interrupted, materialising in the doorway. The boys frowned at him, not following. "I just saw the girls locking lips in the rain." He jerked his thumb in the direction of the parking lot.

"And I missed it!" Greg squealed, bulleting into the hall.

"Man, I can't get my head around this." Nick said, tousling his hair. Warrick dropped down beside him on the couch.

"I think it's good news." He offered. "I mean, more power to them."

"Yeah." Brass agreed, albeit with a frown. "Then why all the long faces?"

Before anyone could explain to the detective about the tension between Grissom and Catherine, the two women wandered past the break room, hand in hand and dripping wet.

Neither looked up, although both could feel the eyes on them as they made their way down the glass corridor.

X x x

"I hate this." Sara murmured sadly. Catherine, perched on the edge of her desk, used a towel to dry them both off. She placed a hand on the back of Sara's neck, massaging her tight muscles gently.

"I know sweetie." She whispered, releasing a soft sigh. Their tender moment was interrupted by a gentle knock and Warrick's head appeared around the side of the door.

"Hey, is it safe to enter?" He asked, creeping inside. Catherine relaxed, glad to see the dark-skinned man.

"Yeah, hey Warrick." She greeted. He closed the door behind him, taking a moment to observe the two women.

Sara was sat on the chair with her back to him; Catherine was on the edge of the desk helping her to dry off. He sauntered over, placing a hand on Sara's shoulder briefly and dropped onto the couch.

"So," he began. "You two caused quite a stir."

"How are they taking it?" Cath asked, biting her lip. Warrick shrugged.

"Nick and Brass are still recovering. Greg's high as a kite." Sara laughed softly, nodding in understanding.

"Tell him no he can't watch." She joked, causing Cath to smack her arm lightly and Warrick to chuckle.

"So, how did this –" he gestured between them "– happen?" The two women shared a look.

"It just sort of did." Sara explained weakly. Cath was running a hand through the brunette's damp hair affectionately, too deep in thought to respond.

"Where's Grissom?" She asked, changing the subject.

"Hiding in his office." Rick answered. Cath laughed dryly.

"Good. I hope he stays there." There was a moment of silence between the three before the man spoke up again.

"So, what happens now?"

Cath took a deep breath, meeting Sara's gaze.

"I guess we talk to Ecklie before anyone else does."

"Yay." The brunette muttered glumly. Warrick laughed softly.

"Tell him Grissom's against it; it might sway him to your side." He joked, admiring the way in which the two women responded to each other's little touches.

A part of him had to wonder how he had missed this, but now was not the time.

**x x x x**

**Let me know what you think so far x**


	28. Management

_**Management**_

"Hey," Wendy jumped at the voice hissing in her ear. She turned, not really surprised to find David Hodges lurking over her shoulder. "Have you heard?"

"Heard what?" She asked, disinterested.

"Catherine and Sara…" he brought his hands together theatrically. "They're an item."

"What?" The DNA tech spun in her seat to face him with a sceptical look.

"Seriously?" Mandy Webster spoke up from the doorway, startling them both. "I just heard Archie and Bobby talking about that. I didn't think it was true."

"It's true." Hodges nodded. "Apparently Cath outed them and then bitched out Grissom."

"For what?" The women asked, sharing a puzzled look. Hodges frowned in thought.

"I don't know, I haven't got the full story yet." He shook his head. "But it sounds like they've been a thing for quite a while."

"You're actually serious?" Wendy questioned. "Catherine and Sara are dating?"

"Yep. Hot or what?"

"What?" They all jumped in unison, turning to find a shocked Ecklie skulking in the doorway.

There was a moment of silence at the lab rats faced off with the boss, coming to the realisation that they'd just outed their colleagues to the man who could fire them.

"Uh, I think that's my phone." Mandy said at last, scampering past the livid man. He ignored the fingerprint tech, continuing to glare at David.

"Where did you hear that?" He demanded.

"Erm, it's all over the lab. Sir." He explained hurriedly, slinking backwards until he bumped into Wendy. Ecklie pursed his lips.

"Is that a fact?" He snapped, turning and stalking down the hallway. When he was out of sight, Wendy smacked Hodges' arm.

"Nice going, mouth piece!"

X x x

Catherine dropped Sara's hand out of instinct as they exited the office, although it did cross her mind that it was probably an obsolete act now. The grapevine moved fast around here.

"I feel like I'm on display." Sara mumbled, casting paranoid glances around them.

"I know hon." Cath agreed quietly. "But the sooner we get it sorted the sooner people will stop gossiping."

"What are you going to say to him?" Warrick asked, leaving behind them.

"There's only really one way to tell him." Cath shrugged. "I guess we'll just have to pray he's in a good mood."

"Willows. Sidle. My office, now!" A voice bellowed from behind. They both jumped, matching startled looks on their paling faces.

"We were just coming to find you." Catherine squeaked, hoping it might win a few brownie points if he knew they had intended to tell him. It didn't.

"Maybe you should pray for something else." Warrick muttered to Sara.

"Get lost Brown." He barked at the man, stalking through them all towards his office. The group shared a look of dismay and the girls slowly turned to follow him, like reprimanded children.

X x x

"Alright." He began calmly as the two women filed in sheepishly behind him. He sat down, waiting for them to follow suit before speaking again. "So, am I to assume by your faces that the rumours are true?"

They both nodded, casting nervous glances at each other. Sara dropped her hand between their chairs and Catherine instantly reached down to grab it.

"Would one of you like to explain this?" He asked of his silent subordinates. Cath cleared her throat.

"Well, Sara and I are dating."

"Yes, I gathered that much." Ecklie rolled his eyes sarcastically. "For how long?"

"About five months." Sara answered. "It was a Thursday." Ecklie took a deep, calming breath. Now was his chance to prove his professionalism. While firing them.

"I suppose Grissom knew about this." He said, making a note of this event in his notebook.

"Actually, he only found out yesterday." Catherine answered quietly. Ecklie fixed her with a surprised look.

"Really?" He nodded. "So, is he alright with this?"

"Not really." The women fidgeted awkwardly. "He's kind of pissed right now."

"Huh." The boss nodded curiously. Perhaps there was another way to handle this situation, he mused. He stood up and walked around his desk, leaning against it in front of them. "I suppose you two want to be kept on the same team?"

Sara and Catherine looked up in unison, surprise and hope written on their faces.

"Can we?"

His lips spread into a smirk. "I'm sure we can work something out."

X x x

"Oh, so you are here." Ecklie pointed out, wandering into Grissom's office. "You ignored my call."

"That's true." He agreed, not looking up. Ecklie rolled his eyes and wandered over, dropping a file onto his desk. Grissom blinked at the intrusion. "What's this?" He asked, eyeing Ecklie suspiciously.

"It's the report about Catherine and Sara. I want you to sign it."

"Report?" Grissom repeated. "How do you know about them?"

"They told me." He lied. "And as of tonight Catherine is no longer in any position of supervision over Sara. They will continue to work together as colleagues only."

"They're both still on grave?" Gil clarified, puzzled.

"Providing they follow the rules set out in that." Ecklie nodded towards the folder. "Now just sign it and all of this will be sorted." Grissom picked up a pen and turned to the last page, his hand hovering over it for a moment before putting the pen back down.

"Conrad, I know you don't approve of this. Why are you backing them up?" He asked. Ecklie smirked.

"Listen Gil, I may have had my issues with Catherine and Sara but the fact is they work well together. And I can't afford to lose them."

"They threatened to quit?" Grissom asked, bug-eyed. Ecklie didn't answer; he simply nudged the report closer to Gil. The CSI snatched up his pen and signed it hurriedly, handing it back.

"Thank you." Ecklie nodded, snatching the paper and sailing to the door. He drifted out with a dramatic flick of the wrist. "As you were."

X x x

Cath could feel people watching her but right now she didn't care. For in her hand was a photocopy of a piece of paper she never thought she would need.

As of ten minutes ago, she could continue to date Sara and work with her, without fear of repercussion.

When her beeper went off she stopped outside the trace lab to check it. Glancing up, she caught a glimpse of Henry and Hodges staring at her.

"What?" She barked, making them jump. Henry, unable to form words, shook his head furiously. Hodges stepped back.

"Nothing boss." He mumbled. "You're hair looks nice today."

She rolled her eyes and continued down the hall.

Alright, so not completely free from repercussions.


	29. Love and Other Drugs

**Thanks**** for the reviews so far guys, you all rock!  
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**x x x x**_**  
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_**Love and Other Drugs**_

"Thank you." Cath mumbled sleepily, accepting the bag. Sara had gone to Nancy's to collect Lindsey, so Catherine had stopped off for some breakfast-to-go. She envisioned a lazy Saturday morning in bed with her girls and enough bagels to sink a small boat.

As she turned to leave, a contented smile on her face, she was met with a pair of cold blue eyes. There was a moment of awkward silence as they faced off.

"Laura." She greeted coolly at last, walking around her towards the door. Tempting as it was, she was too tired to fight today. Laura, however, was not about to let her off that easily.

"I hear James gave you quite a battle in court." She smarmed, following her with her eyes. Catherine stopped, turning around to face her.

"He overstepped a line." The CSI pointed out. "My private life had nothing to do with that case; he had no right to bring it up in court."

"Well, the jury seemed to disagree." Laura smirked. When Catherine didn't flinch, she softened her voice. "Look, Cathy we only did this to show you what kind of mistake you're making."

"We? Oh, so you put him up to this." She rolled her eyes tiredly. "I should have known."

"I was looking out for you."

"Yeah? Well thank you." Cath snapped sarcastically. "But your little plan backfired because our boss sided with us." She saw a twinge of shame flash across Laura's face but it was gone as quickly as it appeared, and in its place a smug grin was spreading across her collagen-filled lips.

"Well, either way you lost the case." Her last-ditch attempt to rile Catherine worked, but not for the reason she was expecting.

"You're actually proud of that? You're husband released a murderer." Laura's face fell, but she continued regardless. "I hope you're happy – thanks to you that bastard is free to walk the streets! And next time he kills someone, it'll be thanks to you and you're slimy husband!"

"It's not my fault that you were sleeping with your understudy." They both suddenly became very aware that other patrons in the sleepy coffee shop were starting to stare. Catherine bit back a gasp at her words.

"I would never compromise a case. And neither would Sara." She retorted. When Laura's smirk didn't fade, Catherine threw up her hands. "Why am I even explaining this to you: you won't get it." She turned to walk away, but stopped in the threshold long enough to cast a dark glance back at the woman. Laura hadn't moved; she remained planted in the middle of the small shop, glowering at Catherine's back. "I don't care enough about you to hate you." The CSI spat. "But I never want to see you again."

X x x

Grissom skulked down the deserted corridor with his head ducked, just in case he ran into anyone. He was sick of the stares and had decided to take refuge for a while in his old friend's office.

"Hey Doc." He greeted, sliding into the morgue.

"Gil." Judging by the curt response, the grapevine had beaten him down here. He sighed, deciding to give in and just take the hit.

"Alright. I know you have an opinion too: lets here it." He waited patiently for the coroner to put his clipboard down and face him.

"I don't have an opinion." He countered. "What Catherine and Sara get up to outside work is their business and as long as they're both happy, I'm happy."

Grissom blinked at him in surprise. "Oh." He frowned. He had not been expecting that.

"But that's just it, isn't it." The older man continued. "They are happy. And you can't figure that out."

"It's not that." Grissom shrugged uncomfortably. "I just think they're making a mistake. This all seems too sudden."

"Sure, it seems sudden to us because we're only just finding out about it." Doc agreed. "But how long have they been together?" He paused, waiting to see if Gil had understood where he was going with this. When it was clear he hadn't, Al continued. "Look Gil, I don't know what's going on between them and you but what I can tell you is this: I have known Catherine for a long time and I can honestly say I have never seen her as happy as she has been in recent weeks."

"I guess." Gil conceded reluctantly.

"Talk to them." Doc advised. "Find out the full story and then see for yourself what they're lives are really like. Maybe, just maybe, they genuinely make each other happy."

X x x

He had taken Doc Robbins' words on, but had not yet decided what he was going to do about it. He decided that he needed some fresh air; a walk. He would go home and take Hank out for a long, quiet walk and think things over.

He had had enough of other people for one day, so opted for sneaking out rather than saying goodbye to the remaining members of his team.

He had almost managed it too, when Brass wandered through the front doors. Grissom cursed under his breath, offering a tight smile to the detective.

"I suppose you have a pearl of wisdom to share as well?"

Brass raised an eyebrow at him.

"No." He shrugged. "Although it hadn't escaped my notice that Sara has been on a more even keel of late."

Grissom nodded. He's expected as much from Brass; always looking out for the young brunette.

"You think I'm wrong for being dubious." He guessed. Brass chuckled dryly.

"Gil, whatever your problem with them is, it's not worth losing their friendship. Just talk to them." Grissom sighed.

"That seems to be the tune of the night."

X x x

Catherine switched off the vacuum cleaner, listening for a moment. She was about to shrug it off and go back to hoovering when the doorbell went again.

Opening the door, she blinked in surprise at her unexpected visitor.

"Hi." She greeted. "What are you doing here?" Grissom fidgeted nervously on the doorstep.

"I wanted to talk."

"Okay." She nodded, stepping aside to let him in.

He glanced around awkwardly as he made his way into the lounge.

"Sara's not here?" He asked, noting the absence of the brunette.

"No, she's taken Lindsey to the park." Cath answered, moving around him into the kitchen to pour him some coffee. "They were getting under my feet." She joked upon her return, handing him the freshly poured mug.

"Huh." He nodded, accepting the drink. They both sat down, sharing an uncomfortable moment of silence. After a while he cleared his throat and began talking. "So, you two…"

"We're happy." She cut him off.

"I can see that." He agreed softly. "I just can't understand how this happened."

"Well, I started confiding in her about certain things." Cath answered evasively. "And we got close. We started spending time together."

"So, you naturally started dating?" He clarified in bemusement.

"Well, yeah." She shrugged. "I don't know, it just happened."

"And you have never … before?" He seemed almost embarrassed to ask the question that had been bugging him. Cath laughed dryly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Look, Sara and I have both had our fair share of complicated relationships. We both want to same thing."

"And what is that?" He pressed, leaning forward in his seat in anticipation. Cath shrugged, mulling the question over.

"Security. Faithfulness. The knowledge that there's always someone to come home to." She listed. "I don't know Gil, I want comfort. You know? I want to not have to make small talk or pretend to be interested in each other's day. Sara and I don't need to fill silence with mindless conversation; we can just be together and enjoy each other's company."

"So, you two don't talk to each other?" Grissom frowned in confusion. She laughed, shaking her head.

"No, of course we do. I just meant that sometimes it's nice to not feel like we have to talk." She clarified. "Sara knows when I'm upset. Or when I'm tired. I don't need to ask her or tell her anything. She just knows."

"Okay." Grissom said, starting to understand what the blonde was saying.

"It's like; the other day I came home from work, I was tired and stressed and I just needed a break. Without me saying a word Sara had run me a bath and got Lindsey ready for school." Gil listened intently to her story, intrigued by the sudden vulnerability her voice had taken on. "Do you know, in eight years of marriage to Ed, he never once did anything like that for me? He was my husband Gil, and all he could offer me was a drug habit and bruises." She shook her head, saddened by how that made her feel. "Sara treats me better than I thought possible. She treats me and Lindsey like we're the only people on the planet that matter."

There were a few minutes of silence while Grissom absorbed this information. He had known Catherine a long time but he had never seen her speak so candidly about her marriage or her feelings before.

"And what about Sara?" He asked at last. "What is it that you give her?"

Catherine took a deep breath, exhaling slowly as she thought about the question.

"I guess there's only one thing Sara's ever wanted from life." She looked up, meeting his curious gaze. "Love."

**x x x x**

**:)**


	30. Young Guns II

_**Young Guns II**_

Grissom surveyed the scene, furrowing his brow in concentration.

It was a big case, three dead and no apparent motive against the family. As such the whole team had been called in. Thankfully, it was the only pressing crime that night.

Nick had already made his way inside, hugging the walls as he went. Catherine and Warrick were discussing the known facts of the case with Brass on the lawn.

Sara picked up her kit and wandered into Grissom's line of sight, breaking his concentration.

"I'm going to check around the back." She informed him, already setting off down the side of the house. Catherine looked up at the sound of her voice.

"Hey, Cavalier," she called out to a nearby officer. "Go with her." He nodded silently and followed the brunette, one hand poised on his weapon.

"You keeping tabs on her?" Warrick joked dryly. Cath laughed, although in a way she was.

"Hey guys," Grissom interrupted loudly. "You two take the ground floor; Nick and I will be upstairs."

"And I will be knocking on doors." Brass added, sauntering off towards the shocked neighbours.

They nodded and watched their supervisor disappear into the house before gathering their own kits and getting to work themselves.

"So, things are going okay between you two?" Warrick asked a few minutes in, breaking the silence that had fallen between them. Cath glanced over her shoulder at him.

"Yeah." She smiled to herself softly. "Yeah, everything's great." Warrick nodded, genuinely pleased to hear it.

"Good. I'm glad to hear it." He stood up and patted her on the shoulder lightly. "You two deserve some happiness."

"Thanks Rick." She shrugged modestly. "I love her."

However, he didn't hear those three simple words. A lone, loud shot rang out, sending the whole house into a stunned silence for a moment. As Warrick and Catherine's startled eyes met across the room, this time they both heard what she said.

"Sara."

X x x

The brunette jumped, pinning herself against the wall as the officer's body fell limply to her feet. She looked up, her dark scared eyes locking onto the face of the shooter. Working autonomously, her hand flew to her weapon and took aim. Her hand shook as her finger found the trigger …

X x x

Before anyone could register what was happening, a second and third shot rang out, smashing the window and sending glass shards scattering. Catherine remained rooted to the spot, staring at the now shattered window looking onto the back yard. She caught a brief glimpse of Sara hitting the ground outside it before she found herself rugby tackled to the floor.

"Get down." Warrick hissed. Above them, Grissom and Nick could be heard running to the stairs after hearing the commotion. Shots were still being fired outside, although who was shooting at who was impossible to tell.

Catherine didn't wait for the noise to stop: wriggling free from Warrick's grip, she bulleted towards the back door without a second thought.

"Catherine!" The dark-skinned man yelled as his two colleagues landed at the bottom of the stairs, weapons cocked.

X x x

The noise fell silent as Cath burst into the back yard. She stopped in the threshold, greeted by a scene of bloodshed.

Her panicked gaze scanned the yard, taking in the dead bodies, and finally settling on her girl…

X x x

By the time the boys scrambled outside the gunfire had fallen silent. They almost didn't want to look in case they didn't like what they saw.

Sara was by the house wall, a startled look frozen on her face and her weapon still in her hand. Catherine was hanging off her, arms wrapped tightly around her neck as she clung on for dear life.

Slowly, Sara lifted one arm to wrap around her back.

Nick walked over, sidestepping carefully around the fallen police officer, and took Sara's weapon from her hand so she could return Catherine's embrace properly.

The touching moment was broken by the harsh voice of Jim Brass.

"What the hell were you playing at?" He barked, causing to two to pull apart. "You could have been killed."

Catherine looked down, ashamed.

"I panicked." She offered weakly. The detective sighed, running a hand over his face.

"Don't ever do that again." He snapped, visually examining the girls for any sign of injury. "Jesus, don't scare me like that."

Cath didn't answer. She just leant against Sara's body, feeling a pair of warm arms slide around her stomach protectively.

"Are you alright?" Grissom asked Sara, stepping closer. Warrick was checking the presumably dead suspect for any signs of life.

"I'm okay." She nodded shakily. "He just took us by surprise. He was in the shed."

"In the shed?" Warrick repeated. "Who the hell cleared the scene?"

"I'll deal with it." Brass said darkly, stalking off to round up his uniforms. On his way past, he pointed a finger at Catherine. "You were lucky."

X x x

Sara released a heavy sigh as she slipped off her blood-splattered shirt. She could feel Catherine's eyes on her back, watching as she undressed. She had never felt comfortable enough in her own skin to be so revealed to others, but Catherine had been relentless in improving her insecurity to the point where she felt safe enough around the blonde to strip.

Even at work.

When she had said she was going to change and Catherine had instantly followed, the boys had wisely decided not to comment and to stay far away. So it was just the two of them in the locker room, and the heavy silence was starting to suffocate them.

"You okay?" Catherine asked at last, more the break the atmosphere than anything.

"I should be asking you that." Sara replied coolly, keeping her back to the blonde. Cath frowned, surprised by her cold response.

"What's wrong?" she asked softly, pushing herself off the bench to lean against the lockers beside Sara. The brunette took a deep breath before turning to face her, her now clean white shirt hanging open.

"What's wrong?" She repeated. "You nearly got yourself killed tonight." Cath bit her lip, averting her gaze to the floor.

"I was scared for you." She mumbled, casting a nervous glance back up. Sara sighed, running a hand through her hair.

"I know you were." She said. "But I was armed. You didn't even have your weapon out."

"I didn't think." She confessed, reaching out to toy with the bottom of Sara's shirt nervously.

"No." Sara agreed calmly. She placed her hands on Catherine's arms, getting her full attention. "Look, I know you were acting on instinct, but what would Lindsey do if she had lost both of us tonight?"

Cath looked away guiltily. That thought hadn't even crossed her mind at the time.

"Exactly." Sara mumbled, taking her silence as admission that she was right. "Just promise me that you will never risk your life like that again; not for me."

"But I love you." She whispered, staring into deep brown eyes.

"I love you too. Which is why I need to hear you say this." Sara pleaded softly. Catherine took a deep breath, daring herself to meet Sara's eager expression.

"Alright." She conceded. "I promise." She reached out and began fastening the buttons on Sara's shirt slowly, letting her fingertips glance her skin as she did so. Her perfect, unharmed skin.

Their tender moment was cut short, yet again, as Nick poked his head into the room.

"Hey girls, sorry to interrupt." He mumbled, averting his eyes slightly. "Sara, Sofia's ready to take your statement."

"Okay." She nodded, carefully extracting Catherine's hands from her clothes.

Cath watched her follow the Texan out with a heavy heart.

She knew Sara was right. And Brass. And everyone else who was thinking the same thing; she had made a stupid mistake and it could have cost her a lot more than her dignity. She have cost both her and Sara their lives.

But that aside, could she honestly say she wouldn't do it again?

**x x x x**

**Not much more to go now. Let me know what you think x**


	31. Aftermath

_**Aftermath**_

Sara released a heavy sigh as she walked into the house, dropping her keys autonomously into the wooden bowl by the door.

Catherine trailed in after, closing the door softly behind them. The journey home had been quiet to say the least; Cath couldn't quite tell whether Sara was upset with her or just shaken from the incident.

It was still early and Lindsey would be fast asleep upstairs, along with Lily, so they tried to be quiet as they came in.

The brunette had already made her way to the kitchen and was pouring herself a stiff drink when Cath slinked in behind her and slid into a seat at the counter. She didn't like Sara drinking to calm herself, but after today's events she was willing to let it slide this time.

"Hey." She called softly as last. "I'm sorry." Sara cast a brief glance over her shoulder in acknowledgement but didn't respond. "I'm sorry I scared you." Cath continued when she didn't answer. "But I'm not sorry I look out for you."

Sara turned, fixing her with an unreadable gaze.

"I know you're not used to people taking care of you, but I love you and I'm always going to run to you if I think you need me."

"I get that, I do." Sara spoke at last. She handed her girlfriend a glass and took a sip out of her own. "But I do need you. I need you to stay alive."

"I know." Cath dropped her head in shame. "I'm sorry."

The silence that followed felt like an age. She could practically hear Sara's thoughts from across the room. Eventually, Sara reached across the counter, interlocking their hands together. Cath looked up in surprise, only to be met with a gentle smile.

"Bed?" The brunette suggested softly. Cath's lips spread into a smirk; a silent answer.

"That depends, what did you have in mind?" She asked cheekily.

X x x

Nick, resisting the urge to give up and go home today, pushed his way into the morgue.

"Morning Doc." He greeted tiredly.

"Nick." The coroner responded. "I'm surprised you're still here."

"I want to solve this damn case." He rubbed a hand over his face. "I won't sleep until I get some answers."

"Well, I may have some for you. Henry put a rush on tox." The coroner said, moving around the table to his desk, where he picked up one of several scattered files. With his glasses balanced on the tip of his nose, he scanned the first page. "Your shooter had enough ketamine in his system to bring down a herd of Zebras."

Nick thought about this information for a moment. "Well, that might explain why he ended up in the shed instead of doing a runner." He mused. "And why he was stupid enough to shoot at two armed officers. Thanks Doc."

"How are the girls?" Robbins asked before the Texan could leave.

"Oh they're fine. Sara was a bit shaken up, understandably, but Cath's taken her home."

"And Catherine?" Nick released a choked laugh, shaking his head slowly.

"Well, she gave us all a fright. But she's okay. I don't think she'll be doing that again in a hurry though."

"Good." The older man nodded, breathing a sigh of relief. "I don't want to see either of those two on my table."

"Yeah, you and me both." Nick agreed. "Thanks for the answers, Doc."

X x x

Catherine stirred, vaguely aware of a noise in her hazy sleep-addled state. As she became more awake, she recognised the noise. It sounded like an injured animal, whimpering.

It meant Sara was having a nightmare.

Catherine bolted upright, fumbling in the darkness for her girlfriend's trembling body beside her.

As she attempted to wake her up, gently shaking her, it dawned on her how long it had been since this had happened.

Apparently today's incident had had a bigger impact on Sara then she had realised.

"Shush honey, it's okay." She whispered, running a hand through her silky brown hair tenderly. She felt the woman starting to stir and retracted her hand, knowing from experience that it was better to let her wake up and adjust to her surroundings before touching her.

Sara sat up slowly, letting her gaze wander the room before finally settling on Catherine.

"Hey, you alright?" The blonde asked softly.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine." She mumbled. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay baby." Cath promised, linking their hands together in the blankets.

"I just can't stop it going through my mind." Sara whispered tearfully. Cath squeezed her hand silently. This was a routine they had danced many times in the past. Which has how Catherine knew that in about two minutes, Sara would tell her what was wrong.

X x x

"I heard Officer Cavalier yell at someone and when I turned around I saw him … get shot." She swallowed back tears. "He landed right in front of me. And that guy … he was coming towards me. He fired again and I hit the floor. I started firing back but he was running so I couldn't get a clear shot." Catherine reached out to wipe away a stray tear; she'd bet the brunette didn't even know she was crying. "I kept firing. And then I heard you. And then it all stopped. Except it didn't." She wiped at her eyes futilely. "In my dream, it didn't."

Catherine wrapped her arms tightly around Sara's fragile body, holding her so close it felt like they were merging into one. She finally understood why Sara had been so upset. Finally, she saw what Sara had seen when she ran out of the house. She had seen bullets flying and her in the middle of it all.

"I'm sorry." She choked out. Sara nestled against her, tucking her head into the crook of Catherine's neck. Cath swallowed hard, running a hand slowly up and down her bare arm. "When that first shot went off, I just froze. All I could think about was that you were out there." She started softly. "I panicked. And then, then we heard more shots and I saw you duck under the window. I just wanted to protect you."

Sara nodded to show that she was still listening. She felt Catherine drop a kiss onto the top of her head and a brief smile twitched at her lips.

"I promise I will never do anything that stupid again." The blonde continued. Sara was silent for a moment, possibly judging the sincerity of Catherine's words. When she did speak, her voice was tired and husky, but with a spark of underlying humour.

"You should probably apologise to Brass too; you nearly gave him a heart attack."


	32. Vacation

_**Vacation**_

Catherine yawned, half-heartedly pouring herself a strong cup of coffee.

"Sara keeping you up?" A cheeky voice piped up behind her.

"Yes!" She snapped, finally turning around to find Nick and Warrick blinking at her, surprised by her abrupt answer. She sighed, running a hand through her hair. "No, she's just not been sleeping very well since the shooting."

"She alright?" Warrick asked, concern lacing his deep voice.

"Yeah, she's just not sleeping. So, naturally, I'm not sleeping." Cath explained, slinking over to the counter and dropping heavily onto a stool.

"Have you talked to her about it?" Nick asked, sliding onto the seat next to her.

"No, it's not her fault. I'm the one who scared her." She scowled sadly. "I just wish I could do something to help her. She's shattered."

"Maybe you two need a break?" The Texan suggested. "You know, get away from here for a few days."

Catherine seemed to think about this proposition for a few moments. "You know, Sara has always wanted to go to Italy." She mumbled at last. However, as quickly as the idea came to her she brushed it off. "Nah, Grissom would never give us both the time off. We'd be too short staffed."

Nick and Warrick exchanged a look. "Leave it to us."

X x x

"Hey Sar." She jumped at the voice, snapping back from her thoughts. "Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." Cath smiled apologetically, sauntering into her girlfriend's adopted lab.

"It's okay." The brunette assured her, putting down her work and turning to face the strawberry-blonde. "What's up?"

"Nothing." She shrugged, sliding between Sara and the desk and perching on the edge in front of her. "I just came to see how you were."

"Tired." Sara scowled, leaning forward to rest her head against Catherine's stomach and letting her heavy eyes drift closed for a moment.

"I know you are honey," Cath hummed softly, running her fingers through silky brown hair. "But I think I may have a solution to that."

"Drugs?" Sara asked dryly. She felt a hand smack her lightly on the shoulder before wrapping around her back.

"No. I was thinking we could go away somewhere." Sara looked up at her, a puzzled frown on her face.

"Where?"

"Anywhere." Cath shrugged with a smile. "Italy?" she saw her girlfriend's eyes light up at the suggestion, even though her expression remained sceptical.

"Seriously?" she asked, doubt disguising the hope in her voice.

"Why not? We haven't had a vacation together." Catherine pointed out, sliding onto Sara lap. "And it's not like we can't afford it now that you've sold your apartment."

"True." Sara conceded thoughtfully. "But what about work?" Cath laughed, shaking her head.

"Don't worry about work. It's … being sorted." Sara frowned but before she could ask for elaboration, Cath tapped her nose lightly. "So, what do you think?" She asked, a hopeful glint in her eyes. Sara exhaled slowly.

"I think … I need to pack."

Catherine squealed, hugging her tightly. Sara laughed, interlocking her arms around the blonde's waist to hold her in place.

"Ladies." A stern voice from the door startled them apart so fast that Catherine nearly fell over. Ecklie scowled at them from the threshold. "Do we need to go over the rules?"

"No." Cath pursed her lips, utilising the desk to steady herself. "Sorry."

As soon as he wandered out of sight, she resumed her previous position and nestled against Sara with a contented smile.

"So, I was thinking either Venice or Rome?"

X x x

As Ecklie was approaching Grissom office, he passed a smug looking Nick and Warrick coming out. He was tempted to query the good moods, but quite frankly he was having a stressful day and didn't really care why the entirety of the night shift seemed to be so chirpy.

Ignoring the two men, he shoved his way into Grissom's office and slapped a file down on his desk.

The entomologist blinked at it in surprise. If Ecklie had been paying more attention he would have noticed that his colleague appeared somewhat ruffled.

"You need to keep a tighter rein on your staff." He commented bluntly, turning to leave. Grissom stood up before he could vanish.

"Conrad, the girls are going to need some time off."

"Why?" He asked, leaning against the doorframe.

"They're taking some vacation time. They have enough saved up." Ecklie nodded, raising his eyebrows.

"That's why they're so happy then." He nodded in understanding. "Figure out how you're going to cover their shifts and let me know when you're sorted." He waved a hand dismissively, effectively leaving it in Grissom's hands.

The supervisor watched him go with a baffled look. Scuttling to his door, he closed it and drew the blinds before anyone else could appear to badger him with strange requests.

X x x

James Hamley sighed, dropping into his leather chair heavily. His desk was littered with files and various important case documents, of which he had little inclination to read right now.

His tired gaze settled on a framed photograph of his children and a soft smile graced his lips. He picked it up, tracing their tiny faces with his fingertip. Rebecca's hair had been longer then. He had liked it long.

Laura had it cut and styled 'as a treat' when Becca had expressed an interest in being like mommy.

'Like mommy'. Now there was a worrying thought. What if his daughter did turn out like her mother? Manipulative. Naïve. A bully.

This lead him back to another worrying thought that had struck him recently, following a conversation he had had with Laura a few nights earlier.

"_I don't see the harm in letting Becca play with Lindsey at school." James huffed, stirring his drink sullenly. It had been a bad day at work and he had not wanted to come home to listen to his wife bitch about her friends and their love lives. _

"_I don't want Rebecca having anything to do with anyone in that so-called 'family'!" Laura snapped. "She might catch something." She added with a sardonic grin. _

"_It's not contagious, love." He rolled his eyes. Laura narrowed hers. _

"_Whose side are you on?" She asked suspiciously. He sighed. _

"_I'm not on anyone's side. I'm just saying, don't you think we've done enough damage." He put his glass down and reached for his wife's hands but she shied away moodily. "Listen love, I know you don't like what she's doing but Catherine's not hurting anyone. Maybe it's time to just step back and let her live her own life." She stared at him like he'd just sprouted wings. _

"_You know," she hummed thoughtfully after a moment. "If I didn't know better I'd say you were having an affair with her. But obviously…" _

At that point she had cracked up with laughter and promptly ended the conversation by going to take a bubble bath.

But ever since that conversation something had been bothering him. Something Laura had implied in her words.

What if, one day, their daughter came to them and said she was gay? Would that make them love her any less?

Or little Matthew, his boy. What if he were gay?

James knew, if either scenario were to come true, that it would not change how much he adored his children. He would love them no matter who they chose to date.

But the thing that was bothering him, the thing that would continue to bother him for several days, was whether or not the same could be said for Laura.

Would his wife be willing to put her prejudices aside for her children, even if she couldn't for her friends?

**x x x x**

**Nearly finished ... thoughts?** **Suggestions?**


	33. Revelation

_**Revelation**_

Catherine tossed her moisturiser onto the dresser along with her various other bottles and tubes and climbed into bed, where Sara was already settled and studiously watching the news.

"I booked the plane tickets today." Cath said, tearing her girlfriend's attention away from the TV even if her gaze remained fixed there.

"Cool." Sara mumbled. "I phoned the woman about the apartment, it's all sorted. We'll have it for a week."

"A whole week in Venice." Cath hummed softly. "I can't wait."

"Neither can your mom." Sara commented, finally switching off the TV and turning to face her. "She was flitting about behind me the whole time I was on the phone."

"It's a long time since she's had a proper holiday." Cath smiled softly. "Is their accommodation all sorted?"

"Yep. I booked a family suite." She replied. "That way we only needed to make one booking and we can just join them in Rome for the second week."

"Yay." Cath squeaked, shuffling excitedly under the covers.

"Do we know how Nick and Warrick managed to convince Grissom to give us the time off yet?"

"No." She laughed. "But I would have loved to have seen his face when they barged in with that request."

They shared a giggle at their boss's expense, before Catherine switched off her lamp and Sara picked up her book. Catherine started to settle down to sleep when a thought hit her.

"Oh!" She exclaimed, batting Sara on the leg as she pulled herself back up into a seated position. "I remember what I wanted to tell you earlier." Sara blinked at her expectantly. This was not a particularly uncommon occurrence – they rarely had time to speak properly at work or when Lindsey was underfoot and, as such, a lot of conversations were shared in bed. "I heard something interesting through the school grapevine today."

"Do tell." Sara pressed, intrigued. Cath pursed her lips, practically bursting with glee.

"James Hamley has filed for divorce."

"Hamley. Laura's husband?" Sara frowned, dragging the face to memory.

"Mhmm." Catherine nodded with a barely-contained grin. "He filed papers this morning."

"Aw, what a shame." Sara pouted sarcastically. "Laura's going to lose her title of Miss Perfect Vegas." Cat smacked her arm lightly, although she couldn't help a feeling of victory at her ex-friend's turn of misfortune.

"She might lose more than that." She pointed out, finally finding a comfortable position curled against the headboard and turning to face Sara fully. "He's going for full custody."

"Really?" Sara mulled this over. "What's his argument?"

"That she's an irresponsible role model. He's going to use our fight to prove that Laura's homophobia could have a detrimental effect on the kids, particularly as they hit puberty."

"It's a long shot. But it might work."

"By the sounds of it, the judge seems to be taking it seriously." Catherine said. "And it's not like he doesn't have help. He works at the top law firm in the county – he's got endless resources and an army of sharks behind him." Sara sent Cath a sideways glance.

"How do you know all of this?" The blonde smiled devilishly at her.

"I have my sources." She winked. Sara laughed, shaking her head.

"Mysterious." She hummed. "I like that."

"Really?" Cath purred against her ear. "I'll keep that in mind." Capturing her lips, she rolled on top of her and switched off the second lamp, plunging them into darkness while never breaking the kiss.

X x x

Brass cleared his throat, snapping Grissom back from whatever faraway land his mind had wandered to.

"Welcome back." He rolled his eyes. "I said, where are the girls going?"

"Italy." The entomologist sulked, slinking down in his seat.

"Nice." Brass nodded, taking a sip of his scotch. "And why are you letting them go again? I mean, I know you're short staffed."

Grissom sighed. "It was something the boys said." Jim raised an eyebrow, prompting for elaboration. "They were arguing that Cath and Sara deserve a chance to be happy and to do that they need to be able to act like a proper family and do normal family things." He frowned. "Like vacations."

"Okay." Jim nodded. He was about to take another long sip, happy to let the subject drop, but Grissom wasn't finished yet.

"They're right." He said softly, his gaze wandering back to his earlier, interrupted thoughts. "Sara deserves to be happy." Jim waited for a moment to see if he was done, but again when he went to take a drink the bugman continued. "What they said; it reminded me off all the years she waited for me. All the vacation time she stored up because she worked so much overtime. I strung her along for so long that she finally moved on." He frowned at the wall, oblivious to Jim's presence in the room anymore. "She was right – I was too late."

Jim blinked at him. "You got all that from the boy's saying they deserve to be happy?" He clarified.

"Yeah." Gil spun around and looked at him liked it was obvious. "They do deserve to be happy."

"Hey, I'm not arguing there." Brass held up his hands. "I'm just trying to see how your mind works." Grissom nodded, not particularly bothered by this, returning to his position of staring at the glass wall in front of him.

"I don't want to stand in her way anyway. Or Catherine's." He mumbled at last, downing the last of his drink. "Cath did what I couldn't bring myself to do. I want them to make it work. Even if it gets Ecklie on my back for a fortnight."

X x x

"So, you guys all set for your big trip?" Nick asked as he slipped his jacket on.

"Yep. Packed and ready to roll." Cath answered with a lazy smile. "I can't wait."

"I bet Lindsey's looking forward to it." Warrick said in the midst of struggling to pull his boots off. Nick pulled a face as the smell of his socks permeated the small, unventilated room.

"Actually, she doesn't know yet." Sara replied. "We wanted it to be a surprise."

"We're going to tell her when we pick her up from school today – it's the end of term." Cath added with an excited smile. She couldn't wait to see her little girl's face light up when they broke the news to her.

"Aw, she'll be made up." Nick grinned. "And your mom's still going too, right?"

"Yeah; her and Lindsey are going to Rome for the full two weeks. Sara and I are going to Venice for a week and then we're going to meet them in Rome."

"Sounds nice." Greg whistled from his spot, leaning casually against the doorframe. "I bet you can't wait to get to Venice – the city of romance… just the two of you … alone…"

"You're right, we can't." Cath cut him off before his energetic mind could run away with itself any further. Sara patted him on the shoulder as she drifted past him into the hall.

"We'll send you a postcard." She promised.

"I'd prefer a photograph!" He hollered after her with a cheeky wink.

X x x

Lindsey squinted as she emerged from school into the bright afternoon sun. Her gaze automatically searched for the area where one of her parents was always stood.

Except today they were both there.

Running over, she came to a halt in front of them, cutting short their conversation with another parent.

"Hey Linds." Sara smiled down at her.

"Hi." She squeaked. "You're both here. Is everything okay?" A soft frown embedded itself in her forehead.

"Everything's fine honey." Catherine crouched down, gripping her arms. "We just have a surprise for you and we couldn't wait until we got home to tell you."

"We're getting a dog?" she guessed excitedly. Cath glared up at Sara.

"That's your fault." She pointed out. With a guilty smile, Sara joined her at Lindsey's eye level.

"We're not getting a dog, baby." She said, sharing a look with Catherine. With a nudge from the strawberry-blonde, she produced an envelope from her back pocket and held it out to the child.

Lindsey opened it curiously, surprised to find it full of money.

Money she didn't recognise.

"What's it for?" She asked in befuddlement. Catherine felt horrible for causing such confusion in her own daughter but it was just so cute.

"Well, you're going to need some pennies to spend in Italy." She said, watching a range of emotions cross her tiny face before it finally sank in.

"We're going on holiday?" The little blonde asked at last, her voice softening.

"Got it in one, kiddo." Sara grinned. Lindsey threw herself at the woman, nearly sending her flying. Cath placed a hand on Sara's back to steady her, laughing at her startled expression. She scooped the child up, repositioning her onto her hip and both adults stood back up. "So, we'd better go home and start packing, huh?"

**x x x x**

**Fluff :)**


	34. Fly me to the moon

**Hey guys, I know this is really short and not my best by a long shot. But in my defence I have had a really crappy day and I wanted to give you something to read to make myself feel better. **

**Sorry for the shortness, but I hope you like it**_**  
><strong>_

**x x x x**

_**Fly me to the moon**_

Sara tossed the contents of the wardrobe onto the floor, muttering to herself under her breath.

"How far away is Italy?" A little voice chirped from the bed.

"Uh, about 6000 miles." Sara answered distractedly; still hunting for Catherine's missing shoes.

"Wow." Lindsey cooed. "What's it like?"

"I don't know. I've never been before." She answered, abandoning the closet and crawling across the floor to check under the bed.

"Do they have ice cream in Italy?"

"They have the best ice cream in the world." She reached under the bed as far as she could, fumbling blindly for anything resembling sandals. "Except they call it gelato."

"Gelato." Lindsey repeated slowly. "Can we get some?"

"Baby, you can have as much as you want." Sara promised, abandoning her search and joining her step-daughter on the bed. "We all need this vacation." She tucked a stray blonde hair out of Lindsey's face, smiling down at her. The little girl smiled back, leaning into her touch.

"Hey." Cath interrupted, biting back the urge to say 'aww' when she unintentionally barged in on their tender moment. "Did you find them?"

"No." Sara sighed, dropping her hand.

"Oh screw it. I'll buy more when we get there." The blonde shrugged it off, grabbing a bobble from the vanity and scraping her hair into an untidy ponytail.

"Oh good." Sara exchanged a look with Lindsey. "Shoe shopping." A sweet laugh bubbled out of the little girl at Sara's mock sad face, causing the brunette to crack up as well.

"When you two are quite finished." Cath rolled her eyes, placing hands on her hips. "I believe we have a plane to catch."

"Yes, you're right." Sara agreed, standing up and swinging the little girl onto her hip in one smooth motion. "I've got the kid, you got the tickets?"

"Yes." Cath nodded, frowning. "I think."

There was a distinctive beep from outside and they all shared a look. "Our ride's here."

X x x

"Alright ladies!" Nick grinned, leaning casually against his car. Lily waved excitedly at them from the front seat.

"Hey Nicky, thanks for doing this." Cath smiled, dropping the suitcases on the front step and tugging the door shut behind them.

"No problem. Happy to help." He winked. Sara dropped Lindsey into his arms so he could strap her in while she helped her girlfriend load the bags into the trunk. Somehow, despite Catherine packing half her wardrobe, they had managed to keep it down to two bags: one for the women and a little one for Lindsey.

"Alright-y. Let's get this show on the road." He announced when everyone was strapped in. "Got your tickets?"

"Yep." Cath nodded, patting her purse.

"Passports?" Lily added.

"With the tickets."

"Did you set the burglar alarm?"

"I did." Sara piped up, checking Lindsey's seatbelt.

"Locked the door?" The car fell silent for a moment.

Catherine managed to perfect the art of multi-tasking as she sprinted to the front door while simultaneously hunting for her keys in the depths of her purse – much to Sara and Nick's thorough amusement.


	35. Winning the Peace

**Okay, I'm sure divorce settlements take longer than two weeks, but for the purposes of my story they don't :) Also, only one more to go! Thanks for reading this far**

**x x x x**

_**Winning the Peace  
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Sara smiled up lazily at the sky. She was sad to be back from Italy, but it was nice to be back home again and even nicer that they hadn't quite come down from their vacation high yet.

"Someone's tanned." A voice spoke from beside her.

"Penny, hi." Sara greeted the parent who was looking her up and down in envy.

When the women first got together Sara had felt so out of place in the school grounds, but gradually people had gotten used to seeing her and over time she had found herself being accepted into the community.

It wasn't quite the warm, fuzzy feeling once she felt accepted at the lab but it was nice to feel welcomed all the same.

"So, how was the vacation?" Penny asked, leaning against the railings.

"It was brilliant." Sara grinned. "We only got back early this morning. We told Lindsey she didn't have to go to school but she couldn't wait to tell her friends all about it."

They both shared a laugh at her sweetness.

"So, where is Catherine?" Penny asked at last.

"Sound asleep when I left her." Sara smiled fondly. "She crashed out before she even made it upstairs."

"Awe." Penny grinned. She had always liked the strawberry-blonde and over the past few months she had formed a good rapport with her girlfriend.

From across the grounds they felt a pair of eyes on them and both glanced up to see Laura Hamley – or Laura Partridge as she would from now on be known – glowering at them. She was stood alone, away from Karen and Deborah.

"Oh, look whose back." Penny muttered, leaning close to Sara. "You missed the divorce hearing. James got custody, she gets weekend access only."

"Really?" Sara tried to hide the happiness in her voice.

"Yeah." Penny, on the other hand, was positively gleeful in her narrative. "He made her out to be a selfish, homophobic drunk who didn't have the children's best interests at heart."

"Huh." Sara nodded. "I didn't know she was a drunk." They shared a small chuckle before lapsing back to the topic of Italy and gondola rides.

However, just as they were getting to the good part (in Penny's imagination at least), a figure wandered into their vision, blocking the sun from their toasty little corner.

"It's your fault." Laura hissed, fixing her cold gaze onto Sara's.

"I'm sorry?" Sara frowned, startled but the unexpected interruption. Laura shook her blonde hair out dramatically, raising her voice.

"You and your pathetic little girlfriend!" She barked. "Thanks to you I lost my kids. My house. I lost everything because of you!" Sara bristled as a few parents looked their way nervously.

"We never asked you to treat us the way you did." The brunette pointed out coldly. "You brought everything on yourself, Laura. You tried to ruin Catherine's career."

"She deserved it!"

"Why?" Sara shouted back before remembering where she was and lowering her voice. "What did she do to deserve that? Other than looking for some happiness? Or was that it – you were jealous that she had the guts to break free from your little group and make a life for herself that did not revolve around shopping and getting your nails done?"

Laura's mouth fell open. She was not used to people arguing back against her. And she certainly was not used to being made to look the fool.

Sara took the chance to scrutinise her for a moment. She looked a damn sight less attractive with no make-up and her hair barely contained in a ponytail.

"You know something," Laura continued once she regained the use of her voice. "You can pretend that you fit in here but you don't. And you can stand there like you're not doing anything wrong but we all know you are." She spat venomously. "So you just stand there and pretend like you're better than me, …"

"You mean like you have to every other parent in this yard?" Sara interrupted.

There was a quiet mumble of appreciation from some of the parents. Laura was about to bite back with a callas retort but the kids started to appear from school and she seemed to think better of it.

Perhaps the judges words were playing in her head.

Lindsey, front of the crowd, scuttled towards Sara with her arms outstretched.

"Boujiorno mamma." She chirped fluently, reaching up in an unsubtle hint to be lifted.

"Aw, she's so cute." Penny cooed. Sara picked her up, swinging her easily onto her hip.

"You can't have her." She teased playfully. Penny poked her in the ribs and ruffled Lindsey's hair.

"Fine. Say hi to Catherine for me." She grinned, wandering over to locate her own offspring in the crowd.

"I will." She promised. "Enjoy your weekend, Laura." She added coolly, placing her daughter back on the ground and gripping her hand tightly as she sidled passed the jaded blonde.

X x x

Catherine stirred when she heard the front door close. She sat up slowly, gathering her bearings. She was on the couch; Sara had wrapped her in a blanket.

Speaking of, Lindsey bounded into the room followed by the woman herself.

"Hi mommy." Linds squeaked, giving her a brief hug before skipping towards the kitchen to help herself to a snack.

"Hey." She greeted in return, too late as the child had already disappeared. She waved a hand, shaking her head in amusement.

"Hi there sleeping beauty." A smooth voice whispered in her ear as a pair of arms snuck around her shoulders from behind. Cath smiled, leaning back into the embrace.

"Hey you." She tilted her head back to peck Sara's lips. "How was the school run? Everyone pleased to see you back?" She joked, leading her girlfriend by the hand to sit next to her on the couch.

"Oh, I'll fill you in later." Sara rolled her eyes.

"Why? What did I miss?" Cat asked, intrigued. Sara laughed dryly, shaking her head. When Catherine continued to stare at her with a mystified blue gaze she considered telling her what had happened; but looking at her ruffled hair and her sleep-filled eyes, Sara realised that it didn't matter anymore. Who cared what Laura thought; Sara had the most beautiful woman in the world.

"You know what," Sara shook her head. "It doesn't matter." She leant forward, capturing her confused girlfriend's lips in a sweet kiss.

"Okay." Cath frowned. Sara just smiled at her enigmatically, tucking a stray blonde wave aside.

"You look beautiful." Cat's face lit up, all trace of confusion vanishing. She blushed beneath her light tan, a shy smile on her lips.

"Flatterer." She mumbled, leaning into Sara's shoulder playfully.


	36. A Perfect World

**Well Ladles and Jellyspoons, the end has come. **

**However, since I am on such a roll tonight I have posted the first chapter of my new story too...**

**Anyways, thank you as always for being such cool and groovy readers and thank you especially for all the reviews  
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_**A Perfect World**_

Catherine muttered under her breath as she nearly tripped over the suitcase that lay abandoned at the bottom of the stairs. It had been there since they got back from Italy three weeks ago and they had yet to put it away.

A part of her wondered if it was because it acted as a constant reminder of their vacation; if she closed her eyes she could still taste the wine Sara and her had shared their first night in Venice.

Shaking her head and sliding around the case, Cath headed for the living room to find her purse, which she had discarded on the couch earlier.

"Hey." Sara greeted, not tearing her eyes from the TV screen. "Your friend Karen, her husband's called David, right? David Carpenter?"

"She's not my friend anymore." Cat muttered, checking how much cash she had in her purse. "But yeah, why?"

"I think he's gone bust."

"Well, I can't say I'm surprised." She mused, joining Sara stood in front of the TV where a pretty news reader was stood outside Dave Carpenter's former headquarters. "I always thought he was a slippery bastard."

Brushing this new piece of information aside, Catherine turned to Sara and pressed a kiss to her lips.

"Right, I'm meeting Debs for coffee, I won't be long." She announced. "Try not to break the house while I'm gone." Sara grinned down at Lindsey, who had materialised by her side and was clinging to her waist.

"We're not promising anything."

As Catherine made her way to the door she could already hear them cooking up some new way to entertain themselves in her absence. She paused in the threshold, looking back at them with a loving smile.

The last few months had been a whirlwind but staring at her perfect family, she knew it had all been worth it.

Not normally one for believing in fate, she couldn't help but think that some higher power had been pulling some strings.

Why else would she run into Lorna of all people, having not seen her since college? Unless she had come back into her life for a reason …

… to lead her to something, perhaps?

Or perhaps because she was the one person who could get through to her. To help her see where she had gone wrong.

Either way, she was thankful for whoever had been looking out for her. Because this was it.

This was perfection.

**~Fin~**


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